Scene #8489: Help Without Empathy

Owner	Pose
Angela	Angela does NOT invite Ishirou to Lobotomy Corp but he can ask for an invite and be allowed in. Angela warns that she's really not going to protect him from Petra if they have a run-in because she has more important things to do with her time than participate in the forever war (it's been over a century of time for her. Even without her time powers it'd feel like about that much). She does set up a meeting room with Malkuth and herself that Ishirou will be escorted to by... BETTY! "BETTY! is happy to have so many visitors lately! BETTY! gets to help so many people, like you!" And then she giggles a high pitched tonal laugh that kind of sounds like a twelve year old girl giggling into an autotuner. She doesn't enter with Ishirou though. The doors close shut behind Ishirou. Angela stares down the length of the table while Malkuth, standing next to her, waves a hand. "Hey Ishi! What can we help you with?"
Ishirou	It's hard to place it but... Something in Ishirou has changed. Not a complete change, but something has tipped. It's not obvious which way things will fall, but for the first time, it almost looks as if something has meaningfully tipped the right way. However... Angela would likely know things can fall either way even if they are slightly tipped one way. He's walking with Betty, nodding along with her. "You sound like you like helping. I'm glad... Oh here is my stop. Nice to meet you Betty!" he says before dipping inside. He looks at both Angela and Malkuth, and gives each a small wave and smile. With him, POD is floating. "Hey. I... well wanted to see how you were doing, Malkuth... and..." he looks at Angela. "I owe you an explanation. I..." he says sucking in a breath. "I'm sorry I wasn't more honest with you about how... I am. It's..." he pauses. "It's not an excuse but... it is part of a desire to want to be perceived as human. It's... my vision, my ability to analyze data... scan things... it's something I do for..." He rubs his face. "It is part of who I am. Even if you remove what I feel I /should/ be... It's... something I can't hide... and I was wrong to hide it. I was also wrong to use it in the way I did..." "I've caught on that you can see the world slowly, take much much longer than we can.." he says openly about it. "I on the other hand... learned to see the world as bits of data. As things to learn... as curiosities. Even people. I... somewhere along the way let my perceptions get twisted into this." "But I also wanted to hide that from other people... because humans aren't like that. They're... open and emotional, and they don't just see people as objects or data... I just.." "Wanted to pretend... but I didn't really internalize it. There has always been this duality. Wanted to be more emotionally capable, but also acknowledge that I could... cheat and look into things. Maybe that's why with Petra I was always caught out, I didn't understand her because I couldn't... read her." "...There is a lot I don't know. I keep saying to myself I can figure it out... if only I could pull the layer back a bit better... but.." he sighs, "People aren't like that. It's... scary to engage with someone and... hurt them... when you weren't trying to..." "But it was selfishness. I didn't want to help them, I wanted to understand them... to be praised. To feel... like I am a person... it's..." "Hard to be this honest with myself. Honestly, I couldn't blame you if you called Petra in right now to finish what she started... and you'd be right to do so." "I... want to try and be better. To help you... you both. Because Angela, you were right. I didn't internalize the lesson with Malkuth. Not until the idea of people seeing my dead body was etched into my head. That... I was hurting them by being so selfish. I... want to make amends but I'm not sure how." "Should... I just... stay in this form? Should I not go back to what I want? I..." he looks up. "I honestly don't know what is right. Both of you understand this... understand me better. Probably the most out of anyone I know. I... can't go on living like this. Hurting them... hurting you."
Angela	Angela listens. She is, somehow, a good listener. It comes part and parcel with her ability to see what makes a person tick so she can make them suffer in the neccessary ways. Ishirou isn't a target but once you learn something it can be hard not to ue it. To this extent, she can understand something about how Ishirou might feel compelled to ''scan'', especially if he felt so attached to being a Scannerbot, so to speak. Despite this, she does get a little lost here--largely in trying to figure out what Ishirou is getting at. Eventually she starts to realize this is something approaching an apology but Angela decides, in this moment, that before she engages this apology--there is something that Ishirou failed to apologize for even if he may have apologized for surrounding sentiments. Malkuth starts to speak but Angela raises a hand to stop her. "A moment please." Malkuth's Meltdown is done so Angela has no reason to fuck with her anymore. "Ishirou. You told me something about Petra that I did not wish to know. You told her something that she should have been able to choose to tell me herself. I understand wanting to help others, I can even understand about the importance of acting when you believe someone is in danger--But tell me the process you chose in dealing with this information, and what you believe you did wrong. I suggest not leaving anything out. But I am going to ask that you do not tell me of anything else Petra may have done. I don't need to know about her crimes--literal or otherwise--honestly, anything I deserve to know--Lilian or Petra can tell me. Do not tell them to me either. Instead, I want to know how you acted. I want you to tell me how precisely you used the information you got from Petra. I do not need any extra information about her." "Do we have an understanding, Ishirou?"
