Two Homunculi (Sieg & Mordred)

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Two Homunculi (Sieg & Mordred)
Date of Cutscene: 06 October 2014
Location: OVER THE PHONE! Radio. Whatever.
Synopsis: A phone call!
Cast of Characters: 12, 566

PHONE: Sieg says, "Hey, um, is this the right number for Saber?"
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "Oh, sup Sieg. Yeah."
PHONE: Sieg says, "I want to ask something, but it's kind of strange and personal. Do you mind?"
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "Uh if you're going to ask me something like "please tell me how you truly feel about your father" probably yeah, otherwise probably not."
PHONE: Sieg says, "No, not like that. Or, um. Maybe a little like that, but I don't think it's that bothersome."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "Well let's hear it then."
PHONE: Sieg says, "I don't really know what I should do with... life. I'm helping Jean for now, but before that all I could think about was just surviving. Now I'm free, and I guess I'm powerful in a way, but I don't really know what I should do beyond that. I don't really have goals. The Holy Grail isn't something I want. I guess I was wondering what answer you found for yourself when you were summoned, but if it's too personal a thing to tell me I understand."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "Gee, that's a hard one. Well, alright, sure, I'll wax sentimental for you a bit. It took me a while. For the longest time I was pretty happy just being there, punching people, following orders. I guess I took a liking to my master though, because I mellowed out over time a bit. Then I finally found my father, and I tried to settle our grudge a few times. It's weird, we kept being interrupted. Never actually managed to really fight it out. Then more of them showed up and someone forced themselves in 'n... well, anyway, we get along again, because what's the point being angry for something that happened centuries ago? So life, huh... a goal. Well, all that to say I don't think I have one yet. I'm just cruising along and seeing what happens."
PHONE: Sieg says, "Did you just answer the question you told me specifically not to ask?"
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "Hey, fuck you, don't point out my wild inconsistencies and take the damn gift."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "ANYWAY."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "This mighta been the best thing to happen to me. Mother didn't make me to live a long life, so it's not like I was gonna grow up to be old with all the other knights. But hey, cheated the system. Immortality! Superpowers. Long as my master's alive, anyway. Now I can just do whatever I want. Isn't that what yer enjoying?"
PHONE: Sieg says, "Well... I guess. I'm not going to live forever, but at least I'm not going to die unless somebody kills me. I just don't know what to do with it all."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "Well let's be real, I ain't gonna live forever. Master'll probably get herself stabbed and even if I find a new one to hop to I'll run outta luck eventually. Wouldn't really call sitting in the Throne living, anyway, though if you're lucky maybe you can carve yourself a path in there too. Awkward point is though, I dunno. 'Going forward with all your might' is as good a purpose in life as any. Maybe you'll find something along the way."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "I don't know a single hero who woke up one morning and suddenly found his way. I mean, without bullshit assistance from the gods or something, that's dumb and doesn't count."
PHONE: Sieg says, "I think if any of the Gods showed up in my time period, it would be a pretty big sign that incredibly bad things are happening."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "Hey, point stands, don't split those hairs. Sometimes the answer's just, kick back, enjoy yourself, one day you'll find something you really want to do above anything else. Or like, fucking Odin or Zeus is gonna show up and tell you what to do, and then you can make it your mission if you want, your call."
PHONE: Sieg says, "B-both of those guys are some of the biggest villains in mythology..."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "You are literally the pickiest person ever."
PHONE: Sieg says, "I guess the, 'Wait and see.' answer is the only one that really makes sense, though."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "See it this way, most of the lowlifes on this planet die without even knowin' magic is a real thing, heroes existed, and shit's trippy and fantastic. They don't leave a mark, they never learn better, and they ain't even ever given a chance to. Ya've got a god damn huge step up on 'em already."
PHONE: Sieg says, "Is being a hero worth it?"
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "Depends on your viewpoint. Being a hero's like anything else, but bigger. Some things you really look back to. Some things you really regret. Is being alive worth it?"
PHONE: Sieg says, "Yes."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "There y'go then. Being a hero's just being alive and yourself. Most of the people who ended up heroes, they didn't do it for the sake of it, they did it 'cuz... dunno. They felt like it? They thought it was the right thing? I mean, look at you, you tried to punch a mini-Servant zombie thing. Did you have anythin' to gain from it?"
PHONE: Sieg says, "No. I just wanted to help."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "Someone somewhere would probably tell ya that's the stuff that makes heroes. Not all of 'em, I mean, some of us have done pretty awful shit yaddy yadda you don't need or want a history lesson from me, but y'know. Some guys want revenge, some want to conquer, some just wanna do what's right and save the princess. Me, I'd just tell ya to buy a punching bag and practice more first."
PHONE: Sieg says, "I was thinking about trying to figure out how to use magecraft to improve my body, but maybe something more basic is a better idea. And uh... if you do need another master and I'm still around, I'll help you."
