Scene #6868: Stage 3: Rail Line Shootout

Owner	Pose
Tina Natsumi	For perhaps the first time time ever, dispatch actually delivers a message to the officers in Virtua City before anything's exploded yet. They relay it over the radio to anyone willing to come help with the city's ongoing fight with EVIL Inc. The message: "The terrorists are making away with a bomb in the subway!" Unfortunately, it's not a very good message. As Michael's and James' vehicle rolls to a stop by the entrance to the subway station, James is already scoping the area out while Michael starts adjusting his radio. He takes a moment to breathe, check his gear, then sends out the call for backup. MUSIC: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WSuT75EWGA8 By the time the Elites arrive on the scene, there's already multiple bodies on the way into the subway station. Going down the stairs, though, it doesn't take long until they reach the pair of officers, already shooting their way towards the waiting subway train as the doors slide open. Gangsters file out of the doors seemingly at random to take shots at the officers, likely getting shot themselves in the process. Meanwhile, civilians amble along past them in varying stages of distress and complete inattentiveness to the likelihood of getting shot themselves. The officers' current goal: Get into the train before it departs! However, there's already loads of gangsters in suits and army fatigues holding them back at the doors and aiming from the roof of the train. This could take a while, and time is already of the essence if the reports of the bomb are true.
Big Boss	He's back. With a bandana around his forehead, a light machine gun in his hands, and a grin, the British Cowboy has decided to assist on this leg of the operation as well. Machinegun Kid is kneeling on top of the train, machinegun steadied. As the cops approach... The machinegun goes off, rattling at them, while avoiding civilians utterly. They'll probably be forced back to cover, and so will any Elites assisting them! "Yeehaw, pardners! I'm back, baby!" Machinegun Kid is 100% British, and is 100% still speaking like a cowboy.
Eggman	There's a light at the end of the tunnel. That's not metaphorical. Subway station controllers get a bunch of red lights on their dashboard as a much brighter, whiter light rounds one of the many bends towards the station. There's a train off-schedule. It's coming in much too early. It's also coming in entirely the wrong direction. This is probably the least of their worries, but if someone has the presence of mind to check that sort of thing during a literal cops-and-robbers battle, they might be able to radio it in to someone. The light gets brighter. And brighter. And brighter. There's an enormously loud WHOO WHOOOOOOO that absolutely does not belong in a subway. The echoing pulse of a steam engine. The powerful roar of an old-timey train, the sort that rolls over countrysides, a symbol of iron and ingenuity. The noise bounds off the walls as the bright light sweeps out of the tunnel and into the station. It's a giant robot millipede bullet train. More than that, though, it's a giant robot caterpillar bullet train with a glowing red visor for eyes, a sloped and slanted bullet-train nose, segmented round sections with lots of little legs all moving in incredibly rapid motion, and an emblem on the front. The Eggman Empire Emblem. The white light dies as the train hisses, venting steam and smog into the air. It's a nuisance, not a problem. A little bit of heat and some messy visibility but not enough to really get in anybody's way. Quite the opposite from what happens next, which is both a nuisance and a real problem. The millipede's doors open. Drills extend from inside. They pierce into the train like a spaceship's boarding clamps. They drill into the subway cars, then open, flowering irises giving way to long boarding tubes. And then the music starts up, and a voice takes over the intercom. "Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, I am the Master of Mayhem, Doctor Ivo Robotnik, and I am afraid to announce that there's been an unplanned change of schedule!" In the cockpit of the Caterkiller Mk-III, the Doctor's moustache bristles. "This train is departing immediately for the Egg Line." You can almost see the grin on his face, the gleam of his glasses. "Please keep all arms and legs inside the ride at all times. The conductor, Mr. Goro Majima, will be around shortly to punch your tickets. I suspect he would very much appreciate it if you DIDN'T cooperate at all! Hahahahahahaha!" "NOW DEPARTING - THE EGG LINE!" The Caterkiller's front opens up. It has a giant drill. Little arms emerge with track in their hand. Oh no.
