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Bowser FANTASY COSTCO, WHERE ALL YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE

(got a deal for you)

On a planetoid, deep in space, where space buses travel from every world, is the Fantasy Costco.

A parking lot stretches for lightyears in all directions, lightning rails dot these parking lots. Fantasy Costco brand pizza and soft drink stations riddle the landscape to feed the people on their way to the Fantasy Costco, which itself is a brick and mortar shop the size of a continent.

The size of the crowd in front of the Fantasy Costco baffles the mind. Few people in their normal worlds can conceive of a number of people of this magnitude. Having every person who lives in an entire country at a single spot in that country... and you are still two orders of magnitude off. The lightning rails are choked. The Pizza and Soft Drink shops have been shuttered, bolted with heavy steel.

The people themselves come from all over the multiverse. Among the normals here who have gathered for a chance to even glimpse The Official GIlgamesh Action Figure With Official Gilgamesh NFT are the powerful, the elite. Armor stands shoulder to shoulder with trenchcoat. 8 foot tall robots, 3 foot tall kobolds, anime hair, powerful toxic males stand next to women with side part haircuts. All of them are armed to the teeth.

Angry murmurs rumble among the crowd, but there seems to be a ceasefire for the second.

A humanoid sized and vaguely shaped figure shrouded in black robes rises up, making the murmurs. "Hello~ IT IS I! GARFIELD THE DEALS WARLOCK! Welcome to Extra Black Friday!"

You have arrived early enough to stand somewhat near the first mile of the crowd of the Fantasy Costco.
Kukuru Among the throngs of shoppers is another shopper, clad in the battle gear of someone on the hunt for a good deal: An apron, stained with the blood of what is hopefully just something that became food. Glasses, to fit in with those actually straining to see the fine print in their fistfuls of coupons. Claws, with which to...

Okay, Kukuru's just wearing the claws to make sure she gets a wide berth. Being scrunched up against people kind of sucks, and having pointy metallic bits on the ends of each hand as big as a torso helps to prevent that! Then again, she could just teleport her happy ass to the front of the line, but it'd be rude to just cut past everyone, right? Right.

It'd be so easy to, though. So so easy. Garfield introduces himself, and that urge grows stronger by the moment. She keeps herself in check, however, by just clapping politely when the Deals Warlock introduces himself. It's a noisy clap thanks to, again, big metal fuckoff claws, but at least she's golf-clapping instead of going ham for it. "He-llo! Do you have any deals on fancy bedding with the cooling stuff inside of it? You know, with the... Uh..."

She's taking a while. She probably won't figure out what she's actually looking for by name anytime soon.
Hesinca Much of the line is taken up by strange penguin things.

"I can't believe we're having to camp out here, dood," says one of them.

"Yeah, can't Mistress Hesinca wait in line for her own overpriced cheap crap, dood?"

"It beats cleaning out the movie theater, though, dood."

A head pokes out of the glowing floor tile near their camping spot. "What the heaven, you're nowhere near the front of the line!"

"We- we got here as fast as we could, dood! But it's like people started lining up before it was even announced!"

"Hmmmf. Figure something out," says Hesinca, in a tone that brooks no arguments, as she disappears back into the floor.

"... Crap, we gotta do something, dood..."
Bowser Everyone turns to Kukuru as she interrupts the Deals Warlock. The Deals Warlock stares at Kukuru before throwing their arms up. "OF COURSE WE DO. IT'S THE FUCKING FANTASY COSTCO! Did you bring your book?!"

A nearby Rock Troll hands Kukuru a phonebook sized 'Extra Black Friday' primer. Oh man, Bolters are 50% off, doorbuster deal!

"Ahem. Welcome to Extra Black Friday!"

An Elon Sanchez lifts up his hand, "It's not Fri-"

Omega Beams bursts out from Garfield's eyes, disintegrating him on the spot before the figure continues. "WELCOME TO EXTRA BLACK FRIDAY! We will be opening the doors in one minute! And I'm afraid to announce... there is only ONE The Official Gilgamesh Action Figure With Official Gilgamesh NFT left!"

