1665/AWftF: The Fourth Dragon Ball

AWftF: The Fourth Dragon Ball
Date of Scene:	25 February 2015
Location:	WMAT Arena - Northern Mountains
Synopsis:	Heroes and villains come together in a ludicrous attempt to retrieve the fourth Dragon Ball.
Cast of Characters:	20, 38, 83, 127, 140, 180, Mister Satan (TP) (Dropped), 353, 486, 573, 622, 626, 663, 702
Tinyplot:	A Wish for the Future

---

Mister Satan (TP) (Dropped) has posed:
Out in the middle of the woods, outside the red-striped door of a quaint cottage seemingly built of gumdrops and gingerbread and cotton candy and peppermint sticks, Raditz is being threatened with a broom.

"I told you not to come back unless you were ready to satisfy my challenge!" The old woman wielding said broom is no taller than three feet tall -- four if you add the significant point to her hat -- and looks to be about as shriveled as a prune. The black cat on her shoulder rowrs and hisses to emphasize her speech. "And now it's just YOU come back alone, and how am I supposed to know you're as good as you say you are if I have no one to compare you against?!"

The black cat fluffs up and takes another swipe at Raditz as the witch hoists her broom. "So, go on! Come back another time! That Dragon Ball's mine until you meet my terms!"

It's a pretty nice area. Bet the trails would look good if marked out by breadcrumbs...

Ryuko Matoi (140) has posed:
    Ryuko has a sort of interest, in all this. Considering the nonsense she went through to get the one she managed to snag in that huge clusterfuck, the last time she tried.. Well. Hopefully it won't be nearly as stupid.

Or not. She's totally not pleased when she shows up, and sees Raditz being hit with a broom by an old woman living in goddamn candy cookie house. This is so dumb, why am I here, ugh.

Raditz (486) has posed:
    So here was Raditz, a Saiyan Warrior, a savior of the Multiverse, former ruler of earth, former king of all Saiyans, and generally awesome guy, being fended off by a little old lady with a freaking broom, and every time he tries to get passed her to just grab the Dragon Ball, especially since she's just not listening to him when he's telling her he's trying to help.
    After another broom smack, Raditz who is busy blocking it and trying to not get hit in the face, "Come on, Lady! I saved your planet from Vegeta! The PTO would probably be strip mining it if it weren't for me! How does this NOT qualify me as good!"

    He listens to the alerts of arrivals on his comms, and mutters, "Oh thank god..."

Toph Beifong (20) has posed:
    The report had been really weird, honestly. Though Toph doesn't doubt that it was even weirder to actually be attacked by an old granny and a broom.

    Still, now that she's actually here she can't help but wonder just what is going on. The blind girl blinks as she arrives, her feet taking in the scenery easily enough. Or rather, the old lady showing Raditz her skill with a broom. Okay, she feels a bit bad for him, so Toph hurries onwards. "You should have let us come along from the get go!" she scolds him with a slight huff, then she turns her focus to the old lady. "I'm sorry, we did tell him we would come along as you requested, but I guess he didn't want to bother us," she says. While she can't see the cat she sure as hell can hear it, though she keeps her hands back. Just in case the old lady tries to whack her with a broom too.

    Perhaps all the manners and etiquette her parents forced on her as a child can come in handy here. "There are more coming too, so please... give us a chance to prove our worth." She gestures towards the path and towards where she can 'see' Ryuko. "I'm Toph Beifong. Might I ask your name?"

Simon Petrikov (622) has posed:
Simon Petrikov grew up on horror stories of witches. One in particular, by the name of Baba Yaga, just being reminded of, left him with nightmares recently. He has always has a fascination with superstitions, but there's a big difference between superstitions, folktales, mythology, and the like and... Facing the real thing. And ever since discovering magic and monsters are real, this antiquarian has been forced to consider the possibility that those tales might have been true too.

Now, here he is, in the woods, facing a house actually made out of candy, and some old woman with a broom and pointy hat threatening a super alien warrior. Not for the first time, a sense of unreality sweeps over the blue-skinned man. Though as a testament to either his adaptiveness or how broken his own mind has become, he just accepts what he's seeing and moves forward. He sees crazy stuff all the time anyway.

Sigh. All the time.

"Hey, bro! Err... Bro... Brosauce, broskate, brosis, broskander, bro-ma'am. Yes! Ma'am! Hey, ma'am!" Simon calls out as he jogs forward, waving a hand, trying to disrupt any further cruel beatings of Raditz. "He's not alone! I'm here!" Even if he kind of wishes he wasn't. "Terribly sorry to trespass, etc. I'm here for the challenges." Maybe his knowledge of this kind of stuff will be helpful instead of just freaking him out at the possibility of what kind of challenges they might face and the consequences if they fail.

Kyra Hyral (626) has posed:
    Raditz's specific terms were "bring back friends that were worthy of a Dragonball" in his report. What exactly would that mean anyway? Friends worthy of a little old witch? Where a big, bad saiyan warrior wasn't good enough? Kyra's seen a pair of saiyans fight so whatever this woman was looking for it clearly wasn't fighting prowess-which is great for white mages with puny white mage muscles.

    Thankfully, the report gave Kyra ample time to prepare for this particular mission. Her preparation comes in the form of a plate of freshly-baked chocolate chip cookies. They smell like chocolate chip cookies and they look like chocolate chip cookies. Whether or not they taste like chocolate chip cookies is completely dependent on whether or not Kyra made them personally.

    (Fortunately for everyone involved, she did not bake them herself, having gone through great pains to obtain /edible/ cookies for this very important mission.)

    "Hi-!" Kyra starts-only to stop and stare at the house this woman lives in. "...is...is that /real/ candy?"

Noble Six (38) has posed:
    The silver armored SPARTAN warrior arrives a short while after the other Union members do. Noble Six is not happy. This lady has a dragonball, and no doubt the Confederates will be closing in soon if their radar is half as good as the one Raditz has.

    They have to try to get this thing from this old woman as quickly as possible, and it seems that they'll have to fulfil this woman's challenge. Moving up next to Raditz, Noble Six takes a moment to look very far down at the old woman, "What /is/ your challenge?" She asks, "It must not be a feat of strength, or I'm sure our friend here," She slaps Raditz on the back with one MJOLNIR armor covered gauntlet, "Would have already done it."

Taylita (180) has posed:
     When Taylita heard the report and realized she was actually in time to join in for once, she raced here as quickly as possible. She lands near Raditz, snickering as she watches him get whacked with a broom. "Heya Raditz. So, this is the old lady we have to prove our worth to? What does she consider proof-worthy?" the saiyan woman says, crossing her arms over her chest as her tail sways in an amused fashion.

     She looks around at the others arriving, then back at Raditz. "Maybe she just wants some ingredients for her potions or something. I mean, that one she used on you didn't do anything, right?"

Kirikou (127) has posed:
    Okay so, this is for the Kernel. While he would go out of his way to help many Confederates, Kirikou would jump out of a perfectly sound plane for Serori. That's the kind of loyalty mere money can't buy! That, and there's few other ways to quickly get into woods when you have no magical means of transport at hand. A silent but effective means of rapid-deployment.

    There is, however, a tactical drawback to parachuting in to woods. While it's possible someone might see his parachute against the sky somehow through the woods, it's far more likely they'll hear him first. The parachute snags, leaving the Confederate paratrooper strung up in the air. He curses, not loudly but with feeling. <Fire, get us out of this.>

    Kirikou holds up an armored fist, and a brief blaze of reddish light will be another obvious cue of his arrival. A flurry of movement, a moment of charring, and Kirikou's freed from the harness, dropping to the ground in an earthshaking KHWUUUMP. He straightens from the ground, rising up out of the crater. Okay so it's less than a foot deep, but he DID drop in from a pretty good height and one should do one's best to make a dramatic entrance.

Meriax (702) has posed:
Meriax wanted to see about this whole 'Dragon Ball' thing. It's no surprise that she volunteered to come. She thought it would look good in her collection... or, given Serori's comments the last time she spoke about it, trading it for something that did. Meriax isn't attracted to the ball itself so much as what it represents.

That and she needed to get out for a little and stretch her wings. What better way?

Of course, she wasn't expecting to be directed to a... a... "Is that house made of /food/?" Meriax asks herself as she starts to descend toward the reported Union movement. It's not going to cause a problem if she takes a look around, especially because it seems to be the nexus of Union folk in the area - she starts to spot people down there as she descends, her eyes shifting this way and that.

She appears to be following Kirikou down. Maybe they're together. Or maybe Meriax is just intrigued by people who fall from the sky and make a (small) crater on landing. (It's the second.)

Dracula Vlad Tepes (83) has posed:
    So, maybe they weren't /quite/ successful the last time they went out. Slogra and Gaibon are nonetheless decent at their job, and in the off chance this proves to be a suicide mission or other form of failed endeavor, they're also relatively expendable. In the worst case, Dracula can probably call someone much more competent and valuable to help them if all else fails.

    It's for that reason that the duo fly through the air right now, the burly blue gargoyle Gaibon carrying the lanky, giant dinosaur-bird Slogra in his feet, claws latched around the taller demon's shoulders. Slogra, as usual, brandishes his spear in his claws, but he mostly droops in Gaibon's grasp as the two of them fly off toward the source of the alert.

    Until, at least, Slogra's keen eyes catch sight of the delicious, delicious candy house - and, more importantly, the variety of Union members and allies gathering in front of it, being beaten viciously by an old lady with a broom. Slogra gives a croaking laugh. "Ha! I knew it! Look at them, can't even hold off an old maid! C'mon, Gaibon, drop me in!"

    Gaibon concedes without question, releasing Slogra to allow the lizard-demon to fall straight down toward the Unionites. Not right on top of them, though: he needs a dramatic entrance, and so he crashes down a good distance from the group, but near enough that the sight of a lanky grey /thing/ smashing down nearby is unmistakeable. Slogra rises immediately after and points his spear at the group with a vicious squawk. "A-HA! You thought you could just slither in without us noticing, huh?! Well, too late! This old lady is just giving you the /start/ of your hellish torment that /I'm/ gonna continue!"

Vegeta (663) has posed:
Vegeta's power level can be felt coming in from the distance, -fast-. Though he's no where to be seen quite yet. It's nice and ominous, and the worst part is, no one has any idea what kind of mood he's in at the moment!

