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Kale Hearthward <B-anter> Kale Hearthward says, "Hey Cantio, what coordinates are you at?"
<B-anter> Cantio says, "Coordinates? Oh, that's... Where was that log? It's somewhere around here..."
<B-anter> Cantio says, with faint dripping noises in the background, "23554. You and Miss Grier and Rita should come by sometime. Just don't bring... Er."
<B-anter> Cantio says, "Good shoes."

The good news: Kale doesn't need to touch the ground.

The bad news: He's not here for a social visit.

Minutes after Cantio gives her coordinates, Kale emerges from the nearest warpgate, at speed, looking around as he takes to the skies. As soon as he sees signs of her, he changes course and heads that way, skimming closer to the ground.

"HEY, NERD!" he calls, as soon as he's within shouting range. "I'M HERE TO WRECK YOUR STUFF!"

And then he pulls his arm back and hurls a windball at her as he flies by, causing a blast of high pressure air wherever it lands.
Cantio The meat zone is... Well,meaty. There's grass (made of meat), lakes (made of meat), and prefab buildings (made of regular building materials but meat's creeping up one of the walls). Outside, there's some animals grazing about in a pen (all made of meat), and it's actually kind of peaceful despite the gross feeling to it all.

A charcoal grill is set up beside the building, and there's no traces of meat growth on it yet. It looks unused, as if it's been recently placed.

As if expecting Kale, she comes out of the prefab looking a little less white and purple, and a lot more lab-coated with those long waterproof summer pants that make the plasticy noise whenever the legs rub together. She might be taking a page from something else she's seen, and she's got her attention split between that rapidly approaching figure of Kale and a tablet as she monitors some kind of meat substance from a camera. "Oh! Hearthward. Good thinking. Maybe I-"

Oh hell, he's attacking! Caught entirely off guard, Cantio gets blasted back several yards as the windball hits her head on, flipping her over a few times until she skids along the ground with one (gloved) hand slowing her to a stop. It'd almost look cool if it didn't sound disgusting.

"What are you...? Oh, fine! If that's how you want it...!" Dragging her fingers along the ground, Cantio flicks upwards at Kale as some sparks of light materialize arounds him, doing... Nothing! Because a whole goddamn claymore made of Cantio's trademark purple plasticky metal comes flying out from behind him in a wide arc, veering towards Cantio's hand and aimed at cutting into him on its path.
Kale Hearthward Kale goes to dodge out of the sparks, and right into the path of the boomerang. He has to course-correct again, to stay out of the way. So this isn't going to be as one-sided as he was thinking, after all...

"Why is there meat!" he yells, as he makes a sharp turn in mid-air, approaching her for another strafing run.

He launches his next attack not directly at her - but at the charcoal grill, aiming the blast so that it'll send the grill flying directly at her.

"I don't know what you're trying to do here, but I won't let you advance the Concord's agenda!" he vows, as he takes cover behind a nearby meat tree.
Cantio "I...! Don't know!" Cantio shouts back out, still sounding bewildered despite clearly being here for quite some time already. Everything reeks of meat, her coat has a noticeable number of stains on it both old and new, and her hair...

Actually, it's hard to see it in her hair thanks to it already being pink.

With her sword in hand, Cantio does a sick twirl with it before readying it at her shoulder with the tip pointed at Kale, and she braces for impact when the blast... Doesn't come anywhere near her. The grill catches her off guard, though, as it smashes right into her side and sends her staggering sideways while the component pieces all tumble out.

"Tch... I was going to use that! I thought we were working together on this project!" She snaps again, gripping the weapon tightly with both hands as she rushes towards Kale and his meat tree cover. Instead of trying to maneuver around it to get a better slashing angle at Kale, though...

Cantio just swings for the fences, stomping just before her swing to really put her weight and hips into the power-focused swing. The meat tree actually resists her blade somewhat, but it's more like a really tough meat (with some dense bones in the middle) rather than an actual tree that's fully solid all throughout.
Kale Hearthward "I'm working with Lowell, sure!" calls Kale. "But at what point did I say I was working with *you*?"

He's expecting the attack. He's not expecting the attack to come through the *tree*. "What-"

He manages to get clear enough that the sword slice doesn't hit him directly, but he gets smacked down by a huge chunk of tree, sending him tumbling to the ground.

"Ugh... meat... and it's *juicy*."

Kale's no longer strictly vegan, but he's... still not *entirely* fond of meat. Especially when it's in, um, tree form. Ground form. Everything form?

He focuses in Cantio's direction, draws in a deep breath, and exhales harshly - sending not only a hurricane-strength blast of wind her way, but the chunks of meat tree she just cut down, and a bunch of other juicy meaty debris as well.
Cantio "So am I! This is like you're.. Sabotaging him! Indirectly." Cantio calls back out as she brings her sword back to her front sliding her front foot around a few times to get a better feel for the lack of proper friction on that meaty ground. The air itself is not unlike being in a meat locker, but the smell is...