A trillion throats gasp in unity.

Garfield lifts up a hand. "I know, I know... So to help you out, we have removed the no combat restrictions within the Fantasy Costco! All employees have been armed with power armor and heavy weaponry, and anyone who destroyed merchandise will have bought it!"

Silence falls over the crowd.

Garfield's eyes turn into cheerful slits, "Remember to bleed on the unholy sigils!"

A timer begins.

60...

59...

58...
Hesinca The prinnies start panicking.

"Crap - crap, dood, what do we do... if we don't get that thing, Hesinca's gonna put us on the motel buffet!"

"... There's a buffet, dood? There's just a counter with some prepackaged cereal and a waffle iron."

"Yeah, that's the buffet, dood."

"That isn't a buffet, dood! That's - that's like a breakfast bar."

"It's got options, dood, it qualifies as a buffet!"

"Cereal without milk or slightly burnt waffles, dood - *two* options! That feels like it shouldn't count!"

The prinnies spend the entire countdown timer arguing over the definition of a buffet versus a breakfast bar.
Kukuru Kukuru holds up her tome. Sadly, it's from last month, so she takes the Rock Troll's offering with a warm smile and a gentle pat on the cheek. "Tha-anks. Easy now, don't wanna drop your wallet or anything before you get in."

She also returns the favor with a fresh bottle of water that just happened to be in her pocket. She also shoves the old book back into her pocket despite it being way too big to fit in there. It's not clear how she's doing it, but it's happening.

Garfield lets loose with the call to violence, and Kukuru tilts her head at almost a ninety degree angle as she gives him a blank stare. "Gilgamesh...? NFT? Who and..." She takes a while to let those gears turn, looking over at the Prinnies a convenient distance away and listening to their conversation about what qualifies as a buffet to try and get them to turn faster.

Somehow, it actually helps, and she snaps her fingers/claw tips with a loud scratching noise. "Oh! That's the boy with all the shiny things that the First..." Closing her eyes, she claps her hands together, then falls backwards as a burst of generic RPG dark magic appears around her, swallowing her up and spitting her right back out...

About six feet up and over to take a seat on that Rock Golem's shoulder. From there, it should be easier to get a better view of where that action figure is with her SPECIAL EYES. If she does, she does that RPG Maker teleporting bullshit again to get right over there!
Bowser The Rock Troll goes 'thunk thunk thunk'. He is holding a wallet. The wallet is a rock. But he smiles. "Hopes I don't have to squish ya into goo."

A wizard standing next to the prinny bangs his staff against the ground, "IT IS A BREAKFAST BUFFET, YOU DIGUSTING FLAPJACKS!"

Kukuru teleports to the top of the Rock Trol. "Hey! That isn't nice. I have personal space! Stay out of my bubble!"

He rolls his arm up at her, trying to sway her off.

3...
2...
1...

The doors open. Immediately, Kukuru gets to the front of the crowd, but can't see the Official Gilgamesh Action Figure With Official Gilgamesh NFT display. It is featured in the book! Two Gilgamesh cardboard standees flanked by cardboard cutouts of various Earth history figures turned into various pretty girls. Kukuru is, at least, the first person in the massive store. Hey look, stand mixers are only 4 dollars!

Immediately, a group of Orks travel forward, cleaving their axes down into a swarm of walking plush bears, axes ripping through their 'flesh' and spilling blood on the pavement!

A small blue robot child on a red dog flies over Kukuru, escaping the barrage of bullets that come from the Terran Space Marines aimed at the front door in an attempt to clear the way!

The prinnies are distracted long enough to suddenly be threatened with trampling by a huge chitinous beast. A man on top in a loincloth points forward, "Go Tundro!" Rocks fire from the horn, blasting apart a group of servbots.
Kukuru For better or for worse, Kukuru still has no idea what she's looking for. She has the pictures to work off of, at least, so she can try to...

No, that's cardboard. Not worth picking up. She nearly walks into one of the cardboard Gilgameshes, too, but she's soon distracted by the stand mixers. Sure, she has one at home already, but... Four dollars!

