Scene #8793: A Quiet Night With The Foggy Thoughts

Owner	Pose
Touta Konoe	In a modern world like most others, there exists emergency responders of a unique variety. Though these responders aren't provided as a public service, but as contracted services through which government agencies have created collaborations for their assistance. That is the world to which he hoped to find Hamada Haru. With his experience of Haru, he's come to know a few things. He's a person that is blunt but direct, an individual that doesn't tend to speak often but when he does it's filled with meaning and purpose, and in the time he's seen him during the events in Lampport is that this wasn't just with his words. His actions were filled with the same level of purpose. A person that concealed his presence within fog. There's more than one reason that he's decided to reach out. That said, Touta's come to a conclusion about attempting such an act... Even without a background in the Watch further highlighting his abilities to keep his tracks covered, he is a person that you don't find but rather chooses to let you do so.For that reason, as Touta first arrived into this world that was not so uncommon from others so eerily similar, he'd been contemplating how to make his presence known. It couldn't have been reliable to search aimlessly within the city. Even bringing up the name might have been taboo, or against Haru's wishes. He could maybe try to garner that man's attention by sending a signal of fog of his own but... "Last thing I need to do is make more people think I'm trying to cause trouble..." Thus his course of action fell to two immediate choices in his mind. An attempt to look about the city for any mention of places notorious for his fog, or the sounds of swarming creatures in the distance or...Sending Hamada Haru a private contact. That contact had only the coordinates of a space near the outskirts of the city, a time, a brief message 'Want to meet in person,' and the name of the sender, Touta Konoe. One could imagine that if he wanted to talk, just over the radio should have sufficed. But Touta was trying to have intention with his own actions as well. To emulate this person in some regard. A discreet location within his world, an attempt to respect privacy, but also to show an intent to reach out to Dynamic Era. A brief message that expressed a desire, but didn't elaborate further till the two met. No responses sent to anything that might follow. As well as a name...So that Hamada Haru could decide if this was a person he wanted to bother meeting in the first place. Even before that time would come, Touta found himself at the designated spot hours beforehand. An area that seemed opportune for camping, a few certain areas of open space all surrounded by a sea of trees. The sounds of city traffic non-existent with only the sounds of nature ringing in the ear, though just low enough that one could continue to be aware of impending interlopers. Private enough for a quiet conversation, but not so quiet that an interruption couldn't be noticed. That was the place he had set for this place. Yet, even before that time there's a look of unease on Touta's expression. It wasn't out of fear of being attacked. He never considered that person to strike first without reason, and especially against someone who had come unarmed. "...You know what you're here to say...And if he asks his own questions..." A tiny pep-talk is given to himself as he looks at his phone, the designated time of arrival was soon to come. But even if Haru was late, he intended to wait. Not just for a few minutes after the fact, but for hours even. Even should the sun fall, and the stars begin to litter the sky, he'd linger in this spot till the day passed and the dawn came again.
Hamada Haru	'Where is Hamada Haru?' is a question that admits a surprisingly easy answer. He roams around leisurely in a small camper, usually within the confines of relatively "21st century Earth" worlds. He's never very far from Twin Peaks in terms of warpgates, and when he feels like simply disappearing the camper is often left behind almost entirely in favor of his motorcycle. Still, what he does most of the time is... nothing. He exists among people, checks out food stalls, stares at a lake or the sky or the sea. His willingness to engage locals is above-average for such a seemingly aloof elite, and his interactions with them tend to be kinder than his interactions with other elites. Mostly. Contact was made mere moments after he wandered away from an ice cream stand, a cone and azuki bean ice cream in hand. It was so hot out that by the time he was done reading the minimalist contents that his fingers were already obnoxiously sticky. Heaving an irritated sigh, Haru carried on for a while after. It was his motorcycle that arrived later, ascending up out of the earth in quasi-material form before solidifying with its rider. Untransformed and with a decidedly neutral expression only somewhat obfuscated by his helmet, Haru turns the motorcycle off and slides over to sit on the exterior of the sidecar, exchanging his helmet for a large bottle of water that was stowed within. "Although the location shows thought and attention... this isn't a date, so there's no real credit on offer for it," he says. It could be a joke, but it probably isn't. "Speak."