Ishirou	Ishirou listens, making sure to commit to everything Angela is saying to him so that he can't misinterpret it. "...Oh," he says with some realization. "Okay. Sorry... let me..." He thinks, hard, trying to parse what he did in such a way he doesn't say anything about Petra that Angela shouldn't know. "Yes, we have one, Angela." "I... had just suffered one of my first huge blows thanks to Eggman. We were at a party I was hosting to show off my cooking skills and..." he says, trying to remember things, but also trying and keep things right. "Was just harrassed by one of his minions... there was something happening outside when Petra left so I decided to follow her.." "I learned something, that concerned me and I thought it was putting her in danger... but I didn't understand the underlying situation very well. I interpreted it as... harm." "I wanted to help her, but she asked me not to tell anyone... but instead of listening to her I.." he pauses... "Told Hibiki. I thought maybe she could get through to her... and when she couldn't I thought I should share this with other Paladins, because... at the time I thought I could..." "That I could be the one to save her, not because I thought she needed the help. I..." he hangs his head. "Only am really good at this. I wanted to be a hero... to be someone praised and acknowledged as being a person worthy of respect and love... and..." "I... tried to get that at Petra's expense."
Angela	Angela listens again. Almost as patiently as before, even. She thinks about how she's about to MEET Eggman but ultimately sets aside that thought. She has no particular desire to harm Ishirou yet so that is, essentially, between them. "My--creator. He also wishes to save his world, so to speak. That's how he sees it." Angela says. "But you know from Malkuth how well that went. In truth, that man's desire to fulfill this project is because of the loss he feels for a woman he admired and loved. Even that might sound reasonable, but ah--that is the problem isn't it? He is doing this on behalf of a loved one--not because he particularly cares about the outside world. Carmen cared, perhaps, but that's another matter." Angela crosses one leg over the other, resting her hands in her lap. "While everything you said is true, that in of itself is only a part of the issue. Even if none of that was true, even if you only had good intentions and no desire for personal reward--you still would have failed because you acted without empathy for Petra. You saw something you saw as harmful to her and you dragged it out into others despite her requests--but even if she had made no such requests, you shouldn't have mentioned it to anyone until you understood ''why'' Petra harmed herself--Do not tell me the answer as to why if you have figured out the why since. I am going to guess that you did not have a long talk in private with Petra on this matter and instead figure that upon your first stumbling block you approached Hibiki, then the Paladins." She frowns. "And perhaps you hadn't noticed, but also the public band of the multiverse."
Ishirou	"...I thought I was doing it with the best intentions at the time. That's the sad part," Ishirou says to Angela. "But... if I did I wold have exercised patience. I would have been cautious... I wouldn't have immediately given up the first time I didn't understand... I would have tried to understand no matter how long it took." "...It... did..." he finally realizes. He takes a breath. "I'm sorry, you... shouldn't have heard that." He also listens about the man who has done all of this, but not for himself, or a belief... but for someone he cared about. "...Is that why it keeps failing? Because it's not because he wants it, but because it's something he /thinks/ she wanted? He doesn't even want it for himself, but would do anything to make a wish happen, based on his understanding of another?" He rubs his face. "I realize... right now, that I /do/ care. That's why I hate it more. That... even despite what happened between us, I don't want anyone... to suffer. I know what it's like to suffer, I... faced ego death... no, not even I can say that.." "He faced Ego death... I was created from the scraped remains of that Ego... am I him? Is he me..? That's..." he pauses, "Not important right now. I... want there to be less suffering. I just thought that I could..." "I could math it out, you know? Just had to figure out all the variables, and know all the things... but... it's arrogance. Kind of like your creator. I'm..." "I'm sorry you have to suffer because of that. That you had to watch me do that to people you care about. I..." he pauses, swallowing, "Even if they never forgive me, they need to never suffer again. ...And you deserve to get a life that isn't this." "Both of you," he says more focused on both Angela and Malkuth. "Two people who have saved me from doing the worst evils imaginable to those who I love."
