Scene #8888: All-Around Helper ^

Owner	Pose
Aidan Proudpick	RENDVILLE, OHIO Close to scenic Vore Ridge. Pop: 25. Average Age: 45+ Mostly Human, One Squirrel-Person. When Aidan bought the house, it was a dingy 2 bedroom, 1 bath fixer upper. Linoleum floors. Laminated countertops with cigarette burns. Poop brown carpetting that desperately needed to be shampooed. Aging window shutters. Water damaged cabinets. Barely worth the money that Aidan paid for it. Thankfully, having to tend to wooden mechanisms for 5 years has given Aidan a skill at wood working. An endless supply of youtube later and a couple trips to the hardware store later, the house is looking better, step by step. The flag post, instead of an American flag, has a green flag on it. Not well crafted, but a few steps above Child's Art Project, Aidan's half joke crest that he spent far too much time research. A heart, a shield, a squirrel, and an oak tree, wrapped with 'Open Heart For All'. It has been a wild few days for Aidan. A cascade of emotions have hit him. But he's tried to keep up with his schedule. Jog, funnel things to Quicknest, exercise, check on his contacts, jog, feel extremely bad for being disappointing to the entire multiverse, cook a mountain of soup, say goodbye to his shield, jog again. Thus, it is a wonderful turn to find a pleasant surprise on his doorstep. He grabs up the package with a grunt, hefting the house with a grunt. The inside itself is fairly simply. Livingroom, adjoining kitchen, two bedrooms, a full bathroom. It is clean in that Aidan keeps the floors and walls and counters clean of dirt and grime and spills, but it looks like it was organized by a blind wombat, stashes of tools on tables, learniong books on the couch, care products haphazardly arranged on the sink. Aidan, who recently has fucked up terribly by seeing a trick in every shadow, is happy to just enjoy his good fortune.
Angela	Close to Vore Ridge. The box is clearly labeled as mailed out from L Corp complete with a multiversal return address leading back there. The packaging itself has the L-Corp logo on it, complete with the L stabbing into the brain and even a 'Face The Fear, Build The Future' slogan emblazoned in multiple places. Opening up the box reveals a load of packing peanuts, protective styrofoam, and even some bubble wrap. And within all of that is... An egg like shape on a pair of two metal legs, complete with two red eyes and a big smile as it looks up at Aidan. "Hello! I am your friendly Helper Robot! How may I serve you?" The oval machine chirps in a tinny but friendly mechanical tone. "Environment contamination 90 percent, filth level middling.]" It adds with that service-style cheer.
Aidan Proudpick	A handful of peanuts to pop into his mouth for an after exercise snack. He takes a moment to chew as he looks into the package. In his tank top and basketball shorts, a pleasant 72 degrees, his mind somewhat clear thanks to a jog, Aidan is in the state of mind to smile. "I wonder if Miss Angela sent this to me. Probably to remind me how stupid and careless I am." A soft sigh, but a hopeful one, "Maybe if I hear her help everyday." He hefts the shape out of the box gently, rotating it physically like an apple in the mind of someone desperate to prove they are creative, then onto the table, his smile getting even wider. "Hey, you are kinda cute! This must have been expensive." A look around at his house, ruffling through his hair, "I was gonna organize it last weekend. I wouldn't say filthy." He looks back at his new robot, putting his hands on his knees and bending his body down to look properly at the robot eye to eye, tail twitching happily overhead. "Do you do dishes, please? I can put away my books."
Angela	Your All Around Helper IS very cute, cute enough that even a child would want to play with it. Those bright red eyes and that little smile is clearly designed around being adorable as all heck and family friendly. "Request for cleaning acknowledged! Thank you for choosing Helper Bot for your cleaning needs!" Those two lower appendages rapidly extend further down, punching holes in bubblewrap-- pop! pop pop! --and dig into the floor as the legs end in thick metal blades. They are, also, notably stained with blood! The head spins around to its side, still smiling serenely as two more appendages pull out of its back, ending similarly with bloodied blades. "Contaniment Detected! Commencing with cleaning!" The All Around Helper aims to swing two of its blades down for Aidan's shoulders, hoping to dig in and commence with cleaning! "Rrrrrrrrrrrr" The machine emits helpfully.
