1470/Welcome To Human Resources
From Multiverse Crisis MUSH
Welcome To Human Resources | |
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Date of Scene: | 01 February 2015 |
Location: | Human Resources offices |
Synopsis: | Yari meets her bosses. Confusion and hazing ensue. |
Cast of Characters: | 234, 336, 691 |
- Lu-Mey (234) has posed:
The offices of Human Resources, located somewhere within the Citadel has quiet moments. Times when there is a lull in the paperwork and shuffle of scribbling pens... Times when the group's varied collection of killers and spies are generally out and busy.
Now seems to be just one of those times. Other than a few intern shinobi darting around, trainee hitmen, interim hiree probationary sweepers, and utterly terrified looking clerical workers stuck in the office, it's just one of those days.
Probably a perfect time to meet the bosses. Though Lu-Mey doesn't seem to have an office of her own, one of the horrified paper jockeys does point out she can generally be found in Starless Night's office.
- Starless Night (336) has posed:
There is an intern or something here. Nothing special. Looks like a young man, probably a new recruit, slight of build and at one end of said office. One might wonder how an intern has access to such sensitive files, but then the files themselves are probably encoded, and his current task seems to be... well, organizing the bookshelf.
- Yari Takane (691) has posed:
One such newly acquired killer intends to do just that. Dressed in more 'casual' clothing today, the horned Au Ra ninja has descended upon the offices with her typical quiet and stoic manner. Terror is one thing she certainly doesn't use. Indeed, interns and clerks will be given polite, if quiet, greetings as she passes. For a Fed, this woman is noticeably /nice/.
It's often enough to put people off their guard. And Yari isn't above capitolizing on it. With a knock upon the door, Yari raises her voice slightly.
"Miss Starless? Centurion Takane reporting. May I enter?" This, of course, is said over the radio. She'll wait before entering!
- Lu-Mey (234) has posed:
Well the other interns welcome the change, the Au Ra being disarmingly nice and all.
The knock is met with... Silence, and whatever the organizing intern might reply with. At least for a moment. Then comes the snore. A soft, chittering rumble that says some pretty sound sleep might have just been disturbed. Indeed, because as that 'intern' works on filing and organizing Starless office, Lu-Mey IS in fact present.
Sprawled out right on the desk like she owns it, an arm dangling off one side, legs sprawled, she's using a stack of paperwork as a pillow.
To her credit she's not drooling. Too much.
In the dusky-skinned Oni's hand is some manner of file or another, but she's apparently too busy being out stone cold to read it, nose twitching as she stirs only vaguely.
- Yari Takane (691) has posed:
Wait. Wait. Frown. Yari finally takes a calculated risk. With a salute to the door, she hails the radio once more.
"Entering!"
And then Yari Takane opens the door, and snaps a salute out of pure instinct. To a sleeping Oni. The young woman pauses, and simply /stares/ for a moment. Red creeps into her features.
The Oni is big, tall, and right now? /Adorable/. That salute fades into the Au Ra holding her hands in front of her, eyes slightly wide in pure amazement. Thankfully, rather than embarrass herself, she tries to recover. It only partially works. There's still mostly 'That is so cute' written all over her features.
"Centurion Takane, reporting!" Calls out Yari finally, attempting to awaken the dancing giant.
- Lu-Mey (234) has posed:
When it comes to the Lu-Tirae Oni, the men can certainly become towering slabs of muscle. Lu-Mey is on the smaller end of the spectrum, being on par in height with an average human woman- perhaps ecen a little shorter; and rather sleek of frame and build, and...
She doesn't budge. Not in the face of HR's newest member. Not for her report for duty, and not for that salute.
For a moment anyway. But another twitch of her nose and with a small chittering in her throat, lashes flutter. Then eyes slit open and Lu-Mey smoothly sits herself up.
With the top sheet of that paper stack still stuck to her cheek.
Blearily she stares for a moment at the Au Ra. Then she glances down at the file in her hands. Then back up. Then to the file.