Majima Goro	It's not that Majima is, strictly speaking, a good guy. EARLIER TODAY But imagine, briefly, you're sitting there one day eating your noodles in broth, and one of your employees waves you over because they don't know what something means, so you go over, and they ask what 'making away with a bomb' means. "..eh? I ain't got a clue what 'makin away with a bomb' means. Maybe they're stealin' a bomb?" "In the subway, Boss? Why would they be taking a bomb away from a subway?" There's a sigh, and Majima rubs his face, as other employees weigh in. "Yeah! What does that even mean!" "I wanna know too!" "Also, who are the terrorists?" There is a wave of a hand, as Majima grabs his jacket. "ALRIGHT, alright, I'll go find out what they're talkin' about. You guys better do at least an hour of overtime if I'm gonna be sittin' here indulgin' your curiosity about somethin' in another goddamn world." SUBSTORY START: Lost In Translation Somewhere, along the line, the easiest route to the subway ended up going along with Eggman, which necessitated a change of outfit. Majima's outright just wearing a black and red suit with an old-style conductor's cap. The cap itself has a Eggman Empire emblem on the front, in a shiny, metallic red. And then comes the transfer, and some terrorist, somewhere, is not going to be making away with a bomb today. Instead, he is going to be the first guy to get a bat to the face from Conductor Majima.
Tina Natsumi	Machinegun Kid's presence is infectious. Spotting a familiar face, several of the gangsters join him atop the train with their own handguns and assault rifles, hooting and hollering as they add more bullets to his suppressing fire. "Yeah! Nothin' can stop us!" And then that gangster staggers and falls flat on his back atop the train when the Caterkiller smashes right into that poor subway. Just about everyone inside the train can be seen toppling over from the impact, too, and the officers themselves have no idea what they're even listening to when the good doctor makes his presence audible. "... Agent Fielding? We're... Gonna need a minute." James delivers over his mouthpiece in the most deadpan tone he can muster. Michael seems largely undettered as he keeps shooting at the distracted gangsters, putting a few moer down while everyone's still dumbstruck by the sight of that massive bug-train and the one-eyed conductor coming out to slam a bat right into an unlucky goon's face. "Who are these... Ah, sod it! Take him down, too!" One of the lead gangsters shouts before charging at Majima with an axe, trying to chop it right through him with all the skill he can muster through a lifetime of looking tall and intimidating enough to not actually need to fight. Several others, meanwhile, start shooting at Majima and the Eggman's drill-train, although their aim at the latter is largely unfocused and just aimed at center mass because it's a big freaky bug mecha thing. Others, meanwhile, keep shooting at the officers who are taking advantage of the confusion to try getting into the train itself to begin the rescue and retrieval process for civilians and bombs, respectively. Said civilians are stumbling out of the train over the bodies, and others are cheering both Machinegun Kid and Majima on because... Well, they might not be very smart. MUSIC: https://youtu.be/FWTLR_LFiqw Despite the giant machine in front of it, the train's engines keep going as it starts pushing back against the Caterkillar, the driver apparently trying to brute force the vehicle onwards to reach... Wherever it is it's supposed to be going! The driver, of course, is also hanging out the window to shoot at the Caterkillar. With a handgun. It's probably not going to do much compared to the train pushing against it, but he still needs to be able to say he tried!
Big Boss	Well, that's a bug train. And it's hijacking them with drills. Machinegun Kid does not start shooting at it as his allies do. Instead, he grabs his comm, and begins talking to the Commander, immediately, who is coordinating with EVIL. AFter some thought... Machinegun Kid grabs his machinegun, hefts it over his shoulder, and jumps down, whizzing out of the way of bullets narrowly, and entering the train directly through a window. He takes a seat, holding his machinegun on his lap, as he waits for a robot or Majima to pass by. To make sure EVIL Inc personnel aren't suspicious, he radios their line, telling them 'I'm waiting for an ambush point'. But currently, he's not. Machinegun Kid has an Idea, as he's been given full cooperation control. And fighting other criminals...that ain't no fun, y'all.