Touta Konoe	Haru's arrival is, without a doubt, unconventional. There were a lot of ways that Touta could have seen his appearance happening. Casually coming in from the woods, arriving from the fog he makes, maybe even forming from that swam he has. But... "The hell?! Not like there's credit for the jump scare either, ya know!" From the moment that he pops out of the ground on that motorcycle, there's a brief moment that Touta thinks himself from being safe in the woods to nearly becoming road-kill. Or as close to it as he could. That said...The anxiety, the anxiousness that had been on his expression if only for a moment as Haru rode through had seemingly been scared off into something more calm and natural (if not a bit more agitated for a moment) But that soon would subside like the heat. There's no doubt at least, whether transformed or not, that the person before him was indeed Hamada Haru. Though the first remark almost felt out of character from how he usually talks to others over the radio. Whether it was a joke or not. Still, hearing that 'speak' is enough to know this is the real deal, and while he's come here with enough courtesy, it's not with an unlimited patience. So Touta takes a small breath, composing himself where he'd been sitting. What appeared to be the remains of a tree stump only a few feet in height. A spot that provides him enough seat to squat, but leaves him having to keep looking up as he looks to Haru...Which after another moment's thought, he finds himself standing up if only so the two are looking face to face. "You are someone that understands people..." This is a statement that on the radio simply could have been responded to immediately with, 'That's a very simple thing to do.' Though, this wasn't the radio, and there's a certain gratefulness to that already coming in. "More than that...You've known when to step forward, and when to step back. You...make it a point to not say a lot, but enough that..." At this point, even Touta's starting to think he might be leaning into more of a 'this is getting eerily into date words...And on Valenti-- "...Oh my god, that is today isn't it..." At that realization, there's a look of existential dread of a whole new magnitude nearly appearing on his face, especially for what he's done... But he takes another breath, pulls himself back, and once again composes his words. Trying to be as serious as he can be. "Look, you're someone with a good moral compass, and I wanted to ask...On the Watch. I heard you were a part of it a while back, and wanted to know why you left it? What you think of it now. I don't need to know any spicy details, and I don't expect you to dish them out. But...I just wanted to hear your thoughts unfiltered without the rest of people trying to jump in, or turning it into a debate. I wanted to ask someone who's been there, and seen the best and worst of people there."
Hamada Haru	"'Come to this obscure place in person'," Haru paraphrases, sipping at his water. "I don't really expect trouble from you but it's not worth the bother of being wrong about it. Easier to just come in the way that is least convenient to a hypothetical ambush." Truthfully, he had simply become a more talkative person over time. Monosyllabic tendencies have largely fled him, or at the very least he reserves them for when he's tired and not feeling cooperative. //You are someone that understands people.// "No. I simply understand," he corrects, ambiguously. The rest goes unremarked on, including Touta's drift into realizing that it's Valentine's day. Haru wasn't really thinking about that a moment ago, but he doesn't feel a need to correct that. The days blur together, sometimes, when you spend as much time simply sitting and pondering as he does. And he's not a person with time for romance to begin with. On the other hand, the comical look of agitation that Touta wears draws out a mildly annoyed expression. "It's not very nice to look fearful of the possibility that you've made an accidental pass at another guy. Probably work on that." A misunderstanding, though. Haru wasn't a mind-reader, after all. The topic of the Watch elicits a drawn-out sigh. Haru kicks at the dirt in aggravation, glancing off towards the sky. "The Watch ceased to meet my standards of behavior when it permitted Petra to compromise it, and Xion was poorly treated there even before that happened, so I was on the cusp of leaving anyway. It was simply a matter of incompatibility." "Almost nobody here," he looks back down at Touta, "meets my standards, so for organizations it's practically impossible. What is more remarkable than my departure is that I was even with them to begin with."