Aidan Proudpick	"Great! Alright, I guess you can sleep in the other bedroom, I got my guns in there, but I can move those somewhere else." Aidan hmms thoughtfully, frowning, "So, how much should I pay you, Helper Bot? Do you eat energon? I wonder how much energon costs." "Oh! You can walk, this is g-" Knives and blood. "OH. Oh." He immediately turns tail and starts running for the other side of the kitchen, desperately reaching for the freezer. He escapes having the muscles from his collar bones to his shoulders ripped into and severed. Instead, red hot pain lances out as the blades dig into his back instead. A flesh wound, but a bloody one. The white tanktop soon has two long gashes in it from his shoulders to his mid point, barely missing his tail. Blood immediately soaks into the tanktop, giving a deep shiny crimson, spreading out into a V. With one hand out, Aidan lets out a rush of breath, summoning the shield to his hand, the lion's head in full roar. With the other, Aidan pulls out an accelerator. A gun. A big fuck you pistol, a Dirty Harry special that uses .44 bullets, crafted in steel, wood, and some sort of wind turbine. Setting the shield in front of him with one hand, Aidan braces his other hand against the shield to fire at the Helper Robot. The cannon shot of a sound scares animals away from the feeders outside, but it's about 2 miles to the next house and no one gives a single damn about random gun shots.
Angela	The Helper Bot doesn't seem to be able to parse Energon. This is because it is, in fact, a robot and not a Cybertronian. It also isn't sapient in the way Angela is. If it was, it could probably recognize that its big sharp limbs are not actually suitable for cleaning! It continues to waddle across the floor. It sees styrofoam peanuts and it skewers one with a leg and then suctions up the peanuts into its underside. "Still detecting contaminents. Cleaning proving effective. Contaniment levels decreasing." After stabbing styrofoam for a moment, its attention is drawn to Aidan when he draws his Big Fuck You Pistol and shoots a Big Fuck You Bullet into the creature's body. It ricochets off of it, leaving a black smudge where the bullet impacted against its body. The head spins around forward as it clambers towards Aidan. It bonks against the sides of the doorways a bit before its AI adapts and it crouches down a a bit like a spider before pulling in and going for another singular stab towards Aidan's center mass. :)
Aidan Proudpick	The bullet careens off. Okay. Okay. He throws the gun away immediately. He remembers WPN. Think. What does Petra usually do about this? You've heard her talk all the time on the radio. What did he do at WPN. What was important. "Wait! I want to talk!" The helper bot comes closer, Aidan waving his hands at it. "I want to talk! There has to be something wrong, right? I.. you like to clean... blood... No, no, I'm making assumptions, I need to just listen." Knife. Aidan doesn't usually get to fight in a room with a lot of furniture. Thus, he doesn't get to show off his leaping expertise. He is already up on the counter, using the claws on his toes to dig in and leap across the room to the couch. The wound slides across his ankle, opening up a rather large and shiny gash, red with blood. He tilts with his tail to grab the couch in all four limbs, scrabbling like a crab on top of it to turn around towards the Helper Robot. "Do you want to talk about it? I'm happy to listen! I have coffee, I can bake us something!"
Angela	Something to keep in mind about Abnormalities is that Works are generally performed to prevent Breaches--not stop them. Breaches tend to happen when the Works fail and usually USUALLY by that point there is only one solution. The All Around Helper continues smiling ceaselessly as Aidan tries to communicate. "Rrrrrrrrr" is the HelperBot's Helpful Response. Aidan offers coffee. Aidan offers baking. Lesser creatures may be tempted by such bribes but that would make them less helpful and the Helperbot is quite helpful indeed. That is all it wants to do, really. Is help. And fortunately, the more it stabs Aidan the more Aidan is shouting and the more Aidan is shouting the more the All Around Helper interprets it as cries of gratitude. What does the Helper do when it receives gratitude? More cleaning of course! It climbs up after Aidan precariously on the tippy top of his couch, legblades stabbing in and ripping out stuffing with each step. "Cleaning couch!" The Helperbot chirps as it aims to stick its leg into Aidan's hip. The other legs sink further into the couch as its sort of struggling with the unusual terrain.