She keeps one tucked under her arm just in case. The timing is good, too, as she sees Orks coming through, cutting up bears, and then a blue robot child with dog flying overhead. He seems to have a better idea of how to maneuver through this mass of wild destruction and bullshit, so without further ado, she...

Actually, she takes a moment to see where the Spehs Mareens are shooting. "Hey. That's dangerous. Would you want your parents to see you doing this kind of thing?" Yes, she's going to take some time to scold them all, never mind the fact that she basically looks like a 5'5" housewife rather than someone that could tear them in half. Not that she would do such a thing, of course, because she's trying to instill better values in these shoppers!

Well, unless they get violent with her. Then she might be tearing one or several of them in half. Vertically, even! (But they'll be fine because she can revive them afterwards).
Hesinca "Okay - so by the terms of this truce, we call it a 'mini-buffet', possessing the properties of both- DOOD!"

The prinnies get scattered, several exploding on impact.

"What - dood! The prinmanity!"

The surviving prinnies gather together, cowering.

"Wait - we gotta keep going! If we don't get the thing, we *all* are dead doods!"

Grabbbing dead servbot parts as shields and bludgeoning weapons, the prinnies charge!
Bowser One of the Terran Space Marines stops, looking rather sad. "It's all I know. The industrial prison complex didn't give me a chance to turn my life ar-ARRRRRGH." A lance bursts through his face. The house wife carrying the lance is carrying a baby bjorn on her back and chest, withdrawing the lance from the armored man. The space marine tumbles in a heap to the ground and the Housewife lets out a battle cry, throwing the lance into another Space Marine. The Space Marines take their guns to her, but the bullets seem unable to strike the babies, deflecting before landing on her.

MEANWHILE, the servbots are lifted up, their indestructible bodies perhaps not entirely indestructible, but good makeshift shields. The wizard behind the prinnies lifts his staff and holds it aloft. "I AM USIDORE! AND BY THE FORCES OF GOOD AND THE BIRDS AND THE WINDS, I MUST HAVE THIS TOOOOOOY!" He slams the staff down with a KRACK and the pavement rips open, throwing the army of Power Rangers in every direction. This gives the Prinnies the room to get into the store proper.

Meanwhile, a moustached thirty or so man in a polo shirt, shorts, socks, and sandals stands up to Kukuru, "Oh, hey, are you looking for the Gilgamesh Action Figure? It's over on aisle three hundred and two. You know, I'm going to go get the last one for my son who is in the hospital. You know, it's his last wish before he dies of gout cance-OH GOD!."

He does cower as a Terminator(you can tell because his eye is blasted off) starts marching towards Kukuru to walk right through her, swinging a stop sign at her!
Hesinca The prinnies charge in!

"Don't worry dood! There's twelve left of us, one of us is sure to-"

A shotoclone dragon-punches the prinny that was speaking.

"There's eleven of us, we've got more than enough to-"

A gigantic burger time patty falls on that prinny, turning him into 100 points.

"Ten of us! There's-"

The prinny gets stuffed into an animatronic suit, which kills it.

"Stop counting and charge, DOOD!"
Kukuru Oh, that won't do at all. The Terran Space Marine sounded like he might have a chance to turn things around, and by god Kukuru is going to give him that chance! With the powers vested in her by scientists that ultimately got busted for embezzlement, she pushes  her healing nanites into overdrive, directing right into that guy that just got most of his head removed.

The power to revive people is truly terrifying, but she doesn't stop at just fixing his head and bringing him back to life. She puts more power into him, more than should responsibly be used. Why? Because in addition to bringing him back to life, she's also making him EXTRA LARGE and EXTRA POWERED. The size and the strength boost will wear off over time, anyway, but it might help give her a little extra cover for getting that figure.