Eggman	'Center of mass' is a weird concept on a giant multi-segmented train. Shooting into the boarding drills makes some sparks happen, and there's noises of things going 'bweee' and thudding in the dark, but it's basically impossible to see what kind of damage is being done. The train starts grinding against the boarding drills and the Caterkiller begins its own movement in the opposite direction. There is a tremendous screeeeech as the two engines fight it out, over the din of the gunfire pinging off the Caterkiller's hull. Inside the train, Eggman just rubs his brows. "My word. How uncivilized. You'd think they'd all have the decency to just surrender. I went to all this work and put together this marvelous device in the span of an afternoon and here they are all firing at it like a bunch of animals." A robot waddles up with a cup of coffee. Eggman takes it and sips it as he stares at the monitors. "Honestly, E-002, don't these goons have any appreciation for art? For science? For evil?" The robot stares at him. It whirrs. It blinks. He sighs again. "I don't know why I even bother. Next time I'll make something that can converse with me once in a while." "Or at least say 'yes, doctor' all the time." The robot stares at him vacantly until he waves his hand to dismiss it. With a flourish, the diabolical Doctor presses a big red button on the dashboard, then turns a blinking dial all the way up into the red. The engine roars to life. Two things occur. First, the Caterkiller's boarding drills open wider, transforming into clamps. They stick themselves inside the train, anchoring it firmly as the Caterkiller begins to move forward despite the pressure. They're helpfully calculated so that they do not simply tear the train in half, but continued pressure will probably do serious damage to it - which, undoubtedly, Eggman is counting on in order to force a surrender. Second, a series of high-tech robots wielding laser guns stomp through those clamps. They have singular mono-eye visors. They are sleek and angled, bipedal machines that scan the room every so often like something out of a science fiction movie. Several drones follow behind. They are dangling pads off of them. One of them sails over to Machinegun Kid. The others sail off to various other passengers. The laser-wielding robots start moving to take control of the doors, unless otherwise impeded or attacked. They are probably more concerning than the Caterkiller right now in the immediate scheme of things.
Majima Goro	The axe swings down, and Majima seemingly makes no motion to dodge it, only leaning back..? The axe's curve cuts through the air, before it suddenly stops. HEAT ACTION: Essence of Blade Biting The axe has stopped, of all things, in Majima's mouth. He's just bit right onto it. He looks up, low to the ground. He kicks the thug in the stomach, ripping the axe out of his hands with one hand, and then swinging it back around to throw directly in his foe's stomach. That probably ends Majima's concern with that fellow. There's a moment while he leans down to recover his conductor's hat, sliding it back on before starting to make his way through the train once more. He's stepping rhythmically, his hands moving back and forth almost in a hiphop motion. And that leaves him, after a few more unfortunate thugs learning that breakdancing makes a strangely effective fighting style...within reach of the Machinegun Kid. "..." He stops. There's a moment as he looks to the British man. Then the machine gun. His lips purse together for a minute. He taps his foot. "...well? Ya gettin' up or not? I don't get ta see machine guns often." Majima is well aware that there's another objective, but he also doesn't care.
Big Boss	Machinegun Kid waits. As Majima shows up, he looks up to him, tilts his head, and then reaches...for the pad from the robot. He writes his name on it, and a communications line for Outer Heaven that isn't classified. "I'm not fighting with a machinegun in close-quarters. Do y'all think I'm insane or something?"
Tina Natsumi	The EVIL personnel have more pressing matters on their mind past Machinegun Kid suddenly not machinegunning as much. More specifically, their hijacked train is getting double-hijacked! That certainly won't do for what their bosses want, and they're still opening fire on the Caterkillar even as their own captive's engines start to burn and putter out from the combination of drills and clamps making it difficult for the train to get away without ripping itself apart and risk the loss of cargo. Confusion starts to sound among those goons, though, as the dinging of bullets starts to slow down. From the outside, it doesn't look all that surprising. Facing a one-eyed madman and laser guns from an out-of-place vehicle, who wouldn't just sit back and try to talk their way out of things? Idiot goons, perhaps, but even they're oddly compliant as they listen in on their earpieces. It certainly helps that one of them just got an axe in his gut. A few of the gangsters already looked excited when Majima bit down on the axe to stop it, and they're whooping when he takes down the axeman. It seems said axeman wasn't very popular, since none of them move to his defense. They instead turn their attention towards the officers that haven't made much headway thanks to... Well, THAT, and also the lasers welding the train doors shut. Michael curses under his breath when the train starts pulling out in the wrong direction with the Caterkillar, James curses audibly, and they start falling back in the direction of the subway station's exit while radioing the situation in. Inside the train, things are only getting stranger little odd. As Machinegun Kid and Majima have their own discussion, another voice comes over the radio. "Good evening, sirs. This situation just got much more complicated, do you know?" It doesn't come through all that clearly, but Machinegun Kid or his commander may still recognize that voice. "What's your goal here? EVIL Inc. doesn't like meddlers, but we don't like wasting resources if we don't have to." As the Caterkillar and the subway keep moving, the tracks eventually breach the surface with a scenic view of the city in all its glory. The highway is close by, and there's the beginnings of a construction site visible in the distance.