PHONE: Sieg says, "Wish I could use gradation air like that one guy. I can't believe he can do that."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "Yeah no kidding, from what little I know about magecraft that should pretty much fry him alive and turn 'em into a magicless husk. Well, maybe you have your own gimmick but you just haven't found it. Isn't there something or another about magi having specialties that aren't decided by them?"
PHONE: Sieg says, "I was made for something, the same as you, so the things I'm good at were decided by design. I'm fine with regular magecraft, but I'm sure my specialty is something like 'transfer of magic' or 'storage of magic'. Maybe a mix of both."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "Gotta use what you have. Maybe there's a magecraft style that specializes in transfering energy into something else to make it useful. Like mana bombs."
PHONE: Sieg says, "Mana bombs? You can do that with mystic codes, but I haven't got any."
PHONE: Sieg says, "I could probably support a lot of familiars."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "Dunno, not a magus. Mother was more into alchemy than straight out magecraft. And familiars, yeah. Well, I mean, she did the fireballs and scary shadows thing too, but she was more about like, nasty potions and curses and enchantments. Dunno what a mystic code is. I just meant like... grab something that can store mana, fill it to capacity and throw it. Maybe it explodes. Is that how magecraft works?"
PHONE: Sieg says, "A Mystic Code is kind of like a Noble Phantasm. A lot of Noble Phantasms are basically just very powerful mystic codes, actually. You make an object with a function built into it, and call that function when you need it using mana. A very simple mystic code would simply discharge stored mana... or I guess, store it for later usage. But you'd need something with a really high storage capacity to just make a bunch of high-powered bombs."
PHONE: Sieg says, "Think of it as an item with a spell built into it."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "Then he'll be like sure bro but you're gonna have to pour your blood into the furnace for imbuement or something like that, however making legendary weapons go, but usually it's either some bitch in a lake gives it to you or you gotta pour yourself into the weapon somehow."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "PS maybe go look around lakes for lonely ladies with too many swords and she wants to get rid of 'em."
PHONE: Sieg says, "Fairies are almost as bad as gods."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "Do you literally hate everything fun?"
PHONE: Sieg says, "Well... I liked the thing with the donkey well enough."
PHONE: Sieg says, "But the idea of looking for the Lady of the Lake isn't a bad one. The sword was returned, in the end. Wouldn't you want that for yourself, though?"
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "Nah. Well, I mean, for one she's probably long dead or just... not there. But, anyway, Excalibur's nice, it just already has a better owner. The sword I want a shot at is before that but that's getting into personal territory. You could try seeing of any of the phantasmal races are still alive. Maybe one of them can send you on a quest to prove yourself and get your own fancy sword. Or whatever's better for you. Or if you find the remains of one, I bet their body parts make freaking potent weapon-making components."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "Like dragonscale armor or a unicorn horn wand."
PHONE: Sieg says, "Y-yeah... but..."
PHONE: Sieg says, "... I think even a really powerful sorcerer would wind up looking absurd waving around a wand, don't you?"
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "Probably! I'd have the ivory or whatever the fuck it's made out of slapped into the hilt of a sword, personally. S'the best I've got for ya though. Back in my days, said the old knight, when we wanted magical shit we had to do retarded ass quests to prove ourselves and then MAYBE Merlin would stop being an asshole long enough to give us toys, or they were obtained in the journey."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "Or, you know, that thing about lakes and lonely women with too many swords."
PHONE: Sieg says, "Wow. That guy who just copies weapons must really feel like a slap in the face to servants, if you put it that way."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "Dunno! I stole my sword from the armory, I didn't have a special one before that."
PHONE: Sieg says, "Um... why did the armory just have a magic sword sitting around in it to be stolen in the first place?"
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "'cuz the king already had Excalibur. Excalibur's like, the sword of victory, it's a sword of war, when you're in a war, you use it, and he was. Clarent was the sword of peace, it was only used during times of peace to like... knight people, and remind people the king was cool and worthy."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "Mother thought countering a sword of war with a sword of peace was ironic and incredible. I don't really care."
PHONE: Sieg says, "But a 'Sword of Peace' is a contradictory idea to begin with. I guess that doesn't matter much. It is a nice-looking sword, though."
PHONE: Sieg says, "All of you have weapons much different from the Saber who saved me. His was very large, and kind of plain, bound with a black cloth."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "I feel like I should recognize that but I'm drawing a blank. So many freaking swords in history."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "Well, I guess the Grail Wars wouldn't be any fun if all the Sabers used the same sword and all the Lancers the spare spear and etc. etc., so hey."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred *same
PHONE: Sieg says, "It is interesting, but the uncertainty is pretty nerve wracking. I'm sure the second Saber has been summoned by now, and I haven't even seen them yet. It's probably too much to hope that we won't even encounter each other."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "There's a reason they say us Sabers tend to always make it to the finals. Cross yer fingers though, fluke's never out of the question."
PHONE: Sieg says, "Speaking of that, I've got to get some rest. I stayed out too late, so I'm sure Jean is already annoyed. Thanks for talking with me, Mordred."
PHONE: Phoning Sieg, Mordred says, "Sure, anytime. You tell me if you find airport asshole."