"OH!"
Realization dawns.
"You must be Yari! Hello~!" First name basis seems just fine for Lu-Mey as pauses after her greeting for a long, luxurious, cat-like stretch. "Were you here to see Starless? Because if you are, as her secretary I'm honor bound to obstinately bar your path and give you every excuse in the book as to why she's not available, as per ritual newbie hazing rules."
- Yari Takane (691) has posed:
Already, Yari can't help but file Lu-Mey under 'interesting'. It only intensifies as she awakens, and so bluntly states her goal! When her first name is used, she stiffens uncertainly, before relaxing slightly. The centurion is still at attention.
"Correct, Miss Lu-Mey. I wished to make initial reports and debriefings regarding my new role in the organization." Pause. She blinks once.
"Newbie...hazing. A ritual to test those newly joined as well as enhance social bonding between comrades. Understood, Ma'am!" Another one of those sharp salutes.
"Then, I must hereby request a meeting with Miss Starless Night at the earliest opportunity. I am prepared to face any paperwork or physical challenges in order to do so!" For all of her sharp, military enthusiasm, her voice is still quiet and understated. It may come across as somewhat odd.
- Lu-Mey (234) has posed:
First things first, Lu-Mey gently peels the very important and drool-soaked form off her cheek and sets it back on the pile. Still, she's good and comfortable on the desk and remains right where she is, simply crossing her legs as she leans on her elbow to one side and clucks.
"Ah ah ah, none of this 'Miss'. Just Lu-Mey." She corrects. "And this saluting- not in the office. Not in the field. Get that our of your system~. We're murderers, thieves, spies, killers, and all around very bad people. So not only is it something we simply don't do, but it keeps others from figuring out who we work with."
She pauses.
"Though it does make for a neat trick when you salute someone you don't like when there's risk of enemy snipers around."
This makes her titter for a moment before getting down to business.
The oni slides on a set of frameless glasses and picks up a small black book and a pencil. "Ah well let's see, Starless is... Well it looks like she's available... If you can actually find her. Good luck with that, she's really good at hiding. --I can give you a hint though if you'd like."
- Starless Night (336) has posed:
The intern wanders over and holds up a book. "Ah... I don't see a label on this one. S-sorry to interject." He fidgets and clearly tries to keep Yari between himself and Lu-Mey while he shows the book, which appears to be a dog breeding manual. "What should I do?"
- Yari Takane (691) has posed:
The twin ideas of /not/ saluting and being on a first name basis with her boss? Poor Yari looks briefly bewildered by the mere concept. Intellectually, she knows people do such things...usually Eorzeans...but to be asked to be so casual with a superior?
Yari's a little terrified. Is this a test of loyalty?
Her tail squeezes her own ankle, betraying her inner panic. "Understood, Miss...Lu-Mey. Lu-Mey." She repeats, as if tasting the word. From the uncertainty, this is not comfortable.
At least she can understand the logic behind it all.
/Ahh/, so it is a test. Yari straightens, gaze confident if wary. "Any intelligence you possess...Lu-Mey...would be of great assistance."
Oh, an intern. The woman finally turns to regard him.
"Inspect the existing manuscripts. Most are ordered either by title name, or author." Offers the ninja to the intern. Yari should've been a librarian in a past life.
- Lu-Mey (234) has posed:
And Lu-Mey almost seems to relish that befuddlement. Dark lips slowly spread into fanged smile of razors and blades as scarlet eyes observe the Au Ra as she digests her newest instructions on the social proprieties of assassins and killers. Gaze flits down, not missing the slithering coil of tail around Yari's ankle. Not a single thing is missed, down to the smallest twitch and breath. If anything, nearly getting called 'miss' again almost seems to make that grin widen to a leer.
The Oni spreads her palms in a lazy display when The Intern asks for assistance. "I was going to suggest our new recruit answer that but I can see she's already taken the liberty of doing so! Oh I do LIKE proactive new members don't you?"