"Hm? Oh, yeah. I didn't know a thing about it coming here, but it sounds like it'd make a nice present." She hums pleasantly to the moustached man regardless of whatever blood and viscera she might have all over her face, but she's decidedly less pleasant when the a Terminator goes for that good old stop sign maneuver. With the power vested in her by her parents spawning her, she goes for the good old cross-counter, thrusting a claw right at the a Terminator's entire upper body even as he busts her head open right on that stop sign!

Her key advantage here: She can heal herself really good.
Bowser The Prinnies struggle to dive, diner and dash through the Fantasy Costco, being steadily squashed, crushed, and maimed like they entered the Grape Escape. Their numbers slowly dwindle, but their sheer numbers are proving to be a boon. For each one that is crushed violently and flattened into paste, they can still run deeper into the store! The press remains mostly at the doors, as people kill and maim to make their way in.

A kaiju roar rips through the air as a blue wave of laser rips through the crowd at the door. Garfield looks at a glowing evil chart that rolls upward. "Boy howdy! These sure are a lot of souls, I don't even know what we use them for!"

A man in a generic suit of knight armor steps in front of the prinnies, a greatsword over one shoulder. The face underneath the helmet is dessiciated in undeath. It brings one arm up and makes a 'come at me bro' gesture with one hand before dodging rolling into them!

The Space Marine gasps as his body is suddenly reknit, lifting both hands up to his face. "Oh my god. I wasted so much of my life fighting the useless war against the unending army of aliens coming at me. I... want to be a baker! I WILL BE A BAKER! YAAAAAAARGH!" The huge Terran Space Marine stands up, slamming his gun towards the alarmingly hot motorcycle mouse driving towards him and blasting bullets into them!

Kukuru's face slices open wide as the stopsign cleaves through bone and sinus, ripping up flesh and bone. It slowly slides back out with a sluuuuuhck as the Terminator's arm goes limp, looking down at the claw piercing through his power core.

"I...will return."

The man stands back up. "Oh! Oh god, let's go! Aisle 30 is this way!" He points, though doesn't run quite ahead of Kukuru.
Kukuru Kukuru gurgles incoherently at first, mostly from the pain of having her face cut open in a rather painful way, but she eventually makes a sound of vague approval towards the Space Marine realizing his newfound purpose in life. That just leaves the matter of the Terminator in her grasp, and she waits until she has most of her mouth back in place before finally speaking up again.

"Make sure to behave next time." And then she yeets it backwards before moving ahead with the moustache man, powerwalking aggressively without outright jogging so as to not get too far ahead of him. She even turns around several times in the process, hurrying/slowing down to regroup with the Prinnies once she spots her allies/ally's minions.

"Weren't there more of you?" She asks while powerwalking along, pausing to dig her claws into the ground so another (considerably more loin cloth'd) person trying to aggressively dodge roll at them (but fast) ramps right off of her claws and gets yeeted into the crowd before they can get a chance to backstab her in the unarmored every part of her body.

"Anyway. This man's helping us find the thing in aisle..." She gestures at Mister Moustache, then taps her chin lightly while trying to remember the number. It takes her a good half minute to recall it if he doesn't just say it. "Thirty... 'n?"
Hesinca The prinnies run onward into the store.

"Oh no! A blue laser, dood!"

As the prinny squad dwindles down to 8, Hesinca reappears briefly to berate them, emerging from the glowing floor tile.

"Hurry it up!" she yells, before disappearing again.

"CHARGE, DOOD!"

The prinnies run at the knight-

- and then attempt to dive between the knight's legs, getting around him that way.
Bowser The loin clothed man, looking ragged, covered in blood, and wielding an eleven foot slab of steel vaguely in the shape of a blade, rolls at Kukuru like a horrific wrecking ball. And then ramps up over the claws. He is sent hurtling into the air over Godzilla. The next kaiju shriek is cut short by the drop attack piercing his skull and bringing him to the ground, finishing off the entire army of pokemon battlers.

The Knight stands, bringing forward a shield like a mountain wall. It stands nearly as tall as the knight, runes covering the edges. It reeks of ancient lore, of a world long past. Every attack would bounce off this shield, every blow deflected by the might of this shield that has stood up to a thousand wars, fought dragons, slain many undead.