The Prince of all Saiyans will be here in two episodes!

Mihk Lihzeh (573) has posed:
    Mihk sighs a little as she strides along the forest path, book open in her right hand. She passes Kirikou by a couple of paces, stops and snaps her book closed, before glancing back at him. The Miqo'te adjusts her glasses. "Far too flashy, my dear ally. Come, let us not dally, the others are waiting." she suggests, before resuming her path, placing her tome on her belt by its chain.

    Mihk enters the clearing with the house, eyes wincing slightly from the daylight streaming down from the breaks in the canopy above. "We are not the first to arrive it seems. Though by my calculations, it will be the Confederacy that leaves with the prize today."

Mister Satan (TP) (Dropped) has posed:
The gramma-looking woman in a witch's get-up scrutinizes all newcomers through the monocle she produces from her breast pocket. The lens is thick enough to magnify her eyeball to at least five times its normal size, giving her a decided O_o kind of appearnce as she squints at everyone. Ryuko, Toph, Noble Six, Simon Petrikov, Kyra Hyral, Taylita...each of 'em gets that look one by one.

Putting the monocle away, she scoffs. "Of course it's real candy, girl. I wouldn't be a witch if it was otherwise. Well. I see the big one's got friends after all. So, he's not just a bully! Kyeheheheh -- huh?" Only about three teeth stick out from her mouth as she laughs. That's probably what you get for eating a diet of candy.

That 'huh?' is her puzzled response to Kirikou's arrival. And Meriax's. A dragon? Once again, the witch digs out her monocle for a sweeping scrutiny. "Now what kind of kid hangs out with monsters? Isn't that a little dangerous?"

When MORE monsters show up, the witch looks truly puzzled, and a touch alarmed. "If these are the kinds of friends you keep, you're going to have a lot of explaining to do," she asides to Raditz, now sounding suspicious. "HEY! YOU ALL LISTEN UP! IF THERE'S ANY FIGHTING HERE, I'M GONNA CHUCK THAT DRAGON BALL INTO MY NEXT POT OF EXTRADIMENSIONAL STEW, AND IT'S BYE-BYE FOR THE NEXT YEAR! I'm Granny Zam. Call me Granny Zam! Not Granny! Not Zam! Granny Zam! And if any of you want my Dragon Ball, you'll take part in my challenge."

The monocle's lens catches the light, becoming an opaque white disc. "A CHALLENGE OF CHARACTER."

Granny Zam looks around again, lets out another confident 'kyeheheheh'. "Do you accept?!"

Ryuko Matoi (140) has posed:
    "Uh, sure. Whatever, if it means gettin' the dragonball, then. Fine. I'm in."

Ryuko places her hands behind her head, arching her back some, and crossing one foot behind the other. She shrugs, as well, and of note, has a diminutive Scissor Blade hanging from one finger. She's decked out in Senketsu's transformed state, of note.

"I'm game for any challenges."

Raditz (486) has posed:
    "YES." Raditz says pretty much immediately and in a rush, paying notice to the presence of the feds and the approach of Vegeta's Ki in the distance who'll probably not make the diplomatic approach easy. He glares at the old lady, "We accept your challenge of character. Let's just make it fast."

Toph Beifong (20) has posed:
    "Wait... you are a /real/ witch?" Toph asks, looking a bit confused where she stands. But hey, at least she seems more inclined to listen to them now that Raditz isn't alone. When people she didn't expect to show however up crash into the ground and ask about the state of the old lady's house, the earthbender can't help but tense slightly as she turns, her eyes narrowing. Oh damn. And she recognizes one of the Confederates all too well. Instantly her arm snaps out, and she points a dirty finger directly at Kilik. "What are you guys doing here, Gloves?!" Oh damnit, are the Feds after the Dragon Ball too? And Slogra's threat earns a frown from the blind girl. "Too bad for you we got here first--"

    Well, the old lady seems to mean business. Toph turns back to the old lady. "We are not with them," she states. "We are not here to start trouble either," Toph responds honestly. Though... no fighting? That catches Toph's attention, and she can't help but pout just slightly. But fine, if they want a chance at the Dragon Ball, then they have no choice. "Fine, Granny Zam." Better keep that in mind to stay on her good side.

    "I accept your challenge." Because Toph knows she has plenty of character in addition to other stuff that counts. And she waits for the rest of her allies to accept as well, placing her hands on her hips.

Taylita (180) has posed:
     Taylita looks around as the Confederates gather, then off into the distance as she feels Vegeta's power signature. "Guess we have some company. Just so you know, Granny Zam, those monsters are not with us. We are with the Union. Only good monsters are on our side." she says with a grin.

     Then, they are challenged to a challenge of character. Taylita isn't sure what that means, but she can only assume that those with good character will be given the dragonball. "A challenge of character? We've got this in the bag." she says before blinking. Wait, what if this is an -evil- witch? Then character might mean bad character. She shrugs to herself, then nods in agreement with her comrades. "A challenge of character should give the Confederates plenty of trouble, seeing as many of them have none."

Kyra Hyral (626) has posed:
    Kyra opens her mouth, about to ask the witch if she can lick her house. After a moment, she closes it.

    As the members of the Confederacy start to arrive, she seems slightly peeved, scanning those there for any sign of Vegeta only to be surprised to not yet see him. Perhaps more awkwardly, Kilik is here. She makes a face, doubly worried to see monsters and a dragon joining him, and turns right back to Granny Zam. "I accept your challenge!"

    Afterwards, she takes a moment to relax and calm down. A languid smile spreads across her face and she turns to wave at Kilik all friendly-like. She doesn't seem especially worried since if they pick a fight then they lose their chance at the Dragonball too.

Simon Petrikov (622) has posed:
Simon looks around in alarm. Some of these people he recognizes the voices of, like Toph, and Raditz, and Ryuko, some he knows the appearances of, like Kyra, but he's pretty sure some of these people aren't with the Union. "Yo, uh, not all of these people are with us, just so we're clear, Granny Zam." As the challenge is named, Simon starts considering possibilities. "Simon Petrikov. A pleasure to meet you, Granny Zam," he offers. One: Because it's just polite. Two: Because showing proper respect may be part of one's character. Simon is glad that Taylita helped clarify, because even he wasn't quite sure if these new arrivals were just people he didn't know or not.

"I'll do my best to take your challenges and treat them with the respect they're due." And hopefully not get turned into candy and get eaten.

Mihk Lihzeh (573) has posed:
    Mihk chuckles softly. "We are not with these people. And I would politely ask you, Granny Zam, not to refer to me as a 'Monster', please. I am a Miqo'te, and my name is Mihk Lihzeh. I gladly accept your challenge." she says, adjusting her glasses again. "Let the games begin, hmm?"

Kirikou (127) has posed:
    Kirikou smirks at Mihk. "Style is important sometimes." he claims. Maybe it WAS too flashy, given he got snagged up in the tree, but the final landing was complete badass and he's more than a little pleased with it. Still, they have work to do. He accompanies the Miqo'te to the house in the clearing, assessing those who are there before them.

    If anything, Kilik's eyes gleam with enjoyment at the array of force laid out before him. Some he knows personally. The rest, more or less, he can recognize from Confederate files. Steel-clad fists held up before him, he seems ready for a fight. Only to falter when the old woman issues her challenge. No fighting?

    "Challenge of character huh?" Kirikou repeats, light reflecting off his glasses. "Well, I've always been called a character! I'll accept!" he says, raising a fist in salute. And if the witch DOES throw the dragon ball into the stew, well, he can always feed someone here to one of the twins? Nothing like nasty witches in one's way after all. He doesn't even bother thinking about the danger involved in attacking someone who's standing off so many of both Union and Confederate powerhouses. If this goes badly, he'll make the best of it somehow!

Dracula Vlad Tepes (83) has posed:
    Well that pretty much takes the wind out of Slogra's lanky sails. He pauses, staring, then blinking, then puffing up his emaciated chest. "Of course! I, Slogra, would never back down from a challenge! C'mon, show us what you want us to do!"

    He then pauses to brandish his spear at Taylita. "I am an /amazing/ monster and I will not stand for your insults, lady!"

    Gaibon lands nearby soon enough. He looks slightly confused, but grumbles like two stones grinding together. "...right, what he said. So what's this challenge of character gonna be about, anyway?"

Meriax (702) has posed:
Meriax lands with a thump. She's a pretty small dragon, but she's still quite a bit bigger than any of the humans here. She spends a moment settling her wings before she crouches, looking down at the crowd of Union folks and, equally importantly, Granny Zam.

"I'm not a monster," she says, "I'm the great dragon Meriax!" Bringing herself to her full height, she spreads her wings, posing for a moment before dropping back down into her usual crouching posture. Her eyes rove again across the others (she knows none of them) before exhaling a puff of smoke from her nostrils.

"Fine! I will show you I'm better than any of the humans here. If that's how you're going to challenge me...!"

Vegeta (663) has posed:
Before anyone knows it, Vegeta is beginning to descend from the air, arms crossed, looking casually grumpy. Which is probably a normal mood for him. "I accept your challenge on behalf of the Saiyan Queen, grandma." he declares as he lands, peering directly at her. "I'll defeat every person here and completely dominate this challenge of character."

Noble Six (38) has posed:
    A challenge of character? Noble Six thinks she'll be able to pass a challenge of character. However that could just be a term the old woman is using...Sorry, not old woman, Granny Zam. At least they have something to call her now.

    The SPARTAN nods her head. She'll take the challenge of character. Vegeta's arrivale makes her bristle, but it's impossible to see under the opaque mask, "I will accept this challenge."

Raditz (486) has posed:
    Raditz groans quietly when Vegeta arrives, and then says, "Well then, I think you just botched it right off the bat, Vegeta."

Mister Satan (TP) (Dropped) has posed:
"VERY WELL THEN!" The witch pockets her monocle, freeing up a handle for vital cat-pettings. The black cat, reflective of Granny Zam's mood, leans into her soft old lady hand and purrpurrs away. "Since we have so many present...we'll split into two teams. That's fair, isn't it? Only closer look, I think you're already opposed in a fashion, anyway, so it should be easy to split."

Granny Zam stalks through the collected crowd with hands folded together behind her back. "You go here, you go there," she repeats, one by one, until she's neatly separated the Union members from the Confederate members. It's only Ryuko who gives the lady pause. "Hmm," she grumbles. "You don't seem to belong anywhere, so I guess you get to choose. Kyeheheh! Aren't I gracious?"