Touta Konoe	His argument is sound in wanting to provide that least convenient method, and yet. "Still, I would have figured you'd have scouted it out or something. Jumping right in was definitely...Iunno...Different for sure. Still, you'd think I'd be use to something like that by now..." It's a thought that he too doesn't linger on much after the fact. If anything, he was here because he wanted to listen more. No. I simply understand, But he also needs to recall that even if Haru's become a more talkative person, this likely is one of those times where not feeling cooperative, and tired is likely to come in spades. It only reaches a bit of a peak when he calls out Touta on his expression.To which, he stops his train of thought...Takes a few moments to blink, and then with another realization speaks up again. "Ah, that's...Yeah, my bad..." He'd lower his head in a bow, keeping it there for a moment as he kept speaking. "No matter who I was throwing a pass to on accident like that...It'd definitely suck regardless." As he brings himself up, he gives off another low sigh, "Missing passes and fumbles have been a recurring theme lately." He doesn't attempt to push on that topic much either, again more here to listen, not to complain. He imagines that Haru certainly didn't come for that either. What he didn't imagine was the name that came to mind. "Petra, huh...? Was it just how they handled her compromising them or Petra herse--No, sorry, that's none of my business." The look on his face does show that there's a part of him curious to dig deeper though. But what comes next drowns out the first thought and makes him raise a brow. The mention of Xion's mistreatment a bit baffling, "Really...That's...Who'd do that? I barely knew her just before I left for a time but, she never seemed like someone that was the type to get under anyone's skin. Although..." 5r There's a quiet look of contemplation to him now, "I've been known not to understand things...Or people as well I think I do..." The mention of people comes long and drawn out, like being spoken not in a panic, but in a need to rectify the statement harshly. "...But Xion?" He doesn't interrupt any further than that, only continuing to gaze as Haru expresses his thoughts in earnest. It's actually kind of appreciated how much he was. It was kind of like seeing a different side of the guy than what he's seen on the radio, or even back in Lampport. It doesn't bring out a smirk or anything like that, but there's a smaller, more somber smile tracing Touta's lips now. "Well, after seeing how you handle things...And what you choose to handle on the radio...I imagine that you probably count the people that do on a single hand. But, I think at the very least I get the incompatibility thing..." For a long time he's held off on Factions himself. Always some sort of reasoning behind it, and now also the reason that he was claimed to be a fencesitter. Again, no words escape that thought, but the look in his eyes tells there's a thought that comes to pass. "Still, what kind of person would be compatible with them? Do you...Regret being there entirely? Think it's a place that can't be redeemable?" Touta finds himself starting to fireball a bit more questions. A part of him had wanted to make sure not to push things but even with the floundering from before, Haru's earnest words were genuinely being taken in stride. He could hopefully tell that Touta was trying to take in what he was saying. That what he had to say, his thoughts...He wanted to hear them. All of them. If he was still willing to let them be heard.
Hamada Haru	"There is no point in doing so at any point after you've contacted me with the location," Haru says, simply. With regards to the little bit of perceived rudeness, he just shrugs in answer to Touta's apology. Whether that's acceptance or simply acknowledgment is impossible to say. When Touta expresses an interest in details, he says, "The person you want to talk to about the failures of the Watch with regards to Petra is Tachibana Hibiki." Although he's trying to be helpful, Haru doesn't actually feel as if it's his place to elaborate on the topic of an internal matter like that one. The problem with the topic was that it would be hard to discuss without encroaching on confidential information within the Watch. Haru wasn't willing to risk accidentally spreading secrets, even if he was reasonably confident in his memory. //Who'd do that?// "Ask her," he says, disinclined to protect these people in particular but not willing to seize control of the issue on Xion's behalf even if it was a part of his calculus in departing from the Watch. The 'why' of it he could speculate on even less-- he didn't really get it, either. Xion was agreeable to practically everybody. While he nods, Haru says, "I'm not going to put a number to it. Things change, and fluctuate. You have to give people chances, know when it is meaningless to do so, and grasp that you might not know that for certain." //Still, what kind of person would be compatible with them? Do you...Regret being there entirely? Think it's a place that can't be redeemable?// Buying time to answer that by downing what remains in his water bottle, Haru discards it haphazardly into his sidecar with a pronounced rattle. "Terrorists, freedom fighters. Those for whom extreme action is rational, reasonable, and perhaps the only recourse still left. There is no redeemable or not redeemable. There are purposes, expectations, needs. Sometimes an improvised shotgun to center mass is called for. Such things aren't Kamen Rider's responsibility. If you are seeking a place, Paladins are society-builders and the Concord are are ambition elevators." "I have offered to assist the Paladins, but I do not have organizational loyalty to speak of at this point," he concludes. Lifting his left hand, he extends his index finger. "One more. Then I need to start the trip back home."