The prinnies roll under the knight easily and meet up with Dad and Kukuru as the Knight slowly rotates in place to meet them.

The house wife slam her lance through his back, dropping him to the ground.

"Oh, hi!" The moustached man waves to the penguins, "I'm Tom, and we just need to go down to Aisle Three Hundred and Two." He points down the aisles to a cardboard cutout down the lane of Aisles.

The same one that a massive man in a hockey mask and a man in a jumpsuit and white mask start walking down.
Kukuru "Three hundred and two? I thought it was thirty..." Kukuru slumps a bit as she hears that considerably bigger number than what she was told earlier, probably because the difference between thirty and three oh two is going to involve a hell of a lot more walking through violent crowds getting in their way!

"... Oh. Wait. I can just... Come, come~" She holds her claws out towards Tom and the Prinnies, helpfully waiting for them to grab on as another cloud of ominous dark magic floats in front of them. Once everyone's firmly attached, she heads right on through to cheat-teleport right on over to that aisle where Hockey Mask and Jumpsuit disappeared into. With any luck, they might still be able to cut them off with the clawed housewife(?) being the biggest obvious target next to Dad and Prinny Kids!

She won't be the first to swing, at least, but she's fully prepared to be the last if it comes to a fight. Stupid strength and murder claws are good for that sort of thing.
Hesinca The prinnies eagerly and gladly take the assist.

"Shit, it's a json(), dood," says one of the prinnies, pointing at the hockey mask.

"Quick, Kukuru!" says one of the other prinnies. "You gotta throw that prinny at the mask dudes!"

"Dood, why me?" says the sacrificial prinny.

"It's a big sacrifice to make, dood, but we're proud of you for making it!"

"Wait, no, I didn't decide this dood!"

Half of the prinnies start squabbling amongst themselves, then one after the other end up losing their grip on the cloud, falling off, and exploding. At this point, there's just three left.
Kukuru A prinny suggests throwing one, and Kukuru also has to ask: "Why, though? I mean..." She flexes an arm to demonstrate her RIPPLING STREshe actually doesn't look like she's built like a truck. It's actually kind of unclear where all her strength comes from, actually, since it's not detectable as any kind of funky magic or visible as bulging biceps.

She's just built different. "Don't worry. I'll make sure all... Um. All of who's left of you gets back home safe!"
Bowser A blue bird child is currently informing a deer in a christmas sweater about the Gilgamesh Official Action Figure With Official Gilgamesh NFT. "Well, you see, the NFT is actually very valuable, because you can always gain royalities on any additional s-" The prinny lands on him and he explodes with the prinny into a crater.
The deer stares blankly at the spot.

Kukuru cheats through several crowds of violent store goers who are battling each other to get to Aisle 302. Three thousand blue haired men and women bearing swords are swinging into each other with martial expertise. A nearby Aisle explodes with very lights and symbols as the kung fu teenagers utilize their plastic toys, the kitchen appliance section turning into a crater of various symbols and lights.

Indeed, Kukuru teleports terribly close to the stand. There it is. A single Official Gilgamesh Action Figure With Official Gilgamesh NFT on a set of shelves.
Oh hey, and right next to it, Cooling 400 Thread Count Bamboo Sheets for only 20 credits!

_____$_#1950_

Json() walks from behind the shelf after reality jitters, immediately swinging the axe in hand at Tom, which sinks to the eye in his chest. "O-oh."

The man in the white mask comes steadily from behind towards the Prinnies.
Kukuru Although Kukuru had not been above cheating at the start of this whole thing... Screw it, these people are nuts. Of course she's going to teleport past a bunch of them! With the prize in sight, she approaches it while keeping her claws wrapped gently around the handflaps of the prinnies still with her. Only upon getting close enough to see it does she finally

Ooh, cooling thread. "That'd be great for the higher bed... It gets really sweaty close to the ceiling." Yep, snagging some of that. That distraction, though, means Tom gets axe'd a... Asked him a...