All at once, she stomps her right food forward, and throws her arms out and up into the air. Somewhere, a trumpet plays a tremulous, tinny fanfare; the cat's yowl is more impressive. "THE FIRST CHALLENGE!" Granny Zam declares. "YOU MUST REVEAL TO ME..."


"YOUR MOST AMUUUUUUUUUUSING JOKE!"

"Kyeheheheheh! If I like your joke best, it's a point for your team~!"

Stepping back, she stops to stare at Mihk. "Are you a cat?"

Mihk Lihzeh (573) has posed:
    Mihk's ears flatten down against her head. "No, I am not a cat." she replies calmly, though her tail swishes in mild irritation. "I have a joke from my homeland." achem. "A Hyur, an Elezen and a Lalafel walk into a tavern. The innkeep tells them. 'That mirror grants your hearts most precious desire, if your intentions are pure.' referring to a large full body mirror set against the far wall." she pauses to take a breath. "The Hyur steps up to the mirror, and receives a fishing rod of the best materials. The Elezen receives a masterwork bow of Gridanian ash, but the Lalafel receives nothing." she pauses, then smiles. "The Lalafel explains, 'My hearts desire is to be with my friends. I need nothing else.'"

    "Hmm, more a life advice than a joke, though I suppose it is coloured by locality."

Kirikou (127) has posed:
    "Test of character huh?" Kilik says, looking over at the Union fighters. Toph and Kyra get grins. Raditz gets a smirk as he rips into his old enemy. Points given, as far as Kilik's concerned. Trash talking is always worthwhile, even if it's not exactly his style. He can certainly appreciate a quick and well-placed zing.

    However, Kilik has more important things on his mind now. He stares at the witch as she makes her demand, blinking owlishly behind his glasses. Then he laughs. "Oh, this is going to be GOOD!" he insists, and without any time for thought or preparation launches into a joke.

    "A family of onions; mother, father and daughter onion, are out for a walk. They get to some traffic lights at an intersection and as the green man lights up, they begin to cross - but a careless driver catches the daughter onion and she rolls ot the side of the road, horribly injured. Layers are falling off as she's loaded into the ambulance."

    She's rushed to the hospital and into surgery. Father onion is rolling up and down the hallway nervously, mother onion weeping uncontrollably. After what feels like an eternity, the doctor finally emerges to speak to the parents. "I have good news and bad news."

    "Okay, give it to us, Doc. We want to know how she's doing."

    "Well," says the doctor, "the good news is your daughter is going to live." The parent onions feel a huge relief, then ask for the bad news. Dutifully and solemnly the doctor replies, "She's going to be a vegetable for the rest of her life."

Meriax (702) has posed:
Meriax seems to be all right with being sorted as Granny Zam decides, taking a couple big steps to the side and looking at the Union group with something between disdain and curiosity. She doesn't know any of them, and so there is some rather uncomfortable (maybe even awkward) staring with her golden eyes.

But then she's asked to do something and, for the first time tonight, Meriax is at a loss for words.

"A joke?" she says, before scanning the rest of the Confederacy group. Who does jokes? Her left foot's claws absently scrape at dirt while she's thinking. She looks perplexed. "I don't tell jokes! I don't have a jester or anything! But if you insist..."

Meriax brings herself up to her full height. "Why are dragons good storytellers?" She holds that position for exactly ten seconds. This allows anyone who wants to guess to guess. She doesn't react regardless of what is called at her, if anything.

"Because they have fantastic tails!" Meriax raises her own before flicking it to the side, whip-like despite its bulk. It hits a tree, which shudders with the impact but otherwise seems intact. Her facial expression has shifted slightly.

...is she grinning?

Vegeta (663) has posed:
"Hah! I am a saiyan prince, I'm versed in all aspects of murder, including -slaying- you with -comedy-, and -splitting- your -sides-. HAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!!!" Vegeta has his hands on his sides as he tilts his head back in laughter, then suddenly his face becomes very serious. "For the queen of my people, I will defeat all of their inferior jokes!"

He points directly at the woman, then proceeds to execute his joke. "There was once a man, one of the most powerful on his planet. He found a nice girlfriend and saved the world. So noble was this man, that when he died, he trained and returned for the greatest threat of his life!"

"Finally, that threat arrived..." He's keeping his arms crossed telling this joke with a constant grin. "And then he was instantly killed because he was a weakling, as were all of his friends. Then the threat had a child with his girlfriend because of his pathetic this hero actually was. Because, you see, Yamcha is the joke. He is a living joke, and there is nothing funnier than how much of a failure he is. HAHAAHAHHAAAAAA!!!" He holds his hands onto his sides again, throwing his head back in laughter.

Ryuko Matoi (140) has posed:
    Ryuko sidles on over to the Union side. "Since they're the ones who asked for my help, seein' as how I've nabbed a dragonball, already.."

She clears her throat. "A guy walks into a bar. Bartender asks him, 'What'll it be?' The guy asks, 'What's good here?'. The bartender says, 'Well, we got some really good punch. You gotta stand in line, though, it's pretty popular.' The guy looks around, but doesn't see a line."

Ryuko just.. stops talking, and crosses her arms.

Toph Beifong (20) has posed:
    Great, there is Vegeta. Toph does offer him a nod of her head as he speaks up. And uuuh oh, he didn't refer to her correctly... who knows what will happen?

    But Toph lets Granny Zam split them into the appropriate groups, though she is quick to reach out and tug Ryuko over with them. Then she waits, listening intently to hear the first challenge...

    What... the hell is this? Toph blinks, though she looks confused as she ponders this, reaching a hand up to rub at her chin. Okay. She has heard a few jokes... So she takes a deep breath. "Okay, there's this engineer who goes to Hell. Thing is, he is really brilliant and decides to fix all the stuff in Hell that is broken. The air condition, the freezers. A few days later Hell has become this really awesome place. God looks down into Hell and gets real upset and talks with the Devil, demanding that he is allowed to take the engineer up to Heaven..." Toph is already grinning at this point, holding up her hands, index fingers extended. And she even does her best to do a deep voice impression. "This guy obviously belongs up in Heaven, hand him over!" She changes her voice again, this time a bit squeaky. "No way, he's awesome! I'm keeping him!" Toph's voice once again goes slightly deeper. "If you don't send him up here I'll sue you!"

    She changes her voice one final time. "Good luck, I have all the lawyers!"

    Toph's grin is rather impish at this point as she waits for Granny Zam's response. And sure, she can't help but roll her eyes at Kilik's joke. And Vegeta's...? Man, that guy is something else.

Kyra Hyral (626) has posed:
    "...well now, that's certainly an interesting challenge." Kyra murmurs as she's herded over to the rest of the Union folks. As she moves, she plucks a cookie off her plate and passes the plate around to everyone here. "Hmmm...a joke huh. Let's see." The problem is she's afraid of telling one that nobody is going to get. So instead she goes for what is probably her /worst/ joke:

    "What did the Beastmaster say when he lost his dire wolf?"

    She waits a few seconds.

    "Where's my dire wolf?"

Dracula Vlad Tepes (83) has posed:
    Slogra and Gaibon are efficiently shuffled off to the Fed side, and when the challenge is issued, they immediately perk up. Yes, this is their time to shine! This is where they excel!

    The two demons take a moment to organize themselves, then Slogra clears his throat, standing up tall and proud. "Death had a real problem on his hands one time. The graveyards were overflowing. Bodies littered the walkways. Zombies shambled through the streets. Ghosts and restless spirits haunted people in their sleep. It was terrible, absolutely terrible!"

    Gaibon chimes in with a rumble. "So he starts thinkin' and thinkin', plannin' out what he's gonna do about this. He's gotta keep everything in order, you know? Eventually, though, he got this idea! He went right to work, makin' charts, gatherin' all the materials, pilin' things up. Death wiped the ghosty sweat from his brow as he hammered and nailed and sawed! Day and night he toiled, but finally, his work was complete."

    Slogra croaks dramatically next. "It was perfect! By the next day, there was a tall, tall fence around every graveyard, and every gate was locked tight with a special key only he had on him! And you know what? The problem stopped right then! No more bodies, no more zombies, no more ghosts; it was all spick and span. It turned out he had to put up those fences and lock them all up..."

    Then, in unison, they both shout, "...BECAUSE PEOPLE WERE DYING TO GET IN!"

    Their mouths hang open in silent anticipation of the laughter they will no doubt receive for this.

Taylita (180) has posed:
     Taylita smirks as Vegeta lands. "I guess 'royalty' think they can be late to anything." she says teasingly before realizing there is a spear in her face. She just snickers at Slogra. "I didn't mean good as in 'good in a fight'. I meant good like not evil." she says, casually pushing the spear away.

     The saiyan woman blinks in surprise at the first challenge. Does she even know any jokes? Wait! She does! Of course, not being originally from Earth, she doesn't know if it is a good one, she just knows she knows it. And she also knows that she really dislikes Vegeta's joke. She shakes her head at him. Yeah, she's not joining his empire any time soon.

     "Okay, so..." Taylita starts, "...these three strings are headed to a bar. They arrive and see a sign that says 'no strings allowed'. The first string ignores the sign and heads in while the other two wait to see what will happen. The first string goes to the bartender and asks for a drink. The bartender points to the sign and says, 'sorry, we don't serve drinks to strings here'. The string walks back out to the other two and huffs. 'He wouldn't serve me!'"

     "The second string goes in and again, the bartender turns the string away. The second string returns, just as frustrated as the first. Then, the third string gets an idea. He frays his ends, then loops himself around himself and pulls himself tight. Then...he heads inside."

     "The third string heads to the bar, and the bartender peers at him. 'I would like a drink.' the third string says. The bartender raises an eyebrow. 'Aren't you a string?' he asks. The string shakes his head and says..."

     "...nope. I'm a frayed knot."

Raditz (486) has posed:
    Raditz just listens to Vegetas joke, and shakes his head a little bit, "That's actually pretty funny..." He says with a smirk, before shaking his head and sucking his breath in as he braces himself. "Alright, Granny Zam..." He clears his throat.

    "I didn't always have the power I have today... Once upon a time I had a power level of something like a thousand... It's bigger than most humans, but pretty low in terms of Saiyan Standards." He grits his teeth, "Which is why I always hated the Saibamen. They were cultivated life forms that each had as the same power level as I did...."