Big Boss	Another voice pops onto the radio line. It's a gruff baritone, older male, who clearly isn't taking any shit. Big Boss speaks loud and clear. "What they want is clear, if you go by their methods...but hearing it in their own words is logical. Practical, even. This is Outer Heaven's commander. It seems Elites are always a thorn in a plan's side."
Majima Goro	... Majima's face contorts for a moment. "..Fuckin' reason? Ya need a -reason-?!" He looks down at that machinegun, seconds away from doing something incredibly rash, when suddenly a new voice is on the radio. "...what the hell?" He taps on his cell phone a few times, as two new voices join unto the fray. "...I'm here 'cause it sounded like a good fuckin' time! Fuck else reason do I need?" He slams a fist into the side of the train, keeping his one eye firmly on the Machinegun Kid. "So, seein' as though you keep interruptin' my good time, I'm officially up for stoppin' whatever it is you're up to on principle, Mountain Man soundin' guy." The goons get a firm Look from Majima. "Well? One of ya wanna give this guy with a gun a reason ta do his job?"
Big Boss	Machinegun Kid looks up to Majima, and gestures his machinegun slightly. "You realize. That if I fire this in here, against you, an agile fighter, there's a chance of innocent civilians getting killed, yes?" The drawl is slightly lost. He's serious. "Are you so reckless that you care more about a random fight than your ally's goals? Huh?"
Eggman	"EVIL Incorporated, is it?" Eggman says to himself. The rotund Robotnik chuckles. He snaps his fingers. A cupholder robot wanders over and extends an arm to take his coffee. This disposed of, the Doctor cracks his knuckles and picks up his microphone. The noise of his voice once more echoes from everywhere on the train. "EVIL Incorporated, is it?" Yes, he said the same thing he said in private, out loud. "How good of you to call! I believe that by now you have had some introductions, but I shall once again provide you with the benefit of my magnanimousity. I am the nefarious Doctor Eggman, the world's greatest supervillain." He lets that hang in the air for a moment. He drums his fingers on the console, in fact, to get the specific amount of moment, as the Caterkiller's forward drill widens and begins digging a tunnel for both itself and the hijacked train. There's an art to how long you should delay a supervillain announcement. Have to give people time to spit their hero words at you or be shocked or scramble to surrender, after all. That done, he picks up the microphone again. "While I cannot speak for my associate, Mr. Goro Majima, I am here to, shall we say, make a statement." Eggman reclines in his Supervillain Chair, kicking his feet up on the console. "That statement is that I am, indeed, the World's Greatest Supervillain - regardless of which world I happen to be visiting at the time. You might also consider this to be something of a resume. While your 'EVIL Incorporated' is an exceedingly cute name, and I've no doubt you've a fair collection of masterminds and manipulators and perhaps a swath of thugs and thuggabouts, I am a cut far above that sort of thing. I have no doubt that you can see as much here. If you've some video feed, please! Examine my miraculous Caterkiller Engine, my extraordinary Egg Gunners, my Drone Egg. Take them all in. And take a look outside, at the drilling, the digging, and the rapid-fire track-laying of my Caterkiller Engine as it goes further and further underground, away from any response teams you might be able to concoct without entering the tunnel I've created." Eggman taps his foot against the console lightly. "To get to the point, I want to know more about your EVIL Incorporated." "Let's call me an interested buyer demonstrating my qualifications as a future owner. The Eggman Empire could use a franchise, and yours sounds too entertaining to pass up." "Or," Eggman's glasses gleam, "This might be the start of a hostile takeover, in which case, showing you exactly what sort of market share I have is also a worthy endeavor, wouldn't you agree?" To Big Boss, he says, "Of course they aren't obvious. What, do you think I care about some meaningless bomb? This is a stage and nothing more, you blundering buffoon. If it was just a bomb I wanted I could build a hundred of them."