Touta Konoe	There's no attempts to deny it or defend the position. Simply take it in stride. Even the shrug isn't taken one way or another. The fact of the matter is that he should be apologizing. So it should be. Whether it's accepted or not is Haru's discretion alone. "Hibiki...Yeah, that's..." The tone of his voice makes it sound like there's definitely been some contact there as Haru emphasizes not once but twice that he should be taking some time to chat with her. That said, "I know her actions have been...Damning, but she doesn't on first glance come off using terror herself. Maybe freedom fighter...Still..." The thought doesn't complete, instead letting it fade on his lips as he instead finds himself truly trying to digest the next set of words to escape his lips. I'm not going to put a number to it. Things change, and fluctuate. You have to give people chances, know when it is meaningless to do so, and grasp that you might not know that for certain. "So, being willing to let people try... I know some people already consider that just failing to succeed. But I get that..." At that point, he lingers for a time letting him catch his breath and drink. At this point, he's been kind of more astounded that Haru's taken as much time as he has. Again, the look on his face kind of shows the astonishment of it all. By the time he's raised that finger up, there's just a nod. "That's fair, you've...Given me more time than you had to. Can you--/Give/ me a few seconds on this one. I should probably go soon too. I probably have to get ready for a late Valentine from a pirate trying to steal my heart...Or worse. Either way, I know it's getting late now, but at the very least I feel like I owe you in kind. So...If there's something you wanted to ask me, or a favor going on. Feel free to ask the next time around." It's hard to tell if Touta's the one now trying to make a joke or not in the first part. Yet the words that trail after seem serious enough to be taken in stride. Even now, he wonders if Haru ever had any questions about his actions. He knows for some people he cared, but he also cared enough for others not to push. But the simplest answer could have also just been...He wasn't that curious or already had answers of his own. "Still, yeah, I had a couple thoughts left and I don't want to waste this. It's been...Helpful. I had...A question I was going to ask. Something not related to the Watch or factions. It was going to be a question to put something together for someone else. But...I...Don't even know if that person would even want what that question might help lead to..."
Touta Konoe	Touta squints his eyes shut, a small inhale taken as his fists curl. Not in rage, at least not rage on his face. But there's definitely bitterness there. Ultimately his eyes slowly open again. "A part of me...Is afraid of asking you how to be better. Cause I know that the answer should be simple. I feel like I should know the answer, that I think I listen when I hear it, but then things like..." He looks to Haru again, not saying anything but hopefully getting the message across with the look he exchanges. It's then that he has another long pause, lingering on words from so many others. Eventually coming to something that compromises. Something for himself, that maybe...Maybe could be used for others as well. It comes out less like a question and more like desiring a confirmation. "People talk about being a tourist, and being superficially invested in others...About not giving yourself completely to people...When people only see you as a tourist, when they don't think you're genuinely invested in them, or want to try...Is it a matter of just trying to invest too much when they're already invested elsewhere? That they don't need you. Or...Is it just a matter of you can only offer someone up your entirety, when they need that much of you to begin with...? Or..." At that point, he looks to Haru, looking to see his response to the matter. A question that attempts to build a partial answer, to see what Haru answered in kind was something that he waits on a bit with genuine curiosity in his gaze towards him.
Hamada Haru	"She's an officer, so she bears higher responsibility for the actions of the organization overall. Failing to course correct-- that is what she's responsible for," Haru explains, gesturing vaguely with his left hand. He shook his head though, his eyes falling from the heavens back towards Touta. "How other people think about it isn't relevant. You are regarded as uninvested because people cannot ascertain what you care about with a reasonable measure of reliability. It isn't 'falling in with a specific group' that is necessary, but putting yourself on the line for something visible without breaking with it that they've been unable to perceive." "You are a person for whom corporeal loss is difficult," he adds. "It means less to risk flesh that you have an abundance of... but what you have to lose is considerably less finite than what many who look down on you have." "'What am I willing to fight for' is a question asked and answered unthinkingly by many. Once, I asked my compatriots in the Watch why they were a part of a specific investigation... what they got out of it, what it meant to them. They had no answer. And so, I left them to their emptiness. 'What am I willing to die for', once again this is asked and answered unthinkingly. Most important of all, 'What am I willing to become powerless for'..." He snorts, folding his arms over his chest and looking out across the horizon. "You should be able to answer them all. When the time comes, acting on what you said should be the expected course of action. If it isn't, you don't understand yourself, and others will find your lie." "Dedicating yourself to 'people' or 'tribe' is easiest. It is how we are wired. It is why they expect you to attach in this way at the very least, and are troubled when you have neither that or an alternative. There is no one and nothing you simply 'pick', or so I suppose. For me, I must be something specific, unerringly, forever," he explains. "I haven't followed your adventures... so I can't say where you erred in your interactions with others in total." Haru looks at the dirt beneath him, frowning. "I hate... giving people step-by-step instructions on how they've failed. But during the Exigent Serenity incident, what Lilian needed was somebody to take her vulnerability seriously. When Adachi started to disrupt the mindscape--" "She was surprised when I did something about it. Do you understand?" If Touta doesn't, he isn't given further elaboration. Haru pushes forward from his sidecar and climbs back onto his motorcycle, holding shy of the ignition. "The 'question' or 'favor'... is simply homework. Find what breaks your heart so terribly that you would trade all the power you have to make it not so. Descend the ladder of your reasons-- adventure is mere impulse." With that, Haru revved up his motorcycle and descended back into the earth below...