Angela	"I don't know," Angela says. "All I know is the suffering unleashed in the pursuit of a good act. The phrase 'The road to hell is paved with good intentions' is a truism for a reason. In the end, people don't neccessarily want others to solve their problems--they might, of course, but more commonly I found--they want to feel cared for." Malkuth kind of laughs a little, embarrassed at the idea that they deserve a life that 'isn't this'. "Technically Elijah had one. She is the one who threw it away carelessly. Usually that's the end you get. You're on your third, aren't you Ishi?" Angela says, "It feels like you want to be human to me. We had this discussion so I won't rehash it. Perhaps the path to that won't come as easily to you this time as it did the first time but..." Angela shrugs both shoulders. "Tough break. Perhaps now that it is a harder road, you will appreciate it more. That isn't neccessarily so bad. Only you can decide what you are, though. That's how identity works. Struggle with it as we all do, then decide and once you decide... Do not try to reverse it." "You can reverse time but not a tale after all." Malkuth murmurs. Then she brightens. "Ahah, I'm not sure what we did...but thanks! I'm also not sure if we're helping now but---uh... Was there something else you wanted to talk about?"
Ishirou	"...Yeah, if I can get it back this time... I will cherish it. I will..." he says, calmly. "But you're not Elijah, Malkuth. Nor am I the man that created me. Nor... is Angela anyone but Angela. So I think you deserve something better than this." 'You can reverse time but not a tale after all.' "That's... true. And... care..." he thinks, looking down. "I think that's true. People want care, to have a place to feel safe as they deal with their own lives. There is a lot I have to learn and think about. ...But I won't run away from it anymore. I won't put my views above the truth... or my desires above what others need." 'Was there something else you wanted to talk about?' "Oh yes. Actually, I wanted to talk about the upcoming meltdown with Hod. I think you should work with a communications system that works outside of what you have established. This way Hod can't do what you did.." he motions to Malkuth, "To misdirect and send agents off into dangerous situations." "If I am given enough time, I can also provide the agents on duty with powers similar to my own. It'll help keep them safe..." he says, placing his hands on the table. "...And I wanted to apologize for what I was saying the other day. I did... subject you and the corporation to my views, without considering what you go through. Though some of that requires me to apologize to someone else.." He pauses and then looks at Malkuth, "...And how are you feeling? I really didn't check back up on you, and... I just wanted you to know that I'm really still here for you. To listen, and... talk to if you need a shoulder." To Angela, "I hope you can be human one day. When you are... when you achieve that..." he says with a smile, "Then I will make you a meal to remember." "Until then.." he says, placing a data cube on the table. "It's not much, but it's the sensation of eating something. Also walking out there in the world. I think the one I recorded was working in Candy's garden and then taking a stroll through the nearby woods. It's not the same as doing it yourself, but..." "Hopefully it can tide you over until you can experience it all for yourself. Tell me if you want more, and I can do this again."
Angela	"That seems reasonable." Angela says of utilizing the outside communication system. "At least for Hod but there's no reason to worry about the others just yet." Angela knows that Hod's challenge isn't really the same as Malkuth's challenge but it'll be good if they are at ease that the orders aren't being tampered with at the very least so there's no reason to disallow it. Tough to see how that could go wrong. Angela doesn't seem to have a strong opinion about Ishirou's ability to 'share powers'. She isn't going to overtly endorse it or say 'no thanks' to that but she does say, "I do not suggest breaking into the manager's office again but provided you are responsible with what you share, I have no objection--just be careful--Agents have been known to panic and use their abilities to harm their comades." Malkuth is less stern as a rule but she does say, "Oh! I'm alirght right now. I mean, everybody did listen. It's a little early for me to start complaining again! It's not like any of you aren't just trying your best. Bikki was really sweet to Hod." ''I hope yuo can be human one day'' Angela frowns. "Please do not presume my desire or my identity." She had no idea he was a chef though. Whatever she is, Angela thinks, it's someone who wants to eat food. Angela is less resistant to 'the sensation of eating something' now that she ''had'' her dinner with Lilian, but she's still hesitant--last time she ate something, she had a strong reaction. Maybe in privte once she's ready. She's not sure she is right now. The sensation of walking out there in the world. SHe definitely better not. Not yet. "I'll consider it." She has no idea how to activate it but she's not going to just admit that. "Is there anything else?" Angela asks.
Ishirou	Ishirou scratches the back of his next, "Sorry, you're right, I didn't mean it like that. ...Then I hope you find what you want...and get to keep that happiness." He offers honestly. "Oh and... there is a data port on one of the sides of the cube, it should interface with anything local. Maybe. If not I can send over an adaptor." As for agents... "Well the good thing is I have control over the OPTIONs, so I can disable it or even use it to remotely try and suppress them. Though... if enough of that happens I think the safe thing would be to disable the system.." he considers. "No, and... thank you." To Malkuth he smiles, "I'm glad to hear she was. And... maybe? Don't hold it all in either." He stands up, "...I should get out of here before Petra knows I'm here. But... I am glad to have met both of you."