Big Boss	"I'm aware." Big Boss says, matter-of-factly. "You could simply build a hundred of them. You also do not want money, for you would not have attacked this train specifically if that was the case." He's audibly smoking a cigar. "You want the public to see what you're capable of. Fear and respect. It's why you call yourself a /supervillain/. To be quiet and unknown is anathema. Your hostile takeover attempt makes sense with this. Own an organization that's already on the public stage. Take the credit." "As I said, what you want is quite clear, if you go by your methods."
Tina Natsumi	"That they are, indeed. From their methods, it looks like they want a train. They want visibility. They want people to know they're here." The man chuckles a tinny and badly distorted chuckle, although it doesn't sound like it's distorted on purpose. It's just a crappy microphone putting his voice through equally crappy subway speakers. It probably sounds worse on the other radio, what with going through two sets of microphones and a crappy set of speakers at that point. "Aside from the train, it looks like they want what we want, and that's just fine." The voice lets out a briefer, hoarser chuckle at Majima's excitement, and the goons on board grip their guns a little more firmly when Majima calls them out. It seems that they're looking a little too ready to start firing again, kept only in check by the fact that they haven't received any further orders to fire yet. "And from what the good Doctor Robotnik and the energetic Mister Majima are telling me, I'm led to believe that I've hit the nail on the head. I'll have one my men get some recordings sent my way for my own viewing later, don't you worry." The man chuckles yet again, and one of the goons scurries to get a camcorder running from the top of the train. He quickly scurries back inside once the train starts going back underground and through the ground. The last thing the group sees before heading back down is a racetrack featuring cars and horses racing side by side. "We of EVIL Incorporated have... Designs on this city. We have certain goals that require making sure nobody mistakes us as common thugs that don't know how to do any sort of long-term planning beyond shooting now and asking questions never." There's an audible grunt when Eggman calls EVIL Inc. cute, but the voice remains steady. "For today, all we need is what's on the train. You can take the glory of hijacking it, because..." There's a longer pause. "... We don't mind sharing in the glory for this heist. We're entrepreneurs and contractors, and this just so happens to be a contract of ours. As long as we get the cargo on this train where it needs to go, I think we can arrange for you to take the rest of the train for your own parade. And after that..." "Maybe our people could talk to your people. How does that sound?"
Eggman	Eggman taps his finger on the dashboard. "I couldn't care less about the train, or the bomb." "Contractors and entrepreneurs, though - that I am more than happy to interact with. Yes, I shall indeed be sending you a message soon." He steeples his fingers in front of the dashboard. "I shall be sending you a message of great import." He clicks off the microphone, picks up his coffee off the coffee-holder robot, and takes a long sip. "Big Boss and EVIL Inc. Outer Heaven and a group of contractors. I wonder." His fingers drum against the dashboard as he stares out at the digging. "Well. I suppose if they're contractors and entrepreneurs it won't be hard to buy them out. Or I'll just take them over myself. It's a decent city. It could make a fine beginning to Robotnikland." Eggman drains the rest of his coffee and sets it back on a different robot, which trundles away to go wash the coffee cup as it was made to do. He swings his feet around and props them up on his Ottobot, which inflates its cushion as it was designed to do. He strokes his moustache slightly. "By the end of the fiscal year, I'll be the only EVIL Incorporated in this city, one way or another! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!" Then he turns the microphone back on. "I shall drop off your package somewhere suitably easy for you to access. Out of the wickedness of my heart. Consider it a show of evil faith, in order to better grease the wheels of my inevitable, hopefully peaceful, takeover of your organization."