Touta Konoe	"Without breaking with it...? That's..." It's hard to say whether or not he's aware or not of what Haru means. At first the look tries like he's going to defend the statement, but ultimately, there's a moment to stop. As though knowing that words alone aren't enough to defend it. "...So it's not what they think but what they see...Yeah, I guess...I should have figured that. It's...People can show what they're about when they're willing to bleed for it." For someone like him, who bleeds easily, without identifying cause...There are things that he can't express in the same way for others with his pain, but because of it, meant that intending to express the things he held close had to be expressed even further for. 'What am I willing to fight for' is a question asked and answered unthinkingly by many. Once, I asked my compatriots in the Watch why they were a part of a specific investigation... what they got out of it, what it meant to them. They had no answer. And so, I left them to their emptiness. 'What am I willing to die for', once again this is asked and answered unthinkingly. Most important of all, 'What am I willing to become powerless for'... There's a strange look that's given as he sees Haru's snort to the last question. But still he makes sure to keep an ear open. In truth, these are all things that should be simple enough to understand, questions that should have answers. It's just that...Having the words said, helps bring things into focus. You should be able to answer them all. When the time comes, acting on what you said should be the expected course of action. If it isn't, you don't understand yourself, and others will find your lie. Yeah...Guess they will... There's already a look of defeat on his face as those words trail behind. For when he asks those questions, he always felt assured they were already answered and yet. He's in the position he is because others couldn't see the answers within him. Dedicating yourself to 'people' or 'tribe' is easiest. It is how we are wired. It is why they expect you to attach in this way at the very least, and are troubled when you have neither that or an alternative. There is no one and nothing you simply 'pick', or so I suppose. For me, I must be something specific, unerringly, forever, "Dedicating to a tribe...To a single group..." An exasperated sigh escapes his lips. "It feels like when it's like that it becomes less about who you're dedicated to, but more of, 'Which groups are you choosing to have as your enemy'? Sticking with the tribe that's...Sorry, that's just...I know that's not the case, but..." He stops himself, knowing that he's venting again. It'd be one thing if he was doing this to someone who was in a faction but...Haru was out on his own and even now they had just been speaking of Xion and yet... He shakes his head vehemently as if trying to physically rid the thoughts from his mind.Only stopping when Haru continues on. The talk of not knowing his story actually lightens things for a moment, "That's...Maybe that's better for me. For this...I'd only hope that if you did...That you'd still be willing to talk to me the same." At this point, Haru's getting on his bike, and Touta finds himself chewing over the last few words. "I...I don't think there's anything wrong with being upset about that. It's not your responsibility...It's their own. But I guess..." He starts shaking his head, "I barely see what others see that I should try talking like I have an idea of what goes through others heads. Still..."
Touta Konoe	Discussion of Lilian comes up, and with it, he starts to speak up as well. "I know on the radio before, you spoke about Lilian recently, talking about her vulnerabilities. I...Know I still have a long way to go on that but...A while back, I...I had told her I had something for her. It was letters from the kids from my orphanage. I tell them a few things about Elites sometimes, and other times they find out stuff on their own...But, I wanted to give her those letters. When I told her that, she...For a moment told me she was surprised. She said whenever someone spoke about having something for her, it was always just...A thing they needed. Not just something for her. It was...Nice...Hearing her sound so genuinely surprised...Happy...But...Just as quick as it came it was gone. I'd...I'd like to one day be able to do that for her. To give her something that doesn't have her feel like it's in exchange for something else." Those are the words that Haru is left with as he fades back into the ground. A final nod provided to Dynamic Era. Though in his absence is one final statement uttered. "But...I'm afraid of the cost that comes with that too..." As the words trail off, he looks to the stars. "A choice of making right with the person I hurt all that time ago...Or picking the person who's decided to stand by me now...Miss Tamamo...Discernment was never going to be this easy, was it?"