    He grits his teeth, swallowing his pride as he speaks up and yells the punchline, "That's right... I was so weak, THEY COULD ACTUALLY GROW RADITZES!"

Noble Six (38) has posed:
        Oh no. She has to tell a joke. Does Noble Six even know what a joke is? If she doesn't, there's no expression on her face to be able to tell if she's nervous about this sort of thing. She stands there in silence while the others tell their jokes and stories, trying to think of something.

    Eventually she thinks of something. It's one she overheard some ODSTs telling each other a while back, and it actually got her to crack a smile. Eventually the SPARTAN speaks up.

    "A Marine Gunnery Sergeant is at a formal event and his CO takes him to meet three new officers. The CO introduces them, and the Gunny says to the three officers, 'I will bet you that I can guess how each of you became an officer.' The three Lieutenants look between each other and then smirk, 'Sure thing, Gunny.' says one of the three, as they wait for him to do his best."

    "The Gunny looks at the first officer, and rubs his chin for a second, 'Well, sir. You're in your early 20s and look like you're in good shape, so I'm going to say you went through ROTC after high school.' The officer raises his brows, looking impressed, 'Well that's right, Gunny.' He replies. The Gunny turns to the second officer and looks him over for a second, 'Sir, you're a bit older, so I'm going to say you were an enlisted man who became an officer through OCS.' The second officer nods enthusiastically, 'Damn, that's right Gunny. Two for two.'"

    "Finally, the Gunnery Sergeant turns to look at the third officer and says, 'And you sir, you must have gone to the Naval Academy.' The officer looks stunned, 'How could you possibly know that?' He asks angrily? The Gunny just grins, 'Saw your class ring while you were picking your nose.'"

Simon Petrikov (622) has posed:
The arrival of that Vegeta guy ratchets up Simon's tension even further. From what he has heard, the guy isn't big on non-violence or diplomacy. Being grouped up with their allies certainly helps matters, though. And Simon kind of thinks there might be a reason why they were divided so neatly (with the exception of Ryuko). Granny Zam examined everyone through a monocle. That monocle could have been for eye sight or it could have been for seeing something ABOUT them that isn't otherwise visible to the unaided eye. Ordinarily he might not have thought of that, but with his own changes to eyesight due to the Crown, 'seeing weird stuff' is something he's keenly aware of.

If she can see what kind of people they are already, or otherwise determine something about them, then trying to use dirty tricks or otherwise cheat the challenge would just plain be a bad idea. As well, he already agreed to treat the challenge with due respect, and he doesn't feel right about lying to or tricking some grandma. Whether she can see special stuff about them or not, it would be a jerk move to cheat their way to the Dragon Ball.So he tries to think of the best jokes he knows.

He knows jokes from dozens of different cultures, even an assortment of time periods. He feels he probably has some really good ones in his head somewhere. He smiles and lifts a hand, index finger raised... Only to lower the finger. "Uhh... I think I got one, uhh... Oh, yeah!" He lifts his finger again! ...And then lowers his hand entirely, using it stroke his white beard. "...Gimme a sec." He's trying to pull the memories out of his brain and they're not coming. "A rich man and a blonde are on a plane... Naw, not the right company. Three statisticians go duck hunting? No too complicated. Knock, knock. Who's there? Interrupting coefficient of friction?-Also too complicated." He's muttering under his breath as he tries to remember. There's jokes there, but no really good ones.

As everyone else tells their jokes, some of them quite distracting in their hilarity (or lack thereof) Simon is struggling with his own mind. Every time he seems about to tell one he stops, and has to wave off and ask for another minute. Finally, at the very end, when everyone else has gone, and his head is hurting with the effort, he decides to just pick one that he has always liked, and not try to appeal to the witch's own tastes or whatever. Trying to tell her what she wants to hear could also be a form of deception, and the old guy's head is hurting too much to think much deeper than that.

"Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson were going camping. They pitched their tent under the stars and went to sleep. Sometime in the middle of the night, Holmes woke Watson up and said: 'Watson, look up at the sky, and tell me what you see.' Watson replied: 'I see million and millions of stars.' Holmes said: 'And what do you deduce from that?' Watson replied: 'Well, if there are millions of stars, and if even a few of those have planets, it's quite likely there are some planets like Earth out there. And if there are a few planets like Earth out there, there might also be life.' And Holmes said: 'Watson, you idiot, it means that somebody stole our tent.'"

Then Simon just stuffs his hands in his pockets and waits.

Kirikou (127) has posed:
    This is beautiful. JOKES as a test of character! Kirikou's lifestyle is vindicated! And while some of the jokes get snickers only because of how bad they are, he genuinely appreciates the punny humour of several. Doesn't matter to him whether Union or Confederate. Or, indeed, the 'unaligned' person helping the Union. She gets a chortle too, and a quick one, making it obvious he caught the meaning instantly.

Mister Satan (TP) (Dropped) has posed:
Granny Zam pats Mihk on the forearm. "That's a very lovely story, dear, but not much of a joke. You're a sweet one, aren't you?" At least the witch seems to be appreciative, even if she isn't busting a gut.

Kilik, on the other hand...Granny Zam reels back and laughs helplessly for awhile after he's done. Oh those WITCHES and their DARK SENSES OF HUMOR -- of course she'd get a real kick out a child onion suffering harm in a terrible accident!

Meriax earns her own chortle. "What a cute joke," Granny Zam compliments the dragon. Another squint through the monocle is followed by an approving nod, presumably over the quality of Meriax's tail.

"Young man, you make no sense." Granny Zam peers up at Vegeta, and shakes her head. "If that was a joke, I'll eat my hat."

Ryuko's joke takes a minute to sink in, and when it does, Granny Zam doubles over. "Oh! Oh! Between that and the onion joke, it's a point for both sides for sure! The punch! The line! Kyeheheheheh!"

The tears can't even be wiped away before Toph steps up to perform. Granny Zam giggles and snorts and doubles again, smothering laughter under her hands.

Even Kyra -- whose joke is not the /best/ -- still gets a giggle. Granny Zam flashes her three remaining teeth at Kyra.

"KYAHAHAAH!" Slogra and Gaibon once again trip the witch's dark humor with their jokes about the graveyard. "Oh! Oh, let's give them one point, and another point for the dirt-covered girl...heeheehee!"

Taylita gets another guffaw. By this time, the witch is starting to wheeze. Unfortunately, Raditz takes some of the wind from her sails. Granny Zam gives Raditz an almost pitying look. "You're tall and handsome, but I think you're about as good a joke-teller as your friend over there." She gestures at Vegeta.

Noble Six gets the witch laughing again, at least. "Nose picking!! Kyeeehehehe!"

By the time Simon gets to deliver his joke, even the cat's doubled over, mewing and laughing as only a cat can. "Ohohoho, that's perfect! I think after everything's tallied, we have clear winners this time! Heeheehee -- Granny Zam declares that THIS team -- " She gestures at Raditz and his company. " -- is the winner of the first challenge!"

As she starts to clear her throat and cough away all the good humor from last round, she summons up a steaming mug from nowhere, and starts to drink from it. It smells weird, and a green foam sticks to her upper lip like an ugly froggish mustache. "For the second round, I want you to work together to put on a bit of a show. Here's how it works."

"You decide who starts. That lucky person steps forward, and describes for me the idiosyncrasies of the next person to perform. One or two traits will do, and the more amusing, the better. That next person in line will step forward, and act out those idiosyncrasies while introducing the next person, and so on and so forth, until you've gone through the entire team. This is supposed to be /funny/, so don't get too nasty, though that might be funny, too."

"I'll give you a moment to figure out who should go first."

Mister Satan (TP) (Dropped) has posed:
"ONE MORE THING," Granny Zam adds. "The last person in line must also describe the first person...who must come back out, and act out those traits, too." She pets her cat. "My mind is slipping in my old age..."

Toph Beifong (20) has posed:
    Okay, this is promising. It seems Granny Zam is a bit different... and she likes crude humour? And even nose picking? Man, maybe she has been going about this all wrong. It should be clear that Toph is relaxing a bit more when she realizes that there's no need to be all prim and formal. Whew!

    And she outright beams when the first point is awarded in their favour. "YES!" she exclaims, pumping her fist in the air. They are in the lead! Okay, what's next?

    Put on a show? Okay, this lady is definitively the good kind of crazy. So when the Union have decided on their course of action the blind earthbender raises her hand and steps forward. "I will begin, Granny Zam." With that she clears her voice and gestures to Kyra. "Come on out, overdramatic musical singer who can't carry a tune!"

    Why yes, the blind girl is smirking. Hopefully Kyra will be able to sell that and come up with something fun for Raditz!

Meriax (702) has posed:
Meriax's joke didn't go over well, but at least it wasn't horrible. Still, she'll have to do better if she wants any hope of winning! The fact that this is kind of a ludicrous situation is not lost on her, but she seems perfectly willing to play along. Maybe she thinks this is how humans often solve problems.

Meriax steps forward again, as the Confederacy has determined a simple way to determine order and she's the first one. She clears her throat. This causes some more smoke. She does not bother to introduce herself because, apparently, that comes later.

"This is Slogra," she says, pointing one big claw at him. "Slogra is..." Someone Meriax has never met before, so she's guessing. This may be /doomed to failure/ (or comedy). "Slogra is extremely competitive! And he is also... ah..."

Meriax struggles for a moment until she thinks of something. The light practically visiblry goes on. "And vain! So... cheer for him and his big beak!" He likes his beak, right? Meriax probably should have checked first.

Kyra Hyral (626) has posed:
    Despite her joke being pretty, pretty /bad/, so bad that Kilik might die a little on the inside, it still manages to get a little giggle from the witch. IT WILL HAVE TO DO. Satisfied, Kyra pumps a fist when the first point goes to them. Next up...

    The 'game' seems easy enough to follow, just describe the next person and the next person has to act it out, right? There's a bit of conferring amongst the group to determine an order for this next challenge and Kyra decides to volunteer to go next, meaning she's going to be the first to act something out. Then Toph lobs her 'traits' her way. There is a moment of hesitation, maybe a /look/ tossed Toph's way before she, with a flourish, brushes back her hoodie with both hands.