Actually, it's still kind of bad, but at least it's not rotting. Weirdly enough, none of this meat seems to be rotting despite the existence of so much meat implying that some of it should be a lot worse.

"I mean... Unless this is part of his testing, too. If it is..." Cantio doesn't finish her thought right away as Kale sends his hurricane winds and meat chunks all around, drawing a startled cry from Cantio when the meat tree smashes into her and sends her careening backwards before tumbling underneath it to let it roll off from atop her.

"... Then I hope you don't mind me returning the favor!" She threatens despite still being on her own turf at the moment, and she punches the ground as a clone in a nurse's outfit pops out of nowhere to start rushing at Kale with a giant syringe-shaped sword. She takes a few rapid swings at him before she's abruptly replaced by the actual Cantio, continuing that same flurry before thrusting it downwards in a feint and slashing upwards to try and catch him with a meat-juice'd blade!
Kale Hearthward "I'll send him a 'Sorry for killing Cantio' fruit basket!" calls Kale. "He'll understand!"

He quickly pulls one of his swords, bringing it up to parry each strike, but gets caught off guard by the actual Cantio appearing to deliver a finishing blow.

"Ugh..." he takes back to the air, a cut appearing across his middle, red seeping in through his outfit - he didn't quite manage to get away quite in time.

"I'd say 'get used to it, Cantio, this is the frontier...'"

He breathes into the hilt of his sword, causing it to start spinning like a giant drill.

"... If I wasn't expecting you to run with your tailfeathers between your legs!"

He drops back down, bringing his sword down and across her position in a grinding slam!
Cantio "That's not a thing anyone sells!" Cantio continues her shouting match with Kale as she slides the tip of her sword against the ground to get some of the blood and meat  juice off, not quite realizing she's only making her sword bloodier and ominous-looking in the process. "Fruit baskets are usually more generic than 'sorry for murdering a business partner'!"

Fortunately or unfortunately, it seems the shouting match will continue with the fight as Kale brings his drill sword down at Cantio. Seeing herself in a rather disadvantageous position, she brings her own weapon up to block it only momentarily as pieces from it start getting shorn off by the drill. By the time her sword comes apart, she's only able to avoid getting the drill punched right through her chest, although she still suffers some nasty cuts and gashes from it coming down against her arm and side before she can push herself away.

"And I don't have feathers! Or a tail! But if I did..." Instead of falling back, she goes right back at Kale despite only holding the handle of her sword.

"It'd probably look better than yours, anyway!" As she brings it up in another slicing motion, however, a laser blade springs to life from the hilt. It makes a suspiciously familiar noise as it does, and it flares up with each swing as the fragments of the solid blade flow back into it as though making it burn hotter and brighter.
Kale Hearthward "You aren't looking in the right shops!" claims Kale.

Cantio's sword flares brightly. He braces himself, and tries to block it - and it *melts* Periactus in his hands. "F- fuck!"

He drops the melted drill, causing the ground to sizzle where it lands. "Okay - enough of this."

He inhales.

He inhales further.

And then he breathes - letting it all out at once, at dragon force intensity.

If his lungs and beak weren't occupied, there might be a reference to blowing Cantio's house down - though, no, he's not that punitive.
Cantio The lasers hit their mark, but they still aren't quite enough. With so much energy spent on getting the lasers to flare up, Cantio's looking a bit spent by the time Kale starts inhaling far more than she'd expect anyone to be able to. Gathering what she can in the tank, she braces her sword in front of herself again as the sword solidifies enough to punch it into the ground, hoping to withstand those gales.

It doesn't quite work as expected. Instead of weathering the storm, Cantio instead gets flung backwards by the breath blast, the grill pieces long forgotten while she's busy getting thrown across the meaty ground and slammed into a (thankfully) meat-covered prefab wall that just barely softens the impact.

For the wall, anyway. Cantio's not so lucky, as she just slams right into it and slumps over between it and the ground. She still has her hold on her sword, but she doesn't look like she's in any shape to be getting back up just yet.
Kale Hearthward Kale takes a moment to catch his breath (literal), and take stock of the situation.

"... Ugh, that took too long... Her allies are probably on the way."

He winds up and throws another windball - not at Cantio, but at her monitoring equipment specifically, intending to mess it up as much as he can, and then turns and starts jetting back towards the warpgate before someone intercepts him.

And thus, the first blow of the new expedition was struck...
Cantio The windball takes out a handful of Cantio's monitoring devices atop the prefab structure, scattering some devices and wrecking others from the impact or ensuing fall even on the meaty ground. It's certainly going to strike a blow against her research efforts in this area in the short run, if not necessarily in the long run.

The long term damage will be mostly against her pride. She'll need some more time to get back up from this, although she's probably not going to forget it anytime soon.