Tom gets his chest caved in, and Kukuru does not look amused. "Rude. You stop that." One claw goes towards Tom to try and extract the axe so she can heal his gaping wound before all of his blood stops being inside of his body. The other claw swings that package of Cooling 400 Thread Count Bamboo Sheets at Json() like it's a cinderblock, but with enough force (and also a big dumb claw) behind it to make it feel like a truck full of cinderblocks!

She may have to grab another package after that because even impeccably made sheets renowned for durability aren't meant to withstand this kind of force in a single moment. She'll also have to leave the grabbing of the thing to the Prinnies for now if they can spot it before she recovers!
Hesinca "There it is! The - whatever that thing is, dood!" says prinny #1.

"Oh, don't worry about us, by the way, dood," says prinny #2. "We're immmortal or something, dood."

"Actually Hesinca never got around to sending in the upgrade app for that, dood," says prinny #3.

"... Welp, we're boned, then, dood."

And then there's an opening-

The prinnies dive for the figurine, trying to get their mitts on it-
Bowser The axe comes out and Tom gasps, as the blood slides back in. "Oh no! I forgot to tell my wife what to do with my precious moments figurines! Thank you!"

The Hockey Mask man looks at the axe coming out, then up. Taller than Kukuru, and built powerfully, he is like a pillar of iron, one that brings out a Fantasy Costco Brand +1 Flaming Scimitar. Fire ripples up the blade as soon as it comes out. And then the solid black of cloth hits him. Jason is built to survive a hit by a truck. But a truck filled with cinderblocks? The pack of fine bedsheets slams into his midsection and there's a barely audible WOOF of breath from him as he is sent into a shelf of VCR TV combos.

The man in the jumpsuits grabs one of the prinny, attempting to bring his hands down around the bulging spot above its shoulders where a neck SHOULD be. His iron grip is inexorable, pulling down. It is rather hard to strangle something without a neck.

As one of the Prinnies grabs the box, an armored associate in power armor steps up, body covered in various colors of gore and viscera and whatever organs ponies have in them.. "Alright, that will be 59.99, do you want the extended warranty?"
Kukuru "Figurines...? Oh. Yeah, you should be more careful not to do that, then." Kukuru says with a reaffirming nod, not quite understanding the significance of that bit but sounding reassuring nonetheless! Especially about not getting axe-murdered. She believed in it strongly enough to bash Json() into a whole shelf of TVs, after all!

She also makes sure to grab another set of the sheets. "Just in case that one's... Hm." When she thinks nobody's looking (without trying too hard to look just in case), she puts that first weaponized set back. Then she might only have to pay for the fresh, undamaged one!

Alas, Jumpsuit Man goes for a Prinny to try and choke it out. Kukuru clearly doesn't approve of this behavior, as she grabs for one of his arms around the armpit and starts pulling. "Hey, you. Stop that. That's not nice." She's moving her arm slowly, at least, so there's plenty of time to release the Prinny or even try to escape, but her pulling force is otherwise constant enough to potentially cause some arm-to-torso connectivity problems should he be stubborn about holding on.

Kukuru and her claws are also covered in blood, so that might help sell her message a little bit more.
Hesinca There's not *really* a neck to be choked.

The prinny makes choking noises anyway, in accordance with cartoon logic.

"Um - um, our boss has the money - Mistress Hesinca Dood!"

The armored centaur demon makes her grand entrance in a suitably ungrand way. "What?"

"We've got the thing, dood!"

Hesinca peers at it. "Gilgamesh... NFT version? What? No. I wanted you to get the limited edition Questbuy candy treats, remember?"

She pulls out a flyer and waves it in front of the prinny holding the box.

"... Um, dood, that's from a different store... and from valentines' day. Dood."

"... Oh. Huh. Well, damn. Now I'm pissed off. That things looks nice and breakable, I'm gonna smash it," says Hesinca, grabbing the box and going to stomp on it.
Bowser The cashier is standing RIGHT THERE, KUKURU. The cashier also doesn't seem to care. He is standing in his power armor, boredly, looking straight ahead, knowing that he gets minimum wage for this. The vague joy of having chainsawed a rabid pony in half has gone, and now he is left with only ennui.