    One hand lifts, the back pressed against her pale forehead. Much to everyone's dismay, she sings. BADLY. Clearly a lot of effort is going into getting every note wrong which isn't that hard to accomplish since her own musical talent does not lie in actual singing, "Oooh the forest is alive and swarrrrrrrrming tonight, with Union and 'Fed Eliiiiiites~ But sit right THeeeEEERREEEe and don't go aaaaanywhere because up next weeee have a treaaaaaaat-"

    Looks like she's going to off-key sing the next introduction. "Though shy and demure, this astounding maaan knows how to carry a beaaaat-" She spins and gestures to Raditz with an overly dramatic flourish. "-a world-class break daaaancer, so sit baaaack and watch his feeeet~"

    She grins and spins out of the way.

Laer (353) has posed:
    Like the other Confederates, Laer is here to show her appreciation for Serori. This may explain why the member of the confederacy who almost certainly has the most experience at this sort of performance is in fact rather late to turn up for it, a portal of light and song bursting up to allow her through.

    She's dressed up for the occasion, though, in a courtly black evening gown, so deeply black that it actively seems to suck the light out of the area around her. She'll be looking for someone to explain what they're doing.

Dracula Vlad Tepes (83) has posed:
    Slogra and Gaibon, remarkably, have their eel-like stare answered! It's a miracle! But things are moving along, and now Slogra's found his place right after Meriax in this strange, strange competition. Competitive? Vain? Well...he can do that.

    Good thing his player realized that he should retroactively be wearing D's clothing for this. Sure, he looks ridiculous in that foreboding hat and billowing black cloak tucked up around his serpentine neck, but there are few better baselines for 'competitive' and 'vain.' Sick burns, even in narrative.

    The bird-lizard-thing leaps forward, black cloak billowing, hat nearly fluttering off his skeletal head before his hand snaps up to catch it and flip it down in a dramatic tilt over one vacant blue eye. "PEONS!"

    Suddenly, with a flourish, he brandishes...a hand mirror, strangely suited for his size. As he croaks, he tilts his head and twists his body into various awkward, "flattering" poses, all the while keeping his gaze on the mirror. He looks completely, utterly stupid. "While /nobody/ could ever possibly hope to match my INCREDIBLE, SOUL-RENDING BEAUTY - look at that! Look at that glorious /beak/! - I will nonetheless introduce...the dashing!" He swishes his tail. "The dimwitted!" He hurls the mirror aside. It probably smacks Gaibon in the face, but Slogra keeps on with his bizarre posing for every word. "The unnecessarily acrobatic, excessively loud, sadly limited in vocabulary, sure to ruin your every single hope of victory ON THIS BLOODSTAINED FIELD OF BATTLE -"

    Finally, Slogra hefts up his spear, whirling around in a blinding flourish of black cloth to point it right at Kirikou. "KIIIIRIIIIKOOOOUUU!"

    He then produces another hand mirror and gazes into it soulfully and adoringly before flouncing back into place.

Mister Satan (TP) (Dropped) has posed:
So far, Granny Zam seems to be enjoying the show! Anticipation dances in her beady little witchy eyes as Toph steps forward. When Toph introduces Kyra as a bad singer, the old witch braces herself (and her ears) for what's next. And yes, that bracing is needed! Badly! Kyra's shrill, off-key vocals fluff out the black cat's fur and almost crack Granny Zam's monocle. Kyra's given full applause, however. It was a dedicated performance.

Once that's over with, she turns to see what horrors will be visited on her senses by Slogra and his faaabulous beak. Meriax gets a lot of points just for trying.

Mister Satan (TP) (Dropped) has posed:
"Wait now, who's this!" Granny Zam notices (because the player just noticed) that a new figure's entered the game. The witch gives Laer a close look. "Finally, someone dressed properly for once! Whoever you are, I like your style! Join a team! Probably.../that/ team, if I'm any good at guessing."

Zam gestures at the Confederates.

Raditz (486) has posed:
    Before he knows it, Raditz is up next, and after a bit of coaching from his team, he steps on up and proceeds to throws himself into a flipping summersault, landing himself on the ground with a roll, proceeding to spin about on his back, keeping up some momentum before vaulting himself back into a hand stand.

    He spins a bit on his hands before dropping down in an almost axe-kick like motion, and before flipping back up to his feet and proceeding to rap, though he clearly is having trouble keeping it in a rhythm...

    "For our next trick, you get to see, someone who's not exactly, what you see... Under the Skin, she's a killer robot that wants to meet ya, and she's crazy for... Flames... It's Taylita!"

    With that, he sort of Dance Fights he way back, making his way to allow for Taylita to step up.

Kirikou (127) has posed:
    Kilik winces hard at Kyra's singing, like her joke, but he hasn't stopped finding the whole situation amusing and perhaps a bit ridiculous. So he's quite amused by the time Slogra presents him. Kirikou's got no warning of what Slogra's about to call out, and it's probably a good thing. He'd punch the bird-lizard... or maybe not. He DOES have a sense of humour though, and an eye for the dramatic. Quickly realizing he's supposed to ham up the traits described, he draws himself up to his full height.

    Now, one thing to note is Kilik's a habitual sloucher. He gains a good two or three inches by straightening up, and is revealed to be fairly tall. Two traits. Well, some of what was said was repetitive, so it should be easy enough.

    "Uuuuuuh, whaaaaat?" he says, drawing out the words with a dull slur. "You calliiiin' me stu... stu... stu... dumb?" he asks. "Least I can DAAAAANCE." he adds, breaking into a quick spin. Shuffling step, swing on a tree branch, dismount, twirl, pivot, diving handstand. He'd do a full-on acrobatic floorshow but they're on dirt. It just doesn't seem right.

    Finally popping up and taking an overly dramatic flourishing bow, he points to Vegeta. And freezes, apparently too dim-witted to come up with an actual two word description of the man.

    There are of course soooo many traits Kilik could use to describe Vegeta. Some of which would piss the Prince off, no doubt. Then again, one of those traits would almost certainly be 'angry'. So, would it be strategic to make the second trait as offensive as possible? Obnoxious? Foolish? Arrogant? Hmmm. Well okay, those might apply. Prideful? Certainly, but it's a bit weak. The thing is not only to win this competition, but Kilik needs to figure out how to survive retaliation later. While he's not afraid of Vegeta and would take him on in the ring any time, it's never a good idea to outright offend your allies, especially not such a strong and valuable Confederate soldier. So, what to pick? "Uuuuuuh.... Angry little man." he says finally, apparently with great intellectual effort. "And arrow... arrow... pointy thing... big ego!" Kilik finally calls out.

Vegeta (663) has posed:
"You're an angry little man, you insufferable insect!" It's difficult to tell if Vegeta is acting, as he immediately heads over to a tree, wraps his arms around it, then tugs it out of the ground over his head. He seems as if he's about to bat Kilik with it. "How dare you make fun of the Prince of all Saiyans in this humiliating stand-off of comedy! I could squash you with this entire tree! When this is over, you -will- apologize, and you will know your place, child!"

He raises the tree even higher, firing little lasers from his finger to get the branches off and turn it into a massive sharpened stick. "Know now that I could have tossed this directly through him and impaled his entire body, but in my infinite benevolence, I allowed him to live!"

He starts to swing it down, then points it at Gaibon with both hands. "You! Magical princess school girl who is late for class!" he decides, tossing the sharpened tree away.

Taylita (180) has posed:
     Taylita winces and covers her ears as Kyra sings, and lets out a breath of relief when it is over. Then, Raditz does...whatever that was that he did. It wasn't bad, actually, but his rapping could use some work. And...wait, what?!

     A robot that loves fire? Really? Well, she does know a lot about robots. And she did see something on a show one time. TV, the best source for inaccurate information! So, when Taylita is introduced, she doesn't saunter or walk onto the scene.

     She robots. She tries to make her movements as quick and jerky as possible, with sudden stops and just as sudden starts. Even her tail doesn't say as usual. It moves in a steady wave-like motion.

     She steps forward, her joints bent at near 90 degree angles, then stops in front of Granny Zam. "Hello! I am Taylita!" she says in an exagerated monotone voice, holding out a hand toward Granny Zam for a handshake. But, about half way through it, her arm 'breaks' at the elbow. She twists her upper arm so that it looks like the lower arm just stopped working and is dangling now. She stares at it, then reaches over with her other hand and fiddles with the 'broken' arm, apparently fixing it. But, as she is, she 'accidentally' fires a beam from her 'repaired' hand, catching herself in the hair. Which, subsequently, bursts into flame.

     "Oooooh. Pretty." she says, then smiles at Granny Zam. "Is fire not pretty?" she says, even as her hair burns down to leave her bald-headed and very shiny-looking. Practically a chrome dome. Perfect for a robot. She bows to Granny Zam, possibly blinding her with the reflection off her head.

     "As I do not wish to claim the entire day, I will no introduce my comrade, Simon, the forgetful, over-eager magician!" she says in her monotone voice, then heads back toward her group. As she is walking away, she continues the almost stop-motion animation movement.

Mister Satan (TP) (Dropped) has posed:
Granny Zam is strangely bewildered by Slogra's show of arrogance. The outfit he's /somehow/ wearing only goes further to enhance the creature's antics. Who else but someone obsessed with appearances would dress in something so ridiculous, yet fashionable? Such exquisite taste! And what an exquisite beak!

Maybe Granny Zam needs to get out of her candy house a bit more.

When Raditz comes out dance-fighting, though, she puts up her own dukes and mimes a few punches back at him, delighted. After he tries to rap, she lets out her 'kyeheheh' of laughter, and claps him off the impromptu stage.

Kilik's 'village idiot' routine gets Granny Zam doubling over again. "Look at him!" She points a gnarled finger at Kilik, trying to get her cat to pay attention. "What a moron!"

Vegeta is...well, he's Vegeta. He's remarkable, and more than a little terrifying. For a moment, the witch is drooling over daydreams of her extradimensional stew, but since it just seems to be part of the game, she gives Vegeta the leeway he needs to perform. And the way he hooks in his next teammate is entertaining enough to get her laughing.

"Oh, look, kitty! It's a robot!" Granny Zam cackles, and fixes her monocle back into place.

It's then that Taylita burns off her own hair for the sake of the mission.

Granny Zam's monocle pops out in kind of a zwee! of surprise.

"What a dedicated young woman..."