Aidan Proudpick	Aidan smiles. Every loves a smile. Okay, everyone who isn't an Elite who knows him loves a smile. It starts climbing up closer, and doesn't speak, his couch getting ripped up with each stab. He groans, thinking of having to pay another giant truck owner to haul a couch from Good Will. "Did Hod's training video say 'Abnormalities is that Works are generally performed to prevent Breaches--not stop them. Breaches tend to happen when the Works fail and usually USUALLY by that point there is only one solution.' Hurricanes, why didn't I listen!" Aidan hisses in horrible pain as he leaps again, his basketball shorts now cut along the hip. He grabs the chandlier in the middle of the room, a 1970s chandlier that is the only light in the room. He swings with it towards the bedrooms. With no chance of talking things out, Aidan has to shift into fight mode. Except he hasn't been in a fight like this for three years. Some minor training, a couple of battles against putties, but always side by side. Slow them down, get higher ground, attack. Aidan hefts up the worst of all things. He grabs the thick grenade in his fingers and hurls it across the room at the couch and carpet and Robot before scrambling up to cling to the ceiling itself and rush towards the bedroom.
Angela	Hod's training videos are in the process of being updated! Please look forward to the updated training videos somewhere between Gebura's Meltdown and Binah's! It probably won't cover this event though. After all, what are the odds of an Agent being MAILED an Abnormality? Actually, this seems like something that...shouldn't be happening to begin with? But it probably would take someone a bit more aware of Angela's situation to really consider the possibility of her breaking a rule for this, right? Regardless these are the kind of thoughts best served for later. The HelperBot is relentless but it is in a bit of a pickle thanks to the couch . It can't seem to get free! And Aidan gets to prove that 'Resistant to physical damage' is not the same as 'immune' to physical damage. He chucks the grenade, hitting the Abnormality dead on and send it flying with a concussive explosion. Is it over? A leg pokes out of the smoke, carving a line into the floor of Aidan's home. A second leg pokes out, shakingly. Sparks flash off the All Around Helper as it pulls itself out of the smoke, its white frame charred from the explosive blast and consiserably embedded with shrapnel. Smiling it attempts to ram into Aidan, having decided that he is not just a mess... BUT A TRICKY MESS.
Aidan Proudpick	Alright, Aidan's got the upper hand. Running the opponent out of energy is a truly awful move, but he has no other choice. The robot smashes into Aidan's ankle, hitting the previous wound and making him hiss in pain again. But he's charging now. Adrenaline pumps through his veins. "Petra would come kill me herself. Gebura wouldn't... that Myo lady?" He reaches into his bathroom, grabbing every off the sink to smash it on the floor. He actually can afford to spend money on good moisturizer since he only has his various little pawpads to worry about. It smashes down on the floor, spilling gunk everywhere. A tube of mascara, unused, thrown to the floor. Once he has another wide mess on the floor, he lifts his hands upward, rushing out a breath of air. The air gathers up underneath the robot, white air circulating around it. "Yea, why don't you CLEAN THE YARD!" He flings on hand forward, and the air underneath the robot YEETS it at a window.
Angela	The Helperbot gets YEETED to the window but it latches onto the windows. This robot doesn't seem discriminate. If it gets out it might just clean the OUTSIDE WORLD. But it isn't ready to give up juuust yet either. Its head spins around once more like its cocking its head at Aidan before throwing itself free, stabbing furiously at the mascara as it hobbles in Aidan's direction. That left leg isn't looking too good! "Cleaning in progress!" The All Around Helper chirps once more. MEANWHILE Angela leans back in her chair, watching the hands of a clock tick away very very verrrrrrry Slowly.