The Jumpsuited Man tilts his head slightly, trying to choke the prinny, but being truly unable to find a wind pipe. There's a distinct snapping noise, then the tearing of meat and cartilege as the arm separates entirely and he finally turns to notice Kukuru having ripped his arm off. He looks at the arm, then at her, the emotionless Kirk mask trained on her. He drops the Prinny, and considers this situation.

The cashier speaks up, "That'll be 20 credits, man, do you want the extended warranty?"

The box goes on the ground and Hesinca's foot goes over it. Time draws close as all faces turn towards the box. From on top of one of the shelves, thirty people kicking Chuck Norris to death turn around and stare as Hescina's foot travels slowly down.

A large cybernetic man wielding a katana made of light takes a deep breath to shout.

Tom's face twists and he turns into a cloud of smoke, weaving around the box. As Hescina's foot comes down, the form of a tall bald man with long spidery fingers, holds the box in one hand. "BEHOLD! I, LORD VOLDEMORT, HAVE THE TOY I RIGHTFULLY DESERVE!"

He swings a wand of elderwood around his head, turning into another wreathing pillar of smoke that starts to explode through the ceiling.

Everyone looks at the hole in the ceiling. The black robed figure of Garfield appears, "Oh no! He is getting away! You had better all follow him and try to kill him! He has the only Official Gilgamesh Action Figure With Gilgamesh Official NFT left! And you should take some complimentary runed Fantasy Costco weapons with you! Only 10.99."
Hesinca Hesinca picks up one of the complimentary weapons and examines it casually.

"Questbuy's is better," she says to the armored store associate, shoving it back into his hands.

"Anyway what's an NFT?"

One explanation later...

"... So there'll be a digital record forever of this thing that I'm going to destroy?"

"Actually, dood, it's a record of ownership, you see in this post-scarcity world, dood, scarcity is-"

"Nope, don't care, now I *have* to destroy it."
Kukuru The cashier might be right there, but... Hey, it was the other guy that broke the first set! Kukuru's just putting the thing away where it belongs so she can get one she can buy properly. As she fishes the twenty requested credits out of her pocket, however, she slaps Jumpsuit Man's arm back into place and reattaches it with the power of SCIENCE NANITE BULLSHIT.

"Now behave, okay? If you hurt my friends again, I won't fix you up this time." He gets a gentle pat on the shoulder to make sure everything's back in place, and then she hands the cash over to the cashier. "Nah, no extended warranty. I probably won't be doing anything that wears it out too..."

There's pause, and then she laughs and covers her face with her claws bashfully. "Anyway! Um... Just this is fine for now. I gotta..."

She looks over as the screaming bald man turns into smoke and rises through the ceiling. "Do we? Um. I already got what I was looking for, so..."

Alas, Hesinca really wants to break that thingy. She sighs lightly, then directs some nanites Hesinca's way. The healing part of that energy might not do much, but what if she was to make the centaur demon even BIGGER?

Surely nothing can go wrong with this plan.
Bowser The cashier sighs, knowing that the 5 credits he would have made on the sale of the extended warranty are done, but perhaps he did not actually need them anyways. As Kukuru eludes to not needing to 'rough' the sheets, the cashier stares off with a thousand yard stare. He makes a little 'yea, heh' face, as the nugget of a joke creeps into his stone features. "Thank you very much for shopping at Fantasy Costco. We've got a deal for you." He bags the sheets in a bag, tosses in a printed receipt, and goes back to coralling the various leaders of armies who are all their own parents and children out away from the section.

Mike looks down as the arm snaps back on and knits into place. The head turns towards Kukuru, and nods. Then over at Jason.

Jason nods back. He taps the brim of his hockey mask once towards Kukuru, putting his machete away, and the two men walk off down the aisle.

Garfield the Deals Warlock sniffs from his spot floating in mid air. "Well! That was great. Okay, go buy some TVs or something!" He waves at the demon and mom before disappearing in a cloud of dark magic.