Dracula Vlad Tepes (83) has posed:
    Gaibon stares at Vegeta as if he would really like to set him on fire, but he doesn't. For now. Instead, the lumbering mass of blue muscle trudges forward...and, very conveniently, trips over a large rock, flailing his wings and landing flat on his face with a howl.

    Quickly, the gargoyle lifts his head and stumbles to his feet, then opens his mouth - and pauses. A frown creases his stone-like features, and then he speaks in a high-pitched yet strangely gravelly voice, all while daintily poking his wing claws together. "Oh dear! This is such a horrible morning! I, Magical Girl Gaibon-Chan, just woke up only five minutes ago, and now I have to introduce-"

    The demon flutters, lifting his wings to his mouth as he turns to look over at Laer. "Oh, there she is! Our very own ever-smiling ballerina, Laer-sempai! I so hope she notices me today!" The sound he makes next sounds like he's trying to the best of his ability to make a high-pitched squeal, but it probably sounds closer to a pig being murdered. He does, however, turn a very vibrant shade of red. All over. Is that supposed to be flustered blushing?

    "-oh no, I almost forgot," he suddenly squeaks. "Magical Girl Gaibon-Chan, awaaaaay!"

    A trail of "glitter" follows after Gaibon (actually just embers trailing from the corners of his mouth) as he "flutters" (actually awkwardly flaps) back to his place in line, returning to a very angry glower once he settles in again.

Simon Petrikov (622) has posed:
Everyone has been bringing their all to this competition! Even the Confederates! Even Raditz! ...Maybe not Vegeta, but Simon doesn't know him well enough to tell if that's his normal behavior or not. From what he's hearing on the radio, it's not much of a stretch. Taylita's display is dedicated - if horrific - but then it's Simon's turn. But not before he has to deal with a different kind of horror, courtesy of Gaibon.

The 47-years old man steps forth, determined to do his best, and win the Dragon Ball. And he starts by saying, "Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson were going camping. They pitched their tent under the stars and went to sleep. Sometime in the-Wait. What was the challenge again?" Simon scratches his head, then pulls out a thick book from inside of his jacket. It has a skull on the front, and a bird with grapes, and a sword, and shields, and several small gemstones in a ring around all of that. At the top of the cover is the word 'Enchiridion'. "Man, to the Nightosphere with this challenge. I'm just going to teleport the Dragon Ball somewhere safe and out of the hands of ALL these people! The Enchiridion is a book full of all kinds of magic. I've been studying it intently, and I'm pretty sure I have COMPLETELY MASTERED THE ARTS OF EL SORCERIE!"

He flips open the book dramatically, raises a hand above his head and says, "Sorry, folks! Simon says: This challenge is over!" The pages flip rapidly in a sudden wind, as he wiggles his fingers and starts to chant magic works in the most magical of all languages: Piglatin. "Ragond Allb Restop Angeoch!" There is a dramatic silence.

Nothing happens.

"Wait, that was the wrong spell. One sec." He flips through the pages manually until he finds the right one. "Ah, here we are! Synchronous time dialations through a non-local region of space-time! I'll open a portal and the Dragon Ball will fall right through! So long, bloodsuckers!" Then he thrusts his fingers towards Granny Zam's candy house and shouts, "SHAZAM!" Nothing happens. He tries again. "ABRAKADABRA!" He switches the book to his other hand, and shifts his stance a bit, then thrusts his free out out palm up. "GO WEB!"

Still notta'.

"...Uhh, while I remember how the spell goes, this foul-mouthed soccer hooligan will stall for time!" Then he backs up, still scrutinizing the text in his hands.

Laer (353) has posed:
    Laer flatly pauses for a moment. Not so much for the smiling part as that he's just identified her as a ballerina and she's wearing an evening gown that is not particularly loose and goes down to around her ankles. That is not going to be happening for a couple of reasons.

    She'll plant a smile on her face, though, and with a sweeping motion of her arms and walking on the tips of her toes she'll make her way forward. She distinctly does not appear to notice Gaibon as she does so.

    "Aah. Distinguished lady, I'm afraid it's my profound displeasure to have to introduce our final member, the first and the last, the beginning and the end, the occasional firebug, Meriax. Please forgive our rudeness, but she's really not able to keep her voice volume steady, and her obsession with fire is under control by therapy. Sometimes. In any case, I shall go get the fire department ready, just in case."

    With that, she'll withdraw back towards the back of the line, hopefully before Meriax decides to start her fire spree with the graceful elf.

Meriax (702) has posed:
Dragons are known for their pride, but apparently Meriax is not too proud to play along. Being young helps. Sure, she wants to be taken seriously - but more importantly, she wants to be /needed/. She is, after all, if not a kid, not really an adult, even if she's probably one of the older people in the area. Granny Zam exempted, of course.

Meriax actually takes off solely so she can land dramatically again, beating her wings hard enough to kick up some dust. She exhales a long stream of fire... straight up, which has the multiple advantages of being visible from a long way away, looking fairly impressive, and not actually igniting any trees. She just dropped through that gap, after all; it's certainly big enough for her to exhale through.

It sure is warm if you're close to her, though.

"YES," Meriax says, raising her voice. "I AM MERIAX, THE GREAT DRAGON! AND TOGETHER, WE ARE ...Team C." That last was quite a bit quieter than the rest. It raises again: "AND THAT... IS THAT!"

She doesn't bow. She's not really built for it. Her mouth shifts slightly, though; she's definitely grinning.

Noble Six (38) has posed:
    Oh man, this is going to be interesting. Noble Six takes a moment to compose herself, as she prepares herself to be a soccer hooligan. She at least know what that is, so it should be interesting enough for her to try this.

    Getting her mind in the right place, she decides to do just what she was told, and stall for time, as she moves towards Granny Zam, and she seems to already be glaring at the old lady, "You wot, mate?!" Six calls out, doing her best to sound upset when she's not really, "I swear on me mum, I'ma punch you in the gob!" She shakes her fist threateningly at Granny, "I gotsta make sure the fuckin' old timer's got more fuckin' time cause he can't 'member shit!"

    "Oi, how'mi gonna get this cheeky fucker more time when she's over there, bein' the fuckin' President of the United States with a stutter?!" Yes, Six knows Ryuko is not American and therefore can't be the President, but lets see how much they teach them about the USA in her school.

Mister Satan (TP) (Dropped) has posed:
"What kind of excuse for magic is that?" Granny Zam brandishes her broom in Simon's direction. "You be careful mucking around with sorcery willy-nilly, before you turn your friends into newts and your enemies into tigers! I could use some new newts for my pond, but I want 'em to be genuine newts, not this polymorphized mumbo-jumbo!"

Simon's not actually /struck/, though. Gaibon cuts in with his smoldery 'sparkles', and captures Granny's attention. Soon, she's back to cackling and wheezing. "Look at you! Falling over yourself like that!"

Then, the cat mrrrowrs as Laer ballerinas herself onto the scene, and Granny Zam hoots and claps. "And a graceful one, too!" Granny Zam must be from an older era, and not just because she looks like a dried-up prune. Laer gets a lot of appreciation just on looks and grace. "And -- oh my, another fire-lover? I hope this one keeps her hair! Kyeheheheh!"

Now, soccer may not be as big a sport on Earth-4555 as it is on other Earths, but it /is/ known, so Zam knows plenty about soccer /hooligans/. She looks to Noble Six with real interest, but soon recoils from all those smoldering curse words. Six could peel the paint off the walls -- I mean the LEGITIMATE CANDY COATING. Granny Zam giggles and pets her cat, and basks in the warmth radiating from Meriax.

"I see someone knows how to handle her firebreath," she chortles.

Ryuko Matoi (140) has posed:
    Ryuko just.. tilts her head. ".. Who?" She gives Noble Six a confused look. "I have no fuckin' clue who I'd be tryin' to imitate there, dude."

She shrugs, "Whatever." She gestures to Toph, "She's dirty as hell, and she doesn't need to put any effort into it. Seriously, a bath? What's that?"

Ryuko rubs her chin. "Kinda wonder what she'd be like, if she wasn't so nasty. You know. Like, a princess or some shit."

Toph Beifong (20) has posed:
    It's easy to tell that Kyra is getting the physical acting down, with exagerrated hand movements even. Good. And wow, she really succeeds in selling bad singing. Yes, Toph has to reach her hands up to cover her ears, but even so she's still grinning. If not a bit painfully.

    And when her fellow Unionites follow suit, the blind girl does look amused, taking in everything with her feet. Heck, she has to admit that even the Feds are funny... but let's hope they can still win Granny Zam over! So Toph waits, eager for her turn to do something silly. After all those years being a professional earthbending fighter at Earth Rumble VI she does have a taste for drama and showmanship.

    Though she can't help but frown at Ryuko. She doesn't know what a president is...? The blind girl huffs a bit, her expression determined as she adjusts her posture, standing straight and narrowing her eyes in what would be a disapproving glare as if she was able to look at them. "We are most disappointed in your lack of theatrical prowess, /peasant/!" Toph says with a clear and loud voice, her pronounciation clear and a bit different than most people should be used to. Though acting like this is a piece of cake thanks to her upbringing, which most of them might not be fully aware of.

    "By royal decree I declare that you would do well in expanding your political and cultural tastes in order to appear less of a buffoon. You are embarrassing Us," Toph continues, gesturing to herself as she moves her right hand to rest her finger tips gently against her sternum, clearly talking about herself and not the Union at large. "Why, We ought to remind you that We, Princess Rockella the IVth have never heard such insolence before in Our life!" With that she tips her head back, as if looking down her nose at Ryuko. Hmph!

Mister Satan (TP) (Dropped) has posed:
"Hmm." Granny Zam squints at Ryuko's...performance..."I don't know what President of the United States is either, but your attitude needs adjusting. Kitty, take a note."

The cat does not take notes.

The cat licks its nose.

Toph comes out swinging, though. "Rockella the Fourth, indeed! Why, I almost believe you're as snooty as you're pretending to be! Kyeheheh!"

"I'm giving this round to TEAM TWO! If only because that trick with the tree was interesting." A nod to Vegeta. "Oh, and that 'magical girl' bit was spectacular! However, a half point is being awarded to the other team, because someone sacrificed her own pretty hair to convince me she was no more than a crazy robot."

Pause. "Maybe she IS a crazy robot..."