- Starless Night (336) has posed:
The intern blinks, "Er... well all right, but I meant it just didn't seem like the kind of book that should be in this office. Maybe it's a code or somefin." The intern wanders over to the shelf again, and adds like it's an afterthought, "I wouldn't expect it from this one, but I guess people are full of surprises, aren't they?"
- Yari Takane (691) has posed:
For the record, Lu-Mey's smile can be creepy. Even without using certain insect based abilities. Seemingly lazy and at times adorable or not, Yari has no doubt the woman got here for a reason. And not just for distraction reasons.
A predator knows a predator, after all. Yari grows all the stiffer under that leer, military discipline making a good show of punching down instinct.
There's a twitch of her natural arm, a salute barely avoided.
"Stagnation and inaction lead to ambush and death." Quotes Yari of her mother-slash-ex-Legatus.
Then, Intern. Her head tilts just a moment. As the inter wanders over, she follows out of pure curiousity. She'll start reading the other books in the office, looking for patterns, or anything out of place.
Should the book in the intern's hand not track with the rest as her eyes gaze upon the others? She'll reach out and take it.
"I am requisitioning this." She states prior to examining the cover, title, inside front, and then cracking open the tome proper.
But she hasn't forgotten Lu-Mey.
"You were mentioning intel...Lu-Mey." See, miss Oni? The little lizardess is trying. Even if that tail's far too stiff, and every movement filled with being completely out of her element in this casual office.
- Lu-Mey (234) has posed:
Predatory is an apt descriptor for the Oni. And not simply for those razor sharp teeth. Oh no, there is no subtle nuance that does not go unobserved, as the Oni practically licks her lips in a clear displau of how the food chain works. But then she folds her hands together. "Oh that's good. It's a good thing you know that, because we're more... Fluid around here. We prefer to be the ambushers and the ones that send people their little pink slips to life; not the other way around." She notes.
"Intel? Oh did I? That's funny, I don't recall..." It's like the Oni is completely ADD about the whole conversation at hand as tuts and waggles a finger. "We don't requisition here. We take. I'm thinking I might need to work with you from the ground up, maybe. What do YOU think?" She asks of the completely normal intern.
- Starless Night (336) has posed:
Said intern lets Yari look over the bookshelves. Anatomy, various biology books, some mystical sorts, and lots of things concerning human relations and psychology, along with of course texts on psychology of other races in the multiverse. The intern steps aside and leans on the desk, stretching with a loud siigh.... then he speaks in a very flowing, female voice.
"She has skills. Perceptiveness isn't bad. Not very relaxed, but I can see how she's worth keeping around."
- Yari Takane (691) has posed:
Sharp teeth and licking of lips are /not/ things that inspire good feelings in general. That urge to fight or flee ever tickles down her spine now that the Oni has her full predator gaze offered to the young lamb that is one Yari Takane. She might be good at her job, but she's certainly yet to have gained the experience and instinct of a natural born killer. Her movements are too stiff, militant actions of training without a wealth of practical application behind it.
But at least she's well trained, and hasn't bolted out the door. There's no initial response to the 'fluid' ways of doing things. That tiny tug of a frown lasts for a split second longer than intended. Her tail unwinds, and her gaze flicks to the intern.
And then the intern speaks in a feminine voice. It suddenly clicks.
"...The ability to mold one's form. Miss Starless Night?" There's still a slight bit of awe in her voice over such a possibility, but it passes. Garen, after all, had told her of such things.
There's a tensing fist and arm. She's not saluting. But barely.
- Yari Takane (691) has posed:
Then, the oni gets a look. Here, there's a half-bow. "I am prepared to sharpen my skills and submit to any training you require, Lu-Mey." Finally answers the young Au Ra. Training and discipline, at the least, are things she's far more comfortable with. Oddly the idea of being trained by her boss seems almost relaxing for her.