Majima Goro	There's a moment. Majima considers again explaining his position of Near Neutrality on the issue, but settles against it, instead just adjusting his conductor hat. This is increasingly starting to sound like boring bullshit. Cancel that, that was a race track where horses were racing cars. That's amazing. Wow. Why wasn't he doing that, instead of being on this subway with a guy who refuses to use his machinegun? Still, if the guy's gonna get civvies involved, and the civilians haven't, he doesn't know, gone to maybe a different car, or laid down, or something, he'll have to put up with it. He considers for a long moment. This entire thing has been, admittedly while completing the main objective of 'figure out what the hell that radio message meant', somehow still incredibly dissatisfying. So he waits another moment. Looks away from the Machinegun Kid. "...Arright, so, what, we're just waitin' round to park the train, now?" He asks, before looking directly back at the Machinegun Kid. "...Nehehhe. Okay. Arright."
Tina Natsumi	Majima isn't the only one itching for a fight. Noticing that tension between him and Machinegun Kid, the goons whisper to each other as they not-so-subtly start ushering the remaining civilians towards the other cars. It's not like there's anywhere for them to escape to, anyway, but it's got to be more exciting than listening to their boss and the red guy! Some of the civilians do hover near the windows to watch and see what happens, though. If anything happens. They don't have anything better to do while waiting to be rescued, anyway. "You'll be returning the bomb, then? Oh, that's absolutely wonderful. And as a show of good faith, you'll have access to our eyes and ears in the city. We've got our fingers on the pulse of this wretched place, and even the mayor's in our pockets whether he likes it or not." The voice laughs oddly, adjusting something metallic off-speaker. "... Just don't drop it off too far away. Getting the cargo in was hard enough. There should be an armory on the surface not too far from... Wherever it is you're heading. There's a museum there, and I'll have one of our contacts waiting." The voice pauses for an absurdly long time, and there's an audible disconnect in-between before there's feedback from the mic being plugged back in. "I don't know about a takeover, but if you think you've really got enough money to throw around for that, I might have to get you in touch with another business partner of mine down the line." There's another audible pop and hiss of a can being opened. "Doctor Robotnik. Mister Majima. Mister Majima... You mentioned being president of your own construction company to our colleague, Machinegun Kid, correct? How quickly can you get an airfield built?" Another pause. "One large enough for... Say. Several large helicopters. Or a blimp?" This man is not very good at subtlety.
Big Boss	Machinegun Kid shifts that machinegun in his lap. "Glad to see you're seeing reason." Meanwhile, Big Boss only speaks up over the comms to reply. <"Outer Heaven is willing to send aid to your operations in Virtua City, if this is to go through. Machinegun Kid would be your main liason, as operative in charge of the region." Machinegun Kid replies over his radio. <"Well, shucks, boss, I ap preciate that.">
Majima Goro	Majima just taps his foot. He's patient. Kind of patient. And then, finally, the train starts to stop. The moment the vehicle has stopped moving, Majima begins moving again--primarily, he is moving to deliver a kick directly to the Machinegun Kid's chest. Not, necessarily, to hurt him, though that steel-tipped shoe isn't exactly cushioned--no, just to throw him off long enough for Majima to grab the machinegun from him. "...Ya can have this back when ya fill that raincheck, eh?!"
Big Boss	Majima's kick is actually unexpected. Machinegun Kid was expecting SOMETHING, but not a kick, and definitely not the theft of his machinegun. Majima feels a brief tug of war for the gun, before he's able to pull it away and run off with it. So, MG Kid leaps to his feet, and is about to chase him, but it's too crowded. "Fuck you! Give that back!" He can get a new one, but...that's a big gun. He'll have to fight Majima, it seems.
Tina Natsumi	That kick has the gangsters and the observing civilians cheering. They need the distraction as that train stops in the middle of an underground tunnel that (for all they know) could collapse on them at any minute, after all! A confused noise comes from the speakers followed by a sigh when he puts two and two together. "... Just make sure not to break anything in the back cars. It'd be unfortunate if any of our new business partners suffered an untimely end."
Majima Goro	Majima Goro is not going nuts. He's making his way out of the train with a giant machinegun that he is /absolutely/ unqualified to use. He is actually giddy.