"AND NOW! WE MUST HAVE A TIE-BREAKER!" Again, the tinny little fanfare blasts out of nowhere, and the cat YOWLS to celebrate. "Another game of performances, but this time...you must keep it a secret, and someone else has to figure out your secret! You there! Elegant woman in the dress! You will guess for Team Two. And you, the old wizard man! You will guess for Team One!"

She claps her hands together. "Kitty will hand out the roles."

Granny Zam upends her hat, pulls out a fistful of paper scraps, shoves these into her cat's mouth, and sends him around to each team's performers.

Mister Satan (TP) (Dropped) has posed:
Granny Zam sits back to watch the deciding challenge unfold. The cat returns to her with less paper in its mouth. It spits the remains back into her hat, and Granny Zam puts her hat back onto her head.

Kirikou (127) has posed:
    Kilik takes his 'role' from the kitty with a dubious motion, apparently not entirely trusting black cats. Still, he grins when he reads it. THIS he can do. And it ought to be fun!

    So, he stomps over to Toph. And yes, he stomps hard. Like, almost crater-hard. "Heya dirtbender!" he greets. Then, when he's close to her, towering over her, he lowers his head in her direction, talking directly at her when he speaks next. "OR SHOULD I CALL YOU ROCKELLA?" he cries out, aiming the volume of his voice downward. Not ear-piercingly loud. He even spares her his full volume, fortunately, but he spares no effort to seem like he's trying to shout at the top of his lungs. It's still pretty loud, even so. "YOU WERE PRETTY GOOD!" he bellows.

Simon Petrikov (622) has posed:
Well, seems like everything has been going well! ...Or not, because Team Two got it! Nuts! This next challenge is... Ringing bells for Simon, oddly enough. This setup is kind of... Familiar. Like he's seen something like it before? He stuffs the Enchiridion back into his jacket, but whatever he's remembering is tossed aside by the realization he needs to bring his A-game to ensure a victory. He doesn't have time to waste! So he steps forward, stroking his chin, and says, "Gee, I hope this party is a success. It was an open-invite so who knows who might show up?" Then he moves around mimeing setting up chips and drinks and stuff.

It wasn't part of the instructions for the guesser to get involved, but maybe it will net them some bonus points.

"...Wow, the neighbors sure are loud." he mentions at Kirikou's yelling. "I wonder if they're having a party too."

Vegeta (663) has posed:
Vegeta flexes as he receives his role, then suddenly reaches for that tree he tossed aside, and hurls it into the air. That's when he fires a ball of energy up at it, and simply makes it explode into pieces of fiery wood falling from the sky.

"Everyone get out of the way!" he yells, then reaches into his armor and pulls out a capsule, tossing it. Then with a poof of a cloud, it creates a hot tub. "Move, before they hit the ground and set everything on fire!"

That's when he runs to the tub and starts tossing water at the pieces of flaming wood, putting each one out before it hits the ground.

Kyra Hyral (626) has posed:
    Kyra takes the damp paper from the cat and stares at it. She looks up and /stares/ at the cat. "...seriously?" she mutters, "Well. Okay then, be right back." She takes a few short steps into the woods, snatching up a discarded stick.

    When she returns, she is hobbling along, hunched over to roughly the witch's height and using the stick for support. She moves slowly but with purpose as she totters around the clearing where everyone else is standing around and acting out their own ridiculous roles. "Oh excuse me...pardon me." Her voice sounds mock thin and reedy now.

    But at least she's not SINGING this time!!

    As she wanders around, she pauses, circles around Simon and stares at something out of sight for him. "Oh my. Very nice, dearie, for a boney wizard. Keep up the good work, sonny boy!" Kyra smiles then hobbles off elsewhere.

    Kilik is the next to get inspected from behind. "Ooh. Very firm, very taut. You obviously work out, young man."

Toph Beifong (20) has posed:
    Damn! Toph frowns when the Feds get the point for this one, though she does offer a brief punch to Taylita's arm for at least giving them half a point. But still, another challenge? Fine. Toph nods her head again, looking even more determined.

    When she is given a piece of paper though she blinks, then grumbles and searches through her satchel hanging off of her shoulder. What is she looking for? It's a very stylish glove! And why, it looks like Stark tech. It's put on her left hand, and she runs her fingers over the piece of paper, her face one of concentration. Soft clicking sounds come from the glove, and as her fingers move over the paper... she arches an eyebrow. "The crud...?"

    Fine.

    The glove is taken off and put back in her satchel. And she's just about to start her act when Kilik stomps over, and she blinks, closing one eye as he seems intent on yelling into her ear. "Sheesh, I'm blind, not deaf!" she hisses at him and moves her arm with the intent of hitting him in the abdomen with her elbow. Act over at your own part!

    Then Toph clears her voice before she leans over, placing her left hand on her lower back, her right hand extended as if she is supporting herself on something. Then she begins stepping forward, speaking in a shrill voice. "Oh, is this the bus to the bingo? These eyes are not what they used to be... Oh? They really have strange seats here..."

    The blind girl crouches down as if she is sitting, turning her head this way and that. All before she begins walking forward, gradually crouching less and less. "Driver? Did you leave the window open? It's rather drafty! What is... AAAAAH!" Here the blind girl raises her arms, flailing as she stands at her full height, leaning over on one leg. "Driver! I lost my handbag! AAAAH THIS ROAD IS TOO BUMPY!" Suddenly Toph jerks herself over to the other side as she rushes forward, leaning forward before she leans back, all the time screaming and having a scared look on her face as she runs around in circles.

Meriax (702) has posed:
Meriax suddenly looks directly at Toph. Just... staring.

/Hmm/. If she captures a princess, is that what she's going to have to put up with? Maybe she'll have to think of a Plan B.

But Plan C involves Team C. Meriax accepts the scrap of paper from the cat. She has to hold it extremely delicately between two of her claws to avoid putting a hole in it, and squint to read it, but read it she does - and then she turns away from the crowd. "..." But she can do this. There might be /fabulous prizes/. And it's just for a little more. She thinks she knows what one of these are... she's seen them. Once. On the television.

Meriax is kind of sheltered.

Meriax walks a few steps off and uses one of her feet to dig at the ground. She picks out two of the biggest fallen branches she can find and uses her hands to hold them against her sides, tucking her 'elbows' against her flank. She wanders toward Laer, the designated guesser.

"It's too hot here," she complains, immediately, when Vegeta explodes some wood. "Spring is too hot and so is raining flaming splinters, for me and my kind cannot live here!" She keeps walking, hunching down further with every step. She drops one of the sticks. "Alas! For I am dead, until I am remade in winter!" Meriax drops the other stick, tilting dangerously to one side. Then she...

...well, she faceplants in the clearing. Thump. So much for draconic dignity. Then again, she's not the only one making a fool of herself, so it's okay.

Dracula Vlad Tepes (83) has posed:
    Slogra and Gaibon both pick up their notes as the cat walks by...and stare, their looks ones of abject horror and deep-seated confusion. They sigh, weary and long-suffering, then Slogra steps up to do his part.

    His tail wraps around his waist. He fluffs up his collar. The hat is tossed aside. The robes are sent to billow out around him. He clears his throat, then, as his clawed hand is propped on a bony hip at a jaunty, sassy angle, he speaks in a really, really bad high-pitched voice.

    "Giiiiirl, I say, boy over /there/ needs to get hisself together." A tut, a sideways jerk of the head as Slogra points over at Kilik. "I mean, really. Those colors, in this season? Why, I never! I'd be rippin' that filth off and stuffin' him in a good ol' sundress if I had my say in the world, I'll tell you that. Lawdy, what's the world comin' to these days, that people can walk out like /that/?" Another scoff before Slogra pulls out /another/ mirror and starts to brush up his cheeks with his fingertips.

    Gaibon, meanwhile, lumbers up to Taylita. His wings are lifted as he pinches his wing claws together and swishes his short tail up and down behind him, all the while trying to lay flat and looking up at Taylita with pleading eyes. He's still bright red, too. "Please, ma'am, you gotta let me go! I got a wife and kids, a whole little clutch of 'em, all waitin' for me to get home!" More wing claw movement, more tail swishing. "I'll give ya a wish, too! One free wish, whatever you want, just don't dunk me in there! Wishes don't work when I'm dead! I-I'll even give you my tail if you leave the rest, I swear! That's the best, isn't it? ISN'T IT?!"

Taylita (180) has posed:
     Taylita smirks as she is given half a point for her antics. Which is...somehow not enough to win. She sighs softly at the decision for a tie-breaker, then waits for the cat to get to her. She takes her piece of paper, reads it over, and her face scrunches up as she tries to think of the best way to act it out.

     Pretend. A piece of advice she got from her fellow not-evil saiyan. She considers. Pretending...she could pretend she is talking to someone, pretend she...

     Yes, that's it!

     Taylita walks into the 'scene' and pushes an invisible doorbell. "Dingdong!" she says. She waits to be allowed in, then smiles. "Hi there, Simon! This seems like a great party!" Then, she makes a phone ringing sound. She blinks as if surprised, then puts her hand in the form of a finger phone to her head, her thumb at her ear and her pinky at her mouth. "Oh, hello doctor." Pause. "...wh...what do you..." Pause again. "...but...but that's so soon! How will I enjoy this party?!" She hangs up, then looks around frantically. Then, she runs toward the kitchen and comes back. "An egg timer! This should help!" She holds it up, then turns the invisible dial a quarter of the way around. "ticktickticktick..." she says aloud, then she starts running around frantically. She runs up to Toph! "It is so nice to meet you, Princess Rockella!" she says in the most rushed voice ever. Then, she dashes off for Kyra and quickly shakes her hand. "Sonicetomeetyou!"

     Then, she is approached by Gaibon. She blinks as he pleads with her, then gasps! "A wish! A free wish if I let you go! Then, fine, I won't eat you! You a-"

     She suddenly stops talking and makes a 'ding!' noise, then hrks and bends forward at the waist as if in terrible pain. "...oh no...n-not fast...goodbye cruel world...!" She flops forward atop Gaibon, eyes closed and limbs dangling 'lifelessly'.

Laer (353) has posed:
    Laer seems a little concerned with having to be the guesser. But she'll work at it, moving around, starting with Vegeta. "Hi, Mister Really ineffective firefighter, there. One who starts fires." This may or may not be sufficiently correct, but she's goes to keep considering as Meriax makes her way there.