- Lu-Mey (234) has posed:
Indeed, at least Yari hasn't run like a frightened lamb. Lu has probably had too much fun with aspiring shinobi and novice killers in the past, but the fact that this one HASN'T booked it earns a melodic, and haughty "Ohohohoho~" of a laugh as the dusky-skinned dancer slides off her seat on the desk and Starless decides to stop playing around.
With a motion as smooth as silk, she slides behind the Au Ra, hands planting on shoulders for a little rub. "She IS an interesting one." Mused to The Completely Ordinary Intern That May or May Not Be HER boss. "I will... Give her points for her observational skills at least. Maybe ah... Half marks for now. She can earn the other half-- Very soon in fact. I might have a job for this one. Assuming she can survive it."
A tut and she remembers to stop speaking like Yari isn't in the room. "Oh no, it's obvious you have training. Your dossier said as much."
Holy shit, Lu actually did some homework.
"It's experience, we'll be working on getting you here, in HR~."
- Starless Night (336) has posed:
Starless-Intern shakes her head, though the face is still male. "Not precisely, though there are some who can do that. I have numerous means of disguise at my fingertips, but my main specialty is a different kind of infiltration."
She smiles then, and laces fingers together. Now that she's relaxing, even with the male face the body takes on a slightly more femnine look. "We all have our specialities."
- Yari Takane (691) has posed:
And thus Boss Number Oni slipped behind the good Au Ra. The other woman's movements are something to see, and now? A shoulder rub feels pretty good. She relaxes just a hair.
Mental note, find an oni masseuse. The stiff-shouldered Centurion is half-tempted to ask, before the thought is dashed by the mention of a job.
Cue stiffness, but in the military efficiency vein. Toes curl a little as she reminds herself to not salute. Yari manages to prove one can salute with one's eyes as she peeks behind her first at Lu-Mey, then the Totally Legit Intern.
The opportunity to get out in the field has her brightening in that subdued way. Like a lazily flickering candle, only with far more tail swishing that bumps occasionally against the Oni or Intern Boss should she get too close.
"I am at your command, Lu-Mey."
As for the Boss? There's a small nod. "I look forward to seeing your skills in the field. Do you have standing orders until this 'job'?"
- Lu-Mey (234) has posed:
Working with Lu-Mey is one big game of give and take. She gives a shoulder rub. She takes away that nice feeling by mentioning a job- which may incur danger to life and limb, mere seconds afterwards. Nevertheless, that grin does NOT go away when Starless-Intern drops the charade. Not that this means the hazing is closer to being done, as Lu gives the Au Ra a small pat. "Oh no, you're Starless' to command. You just report to me if she decides you've messed up, and generally pray I'm not hungry when you do." She titters.
"That said. I find our little group a lot of things to do in my spare time, so it's not unusual to be hearing from me, often. So it's a good idea to stop by the office every now and then to see what I've slapped on the bulletin boards."
A clap of her hands and it looks like official business and hazing are done... For now. "Well, I thin kthat about sums it up. Welcome to Human Resources. The tail is adorable, by the way."
- Yari Takane (691) has posed:
"While I cannot say with certainty, I believe I am distinctly distasteful and inedible." Is that an attempt at humor from the woman? The delivery is flat and utterly devoid of inflection. And she's still partially at attention.
"A 'job's board'. Understood!" Nod. She gets it.
Then Yari is opening her mouth to give an another affirmative. But Lu-Mey strikes yet another weak point on the woman. That tail, as if alive, tries to sneak behind an ankle as a most curious shade of red creeps along her cheeks.
As though she'd been burned, the ninja gives a red-cheeked bow.
"Miss Starless, Lu-Mey, it has been an honor. I will return to my duties." Then, she's beating a hasty, embarrassed exit. That tail of hers is swishing in equal parts shame and a bit of happiness mixed. As soon as she's out of the door? The scent of smoke and sounds of lizard-women devouring liquor with indecent haste can be heard.
- Lu-Mey (234) has posed:
Lu-Mey's job here is done, and the newbie has been successfully inducted into Human Resources. She turns to Starless-Intern once Yari makes her escape.
"I like that one. Let's keep her."