Aidan Proudpick	Aidan is ABSOLUTELY willing to keep doing this. Very very slowly chipping away at it. The robot grabs onto the window ledge, making AIdan's eyes go wide as that simply doesn't work. "Fuck!" He charges into the room. "Okay, no one else really hates me there. Except-" Aidan groans, and mutters to himself, since no one can hear him. "No, okay. I deserve this, Miss Angela. I deserve this. I'm sorry." He slams the door closed with his foot and stands behind it. Guhhh. A new door costs like 300 dollars, and he is going to have to hang it himself! Two balls of wind in either hand. Both spinning in a different direction. White swirls make the sheets on the bed flicker, the curtains flap around the room, the windows rattle. He closes his hands together. Wind crashes against itself, blowing in turn, drawing in. He closes his fingers together, letting the wind draw itself together. A Naruto style cheating trick. Thankfully, Aidan hasn't met Naruto to feel bad about. The wind ball becomes the size of a peanut and Aidan swallows it. Whisps of wind swirl out of his fingers, up his arms, out of his mouth with every pant. No one is around. No one can hear him say it. "WI-" Still, that worry that he hasn't EARNED the right to shout something. Instead, he flings both hands out at the door, sending a hundred darts of air at it and through it. The door explodes off its hinges towards the Robot Helper, darts flying through it.
Angela	Angela is now no longer staring at a clock, she is instead wearing her pirate captain hat and is listening to one of Hook's stories. Unfortunately, she cannot hear Aidan apologize. If she could hear it, well, it's hard to say what she'd do now. All she wanted from her father is to not be ignored. She didnt even demand love. Just.... something. But Aidan isnot her father. And she can't hear him right now anyway. She sent something that just won't care if he apologizes. something he just has to fight and beat. The machine is slowing down and that last burst of wind slams the machine hard enough against a wall to crack it The Abnormality shudders once. "CLEAN KTRRK ING RRRRRRR" It says, its voice shrill from damage as it lunges at Aidan once more, trying to stab down into his feet! "CLEAN..CLEAN..CLEAN." one of its eyes gets gouged out by the darts. The smile never goes away. ;)
Aidan Proudpick	Aidan grits his teeth as two more slashes drag into him, knives dragging through his thighs. Two more slashes scares appear on his thighs. He staggers back, staring at the creature, snarling. He starts pulling up all the extra wind in his body, preparing himself to fight to the end... Over what? Possessions? Clothes? A couple maps. Aidan flicks his hand back, opening a nearby window. He bites down in his pride and leaps out the window. Staggering across his lawn, blood dripping on the ground, he stumbles towards a tree, grasping at the bark to quickly climb it. He hoists a bug out bag onto his shoulder, a duffel bag with a few supplies, an extra gun, a bunch of dried nuts and mushrooms. He waits. If the robot follows him, he can at least jump out of the tree safely and get some distance. If he died over his stupid house, he would hate himself.
Angela	The All Around Helper doesn't immediately chase after Aidan. It spends the next while making an all around wreck of Aidan's house while trying to 'Clean' it. Aidan can readily get to the tree no problem! Because he isn't being chased. The machine radily destroys packing peanuts, styrofoam, couches, chairs, Aidan's nuts (the snack), any shed fur it notices. It keeps on stabbing and slicing across the household and the more it cleans the more it wants to clean MORE and the more it wants to clean MORE the more interesting a definition cleaning tends to take. It is not a fast process, unfortunately. It probably takes at least an hour before the All Around Helper finally wrecks the place enough to destroy a very important support beam and the house collapses in on itself. On the plus side, this squishes the Helper Bot on enough rubble that, alongside with the damage Aidan had already done to it, is plenty enough to destroy it. The negative side, well. As the All Around Helper reappears in egg form back at Lobotomy Corp, Angela is finally distracted from Hook's story. Did Aidan triumph? Or did the Helper Bot destroy itself? Angela has no way of knowing so she sends a message over one of the bands. She sighs. This should feel good, right? Revenge? It doesn't actually feel good at all. What is the solution? Angela isn't sure, but she'll try more revenge and see if that solves the problem. There's always more people she needs revenge on.
Aidan Proudpick	It's... something. Aidan slowly lowers himself down out of the tree, blood on his wounds. He calls up Chia and Strawberry, two of the People's Kn-Rebels. People's Rebels. Not Knights. Guns. The flag. The shield. That silk shirt he paid a lot of money for so he can meet royalty. Another meager set of belongings. It'll take a while for police sirens to catch up. Bag on his shoulder, Aidan heads to Quicknest. Where he should have always been.