    "Snow-person Dragon, it's not cold enough for you here." She declares, continuing.

    Gaibon she decides right away. "Hostage genie dragon, make a break for it. Preferably before the Fashion Policewoman there gets you."

Kirikou (127) has posed:
    Kilik turns to look at Simon, grinning at the blue pointy man. "Oh yeah, they're pretty loud." he says in a perfectly normal tone of voice. "BUT NOT AS LOUD AS THEY NORMALLY ARE!" he adds, looking down and stomping hard for emphasis. STOMP STOMP STOMPY MCSTOMP.

Simon Petrikov (622) has posed:
Simon feigns patience as though used to dealing with a certain behavior, and incoporates his guess into his response, "Uh... Thank you, Betty. You're as much of a diry old woman as ever, huh? Heh. But I HAVE been lifting a lot of tomes lately, and I'm glad you could make it to the party!" He looks up in startlement when Toph runs around screaming. "Does your finicky senior citizen friend need some help out here? I know she has special needs and-" Simon turns when he hears the 'ding dong', and moves to 'open' the 'door'.

"Hey, there! I'm glad you could-" he pauses as Taylita is on the phone, arching his brows and moving out of the way. "Is everything okay?" he asks in a concerned voice. Taylita hurries around greeting everyone, and Simon follows after her, until suddenly Taylita collapses. "No! NO!" Simon runs forward, skidding on his knees, as he scoops up the saiyan in his arms and says, "It can't be! I knew you were terminally ill, but how could this happen so suddenly!? This can't be happening! I refuse to accept it!"

Then he throws his head back and yells, "Nooooooooo!"

Toph Beifong (20) has posed:
    "HELP ME YOUNG MAN! This strange bus goes all up and down and around and around! And the seat is sticky!" Toph wails, her voice shaking as she teeters over on one leg. And then she comes to a stop, leans over and makes gagging sounds, pretending like she is throwing up. "Oooh so dizzyyy..." Then she falls over onto her side. "Help, I have fallen and I can't get uuuuuup!"

    Yes, Toph is milking this for all it's worth.

Laer (353) has posed:
Laer will turn towards Kilik, as he starts to pitch a fit. "Oh, it's mister Manchild throwing a temper tantrum! ...Why did we invite these people, again?" She asks, because many of them are not great guests.

Kyra Hyral (626) has posed:
    "Can't keep a good woman down." Kyra chirps gleefully at Simon the host before tottering off.

    "You know, kids these days don't wear enough form-fitting coveralls." Kyra's voice suddenly croaks out from behind Vegeta. She sidesteps around him, claps him on a shoulder with tears shining in her eyes. "Thank you, sonny, I can die happy now."

Mister Satan (TP) (Dropped) has posed:
Granny Zam's delighted by the party. As each guest arrives, PROVING THEIR CHARACTER by acting out their unique, bizarre roles, she about collapses into giggles, snorts, wheezes, chokes, gasps, laughs, chortles, chuckles, and fully-belly guffaws. Oh, but the cat's not as amused. He's still scraping paper off his tongue.

The time comes for scoring.

Granny Zam gets up, and looks between the two guessers, nodding in thought.

"That right there is a fireman desperate to save everyone." She points at Vegeta. "You did get the firefighter part right, so...I'd say that's a point for Team Two." Ding.

"As for that one, she's a melting snowman. A cantankerous one." Zam points to Meriax. "Your guess was close enough, so that's another point." Ding.

"This young lady here is actually an old woman with a determined interest in hindquarters." Zam pats Kyra on the shoulder, and winks as she adds in a stage whisper, "At least you know your stuff!" Then, in a proper volume: "Calling her a dirty old woman is close enough. That's a point for Team One." Ding!

"And you also got it right that this poor girl had only a short time to live." Zam points to Taylita. "Another point." Ding!

"Mm...but I'm afraid that's not a manchild having any tantrum. Why, he's just got it out for the downstairs neighbor. No points on that guess." Granny nods at Kilik, and continues ambling around the group.

"Unfortunately, that's also not a hostage genie dragon. That's a lobster trying to escape from getting boiled. But you were close with the 'fashion policewoman'...who's really a drag queen with attitude, so I'll give you half a point for it." Flat ding.

Granny Zam shuffles back toward the house. "And that's not a special needs grandmother!" Hooking her thumb toward Toph points out who she means. "Why, that's a poor old lady who's ended up on a rollercoaster! Don't you know how often this happens?" Tsking and head-shaking follows.

"With three and a half points total for Team One, and three and a half points total for Team Two, I guess I'll just have to give this Dragon Ball to the team who I thought put their most into it. The team with the most character and personality, and the right spirit I like." Granny Zam pulls her hat off her head, reaches into it, makes a show of digging around, and then pulls out...a one-star Dragon Ball.

She tosses that at Kyra. "There you go, kid. If you ever want Granny Zam to do you any favors ever again, REMEMBER THE PRICE. Now all of you leave. AND DON'T EAT MY HOUSE!"

Door slam.

Taylita (180) has posed:
     Taylita suddenly 'wakes up' in Simon's arms, then laughs triumphantly! "Hahaha! Take that, Confederacy! Your dedication and acting skills just can't measure up!" And, without really thinking about it, she gives Simon a big kiss before hopping out of his arms. "Too bad. That lobster look soooo tasty." she says, grinning at Gaibon and licking her lips. Then...she moves to protect Kyra. Because she isn't so certain that the Confederates will just let them leave.

Meriax (702) has posed:
Meriax picks herself out of the dirt when Granny Zam slams the door closed.

She dusts herself off, because she has leaves stuck to her scales. This takes a few moments. "She doesn't know draconic majesty when she sees it," Meriax grumbles, before she affixes a greedy eye on Kyra. She exhales...

...smoke. Nothing but a puff of smoke. It doesn't even get all the way to Kyra. "Take your prize and run," she says, "but never forget that I, the great dragon Meriax, is magnanimous even in the face of a biased judge who doesn't even know that the best person to give a Dragon Ball to is a dragon!" She might have done more, but, well... she was told not to.

Meriax leaps into the air, wings beating loudly to start ascending. It kicks up some dust but disperses the rest of the smoke.

Vegeta (663) has posed:
"Today, you all leave with your lives. You won fair and square by the standards of a witch's whims. But know this..." Vegeta begins to float up into the sky, arms crossed again. He's apparently going to leave the hot tub. "I will rain down hell upon anyone who holds the Dragon Ball. I think twenty-four hours is a good countdown, then it'll be honorable again."

Kirikou (127) has posed:
    "Oh come on!" Kilik says, throwing up his hands. "How is that fair?! Okay sure, they were mostly pretty funny, but we had to be the underdogs here! Look at who I had to work with?" he says, glancing around at his crew of rogues and jokers. He looks up at Meriax then, and nods. He sort-of agrees with her. Who's going to argue with a flame-breathing dragon? Even if she's actually got a sense of humour?

Mister Satan (TP) (Dropped) has posed:
Granny Zam is secretly thrilled to have become the unintentional inheritor of a Capsule Corp hot tub.

Kyra Hyral (626) has posed:
    "I suuuure do." Kyra winks, admitting to her volumous knowledge of rear ends. She declines to get more detailed than that for damage control reasons-

    A dragonball is tossed to her and Kyra catches it in both hands, dropping the makeshift cane she was using. She stares at it, a little awed that something so small has been causing so much strife in the multiverse.

    Then she pulls out her phone, holds up the dragonball next to her cheek, and takes a picture with it. She's snapped out fo this moment by the sulfurous odor of Meriax's breath followed by her suggesting that they run-plus Vegeta threats. Oh boy. "OKAY! LET'S GET GOING NOW!"

Dracula Vlad Tepes (83) has posed:
    "I am an /incredible/ teammate," Slogra croaks loudly in response to Kilik, shaking a fist at his fellow Confederate. "Not my fault this lady just likes goody-goody limp-wristed /Union/ people. Tch."

    Gaibon, meanwhile, grumbles and lumbers over to Slogra, flapping his wings and plucking up the lankey lizard-demon in his claws. "Whatever. We got some good footage, I guess. Let's go blow up some cottages or something."

    Grumbling, the two of them fly off, no doubt to burninate some thatch-roof cottages in some hapless village somewhere to vent their frustrations.

Simon Petrikov (622) has posed:
Simon stops his acting when the identities are announced, kicking himself for not realizing Toph's role, but pleased that they - or more properly, Kyra - won the Dragon Ball. "Hey, awesome job, every-" he starts. Then he's kissed and he has a moment of surprise where he's just kind of too stunned to do anything else before Taylita has already gotten up and moved on. "...one?" he finishes uncertainly. Then he decides to just roll with it.

He feels good about this. He can do things to help after all. It's not all heroics and swords and sorcery. Working with others, even he can be useful. Now it's time for them to get out of here before the Confederates decide to abandon the temporary non-violence agreement, like Kyra said.

Toph Beifong (20) has posed:
    When Granny Zam announces that they are done, Toph does get to her feet, not bothering with brushing off her clothes. Her expression is one of hopeful anticipation. Did they do it? How did it go? At least Granny Zam was laughing a lot, that's a good sign, right? And then she begins summerizing what they were. And man, they are tied /again/?!

    Toph bites her lower lip, listening intently. Which team did she like the most?

    When the Dragon Ball is pulled out she holds her breath... only to cheer when she feels Granny Zam toss it to Kyra. Again Toph pumps her fist in the air, letting out a hoot of approval, grinning widely. Okay, let the old granny be grumpy. They won! And Toph shows her appreciation by /punching/ her fellow Unionites in the arms. Not too hard though, luckily. "Awesome going guys, we did it!" The earthbender too is ready to defend Kyra, throwing a grin in the Confederates' direction. "Too bad you guys are not that skilled in acting." Vegeta earns a snort. "You touch my friends and you are earning a rock to the head! And don't expect my help with gift shopping again if you do that," she warns him.

    "Let's go, guys. And leave the oogies for later." Ugh. Adults.

Ryuko Matoi (140) has posed:
    Ryuko just flips Vegeta off. "Whatever. I'm sure you'll have Lute do something shitty to someone, and be able to steal it back later, sure." She yawns, and stands from where she'd been sitting (on top of a giant gumdrop nearby), and heads off. "Well, thanks for the pay, Union dudes. I'll cash in later